Waiting For You
by eorocks
Summary: Olivia runs into an old friend; will their romance be rekindled? Elliot watches as he realizes he may have waited too long and Olivia may be slipping out of reach.
1. Chapter 1

_These characters do not belong to me. They belong to Dick Wolf. E/O forever._

**EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO**

Olivia let out a loud sigh as she closed the file folder on her desk. She threw her pen down on her desk, and leaned back in her chair.

"I am done. That was the last one." Olivia and Elliot had been cleaning up all their paperwork after another busy week in SVU.

"Let's go over to O'Malley's and get a drink" said Fin. "It's been a long week. I'll buy the first round." Fin looked around. "Anyone in?"

Munch nodded. "I'm in."

Elliot looked over at Olivia. "I'm in. What d'ya say Liv?"

"I don't know. I'm tired and I really just wanted to go home."

"C'mon Liv" said Elliot. "It won't be the same without you". Elliot wiggled his eyebrows at her. "One drink".

Olivia sighed. She knew it wouldn't be just "one" drink, but she didn't really have anything to go home to. "OK" she said. "One drink."

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Munch, Fin, Elliot and Olivia were sitting around a horseshoe shaped booth, each with a drink in their hand. Chester Lake walked up, along with Casey and slid into the booth.

Everyone was laughing and talking, having a good time unwinding. The bar was crowded, and there was a small dance floor, where a few people were dancing to music on a juke box. The waitress was trying to keep up with the team, but as the bar got more crowded, she fell behind.

"I need another beer." Said Olivia, lifting up her empty bottle.

"Jeez Liv" said Elliot. "You're really sucking them down fast tonight! Miss One Beer." He teased.

"If you recall, I said I was going to go home; you guys are the ones that pushed me to come. And I have only had two beers." She bumped him with her hip. "Slide out so I can go get another beer." She turned towards the rest of the crew. "Anyone else? I'm making a run."

Casey lifted her beer bottle. "I'm out. I'll take another one."

"Wow" said Munch. "The ladies are drinking us under the table tonight. I'm only starting my 2nd drink."

"We can't help it if you guys are lightweights." Casey said.

Elliot watched Olivia as she walked over to the bar. He was watching the reaction of the men in the bar as they watched her pass by. Olivia was a gorgeous woman, with dark brown eyes, olive skin, and auburn tresses falling to her shoulder. Her body looked amazing in her blue jeans and t-shirt, showcasing the curve of her hips and ass, and her generous breasts. Sometimes, Elliot thought that she really wasn't aware of her beauty; her impact on men. Or maybe beautiful woman just got used to the lingering stares and the constant come-on's; they learned how to deal with it. He thought this probably the case with Olivia; because there were times that he had seen Olivia use it to her advantage.

"Look at that" said Munch. "I think Olivia has a following." he said, as if he was reading Elliot's mind. "Too bad those guys don't know what a badass she is."

Elliot watched as Olivia made it to the bar, wedging herself into an open space and flagging down the bartender. The guy standing next to her looked her up and down. He leaned over, saying something to Olivia and placing his hand on her lower back. Olivia looked at the guy, smiling and saying something to him, as the bartender placed her order down in front of her. They guy was still talking, and let his hand slide down lower. Olivia reached back, grabbed his arm, and twisted it, all while smiling at him. The man staggered backwards, knocking into the guy behind him. Olivia grabbed the beers off the bar and started walking back towards the table, leaving the drunk man behind.

"What was that about?" asked Elliot when Olivia reached the table and slid in next to him.

"We disagreed on his desire to buy me a drink. He didn't take no for an answer, so I showed him the error of his ways." Olivia smiled sweetly.

"Brains, beauty and brawn." Said Fin. "A dangerous combination. Guy doesn't know what hit him." Fin laughed.

"Liv and Casey" said Munch. "Tell me the truth. Do you feel flattered when all these guys stare at you all the time, hit on you all the time? Or does it get old?"

Elliot stared at Munch, surprised at the question that had just been going through Elliot's mind.

Olivia looked at Casey. "I don't know John." said Olivia. "I mean, it's always nice to be appreciated; to be complimented. Every woman wants to be beautiful sometimes. Every woman wants to feel sexy sometimes. I guess what bothers me is that a woman can't be sexy and beautiful AND smart. So that's what gets to me. If a guy wants to tell me I look nice or whatever, that's fine. But it doesn't give him an automatic license to touch my ass or assume I am going to jump into bed in appreciation."

"What Liv said." Said Casey, taking a swig of her beer and sneaking a peek at Chester.

"Well" said John. "I think beautiful women have a lot of power. There are lots of men that would do anything for a beautiful woman. We see it every day."

Olivia laughed. "I guess so. Depends on the woman. Don't worry, I can handle myself.

"I think it bothers Elliot more than it bothers Liv." Fin teased.

Olivia looked over at Elliot to gauge his reaction. "Haha." Said Elliot, not denying it but not saying anything else.

Olivia bumped her shoulder against Elliot's. "He's always got my back." Said Olivia, smiling at Elliot.

Elliot took another drink, emptying half the bottle. He sighed. Olivia had been his partner for over 8 years, and they were close. They were probably closer than partners should be. They had amazing chemistry; they had from the very beginning. At first, he told himself that he was just watching out for a friend; for his best friend. But the truth was, he couldn't stand to think of her with another man. He knew he had scared off a lot of guys over the years. He never said anything out loud, but he must have let her know of his disapproval in other ways, as none of her relationships lasted very long. She always said it was the job, but maybe it was him. On the other hand, Olivia was hard to get to know. She didn't let many people in. At the end of the day, their lives were impossibly tangled together. He and Olivia had worked hard to define the boundaries of their relationship, never crossing that well defined line. Elliot had been married for 20 years; he had 4 children. He would never have crossed that line and cheated on his wife, and Olivia wouldn't have put his marriage in danger either.

But now Elliot was divorced. He had been for a couple of months, moving into his own apartment in the city and getting adjusted to a life as a bachelor. As he adjusted to his new life, he had started to think more about 'what if' and Olivia. He let himself explore all of the feelings he had suppressed; allowed himself to give in to his daydreams, wondering about kissing her, holding her…and more.

"Elliot." Said Olivia, shaking his shoulder. "Are you listening to me?"

"Sorry Liv. I was thinking about something else."

She sighed. "Never mind. I am going to the bathroom. Will you order another beer for me if she comes around?" Olivia slid out of the booth and headed across the bar to the bathrooms.

As Olivia walked to the bathroom, she thought about Elliot. She had been thinking about him more and more often lately, trying to figure out their relationship. When Elliot was married, it was easy to define. They were partners and best friends. She could look, but not touch. She could dream, but not act on her emotions. But now Elliot was a free man, and she was still confused. She thought he would make some kind of 'move'. But he hadn't. So that was making her think that maybe she was wrong. That he was just a flirt and she had misinterpreted all of the looks and the comments and the…intensity. She tried to put it out of her mind.

As she made her way back to the table, she skirted the dance floor. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a guy cutting across the dance floor, headed towards her. She kept looking straight ahead and sighed. She wasn't up for another guy hitting on her. She smiled a little, thinking that Elliot was probably watching her. She wondered what he was thinking. She was almost back to the table, distracted by her thoughts, when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned her head, ready to decline whatever he asked.

"Olivia?"

She turned her body then, looking at the man that had stopped her. He was about Elliot's height, and it was obvious he worked out. He had dark wavy hair and dark eyes, and a great smile. Olivia took all of this in within seconds.

"It IS you." he said.

Olivia paused a second. "Matt? Oh my God. Is that really you?" Olivia broke into a big smile.

Matt smiled and reached out, embracing Olivia in a big hug. She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him back; the hug lingering for a moment. She pulled back, but he kept his hands on her upper arms.

"My God Olivia. You look fantastic. You're even more beautiful than I remember. I can't believe I just ran into you like this!" He ran his eyes up and down, taking her in.

Olivia blushed a little. "It's been a long time Matt."

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Elliot watched Olivia as she walked back across the room. As usual, several guys were watching her, and he watched as one guy left his table and followed her across the floor, finally intercepting her close to their table. He watched, ready to come to the rescue if the guy started hassling her. He was surprised when Olivia reached in and hugged the man. He was even more surprised when the man's hands lingered on Olivia's hips as they hugged. His eyes narrowed as he watched them.

Fin and Munch noticed that Elliot had stopped talking and looked over to see what was distracting him.

"Looks like Olivia found a new friend" Fin teased Elliot. "You know that guy? " asked Fin.

"No. Never seen him before." He continued to watch as Olivia talked with the mystery man. She had a big smile on her face, and gestured over to their table a few times as she talked. After a few minutes, they started to walk over to the table. They all stopped talking when Olivia reached the table.

"Hey. I want to introduce you to an old friend of mine." started Olivia.

"Friend? Ouch." The man made a stabbing gesture to his chest.

Olivia blushed. "A good friend. This is Matt Harris. Matt and I went to college together. Matt, these are some of the people I work with." As she introduced them, she pointed to each person at the table. "This is Munch, Fin, Chester, Casey, and my partner, Elliot."

"I can't believe you're a detective Olivia" said Matt. "With all the laws you broke in college…it didn't seem like a likely career for you!" Matt laughed.

Olivia poked him in the ribs with her elbows. "The laws I broke? Seems to me you were right there with me."

Munch chimed in. "This is fantastic. Someone that knew you in college Liv. Matt, I bet you have lots of great stories and I, for one, would love to hear them. I would love to hear that Little Miss Perfect here has a dark side."

Fin laughed. "I second that!"

"Olivia was real wild child in college" started Matt. "She was always up for anything. Liked to push the boundaries. I always told her she was the most uninhibited person I knew." He had a mischievous look in his eyes, snaking his hand up and squeezing her shoulder.

"Matt!" said Olivia. "I have to work with these people. They do NOT need to hear any stories. And you exaggerate." She bumped her hip against him, letting him know it was time to shut up.

Elliot watched the body language between Matt and Olivia. He could tell they had been close, the way they kept touching each other in small ways as the conversation went on.

"C'mon Liv" said Casey. "We don't know anything about you before you came to SVU. We want some dirt!"

Olivia turned and pointed a finger at Matt. "Don't you dare!" He grabbed her finger.

"I could never deny you" he said with a smile. A statement that made Elliot scowl. He needed to stop this…whatever this was.

"So Matt. What do you do for a living?" asked Elliot.

"I'm in a band." Said Matt. "Vocals and guitar."

"Hmm." Elliot made a non-committal sound. "You live here in the city?"

"Yes. We have been touring around the country and have spent the last year or so in Boston. But I wanted to get back home; back to New York. I knew it was a good move." He looked over at Olivia with a smile on his face.

Olivia caught his smile, but then looked back towards the group. She caught the scowl on Elliot's face and quickly dropped the smile. She distanced herself away from Matt a little and grabbed her beer off the table.

"Matt, you want a beer?" asked Fin.

"Ah, no. I had better get back to my friends." Matt gestured to a table of guys across the bar. "Olivia, can I talk to you for a minute?"

Olivia shot a look at Elliot before she turned back to Matt. "Sure." She turned back to the group. "Be right back."

Olivia followed Matt as he headed away from the table. He stopped a few yards away and turned back towards Olivia.

"Olivia. I still can't believe I ran into you." He paused. "So, um…are you and your partner…involved?"

Olivia laughed. "Involved? That's an interesting question. Elliot and I have been partners for over 8 years, so we're close. But not in the way you think."

"Oh, because I was definitely getting some dirty looks from him."

"Yeah, well that's Elliot." Said Olivia, rolling her eyes slightly.

"I was wondering if you'd give me your phone number. Maybe we could go out for coffee, or dinner? Catch up?" Matt looked at her hopefully.

Olivia got a big smile on her face. "I'd like that." Matt pulled out his phone and Olivia grabbed it out of his hand. She typed in her phone number and hit send. As soon as the call connected, she hung up.

"There you go. Now you just have to hit redial." She smiled as she handed the phone back to him.

"OK. I'll call you. I can't tell you how glad I am that I ran into you tonight Olivia." He leaned over, grabbed her hand and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Olivia turned around and walked back over to the table.

Elliot watched the interaction between them, and scowled when he saw Olivia type into his phone. Her phone was sitting at the table and it rang once and stopped, so he knew she had given him her number. Now he was kicking himself for pushing her into having a drink. He should have let her go home like she wanted.

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW IF I SHOULD CONTINUE WITH THIS STORY.


	2. Chapter 2

_These characters do not belong to me. They belong to Dick Wolf. E/O forever._

**EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO**

As Olivia walked over to the table, she looked at Elliot. He wasn't looking at her, but she could sense a change in his mood. She sighed. She was genuinely happy to see Matt. They had dated her sophomore year in college and it was pretty serious. He was a senior, majoring in music. He was in a band, even then, and it was fun to hang with the band, to be the girlfriend of the lead singer. She had even sung with them a few times, which was something her friends at SVU NEVER needed to know about. When Matt said she was a wild child, he wasn't far off. All of the boundaries that her mother had placed on her early in life were gone; she was living on campus and went a little wild with all the freedom. She had let loose, partying and dating lots of different guys, experimenting in lots of areas. She was always game to try stuff, except for hard drugs and hard alcohol. An alcoholic mother kept her away from that. But then Matt graduated, and the band was going to tour around the U.S. Literally get on a bus, try to get gigs in whatever town they landed in. And he wanted her to go with him. It sounded fantastic and exciting and at the time, she really thought she was in love with Matt. But by the end of her sophomore year, she had grown up enough to know that she wanted more. She wanted to finish college and make a difference in the world. So she let go of Matt. They both cried when she told him and her remembered thinking that she had never seen a grown man cry before. They wrote letters exchanged for a while, but since he never knew where he was going to be…it got harder and harder until it just stopped. And slowly, Olivia got over him, certain that she had made the right choice.

Thinking back over that year with Matt though…it was an amazing year.

"Earth to Liv" said Casey. Olivia looked up, not realizing she had reached the table and was standing there, lost in her thoughts.

"Who IS that guy?" asked Casey, grabbing Olivia's arm and pulling her into the booth next to her. "Spill. Did you sleep with him? He is so sexy. I want to hear all the details…"

Olivia smiled a secretive smile. "Casey. There is nothing to tell."

"Bull" said Casey. "I see that smirk on your face."

"I want to hear the details of some of the trouble you got into" said Munch. "You always seem like this perfect badass crime fighter, but I KNEW you had a dark side!"

"C'mon baby girl. Tell us one story. Something that you did in college that we would never expect." Said Fin.

Olivia sighed, sorting through stories of all of the things she did in college, rejecting most of them. Sometimes there were things you just didn't need your friends to know about.

"Well. I was in a sorority." She offered.

"Boring." Said Casey. "Tell us something good."

Olivia looked over at Elliot, who was not involved in the conversation. He just looked down into his beer as she spoke.

"OK. Well, Matt had an amazing band and they played at local bars near campus all the time."

"And you slept with each of the band members." Said Chester.

"Chester!" said Casey, punching him in the arm. "That's horrible." Then she looked over at Olivia. "Unless that's what you were going to tell us."

"Casey!" said Olivia. "I did NOT sleep with all of the band members."

"But I DID sing with the band sometimes." She said quickly and then took a swig of her beer.

"What?" said Fin. "I didn't know you could sing Liv."

"Well, it's not exactly something that comes up a lot in our jobs! And I didn't say I could sing well…I was just OK. But being the lead singer's girlfriend gave me some perks."

"Sing something for us" said Chester.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "I am NOT going to sing. Don't make me sorry I told you that."

"I think you just told us that to keep from having to give us any juicy details." said Casey. "But don't worry; you and I are going to talk privately later."

Olivia's phone vibrated near Elliot's elbow. He looked down at it and then over at her. "Unknown number" Elliot said. He didn't pick it up but instead stared at her, as if daring her to pick up the phone.

The look Elliot was giving Olivia was not lost on the squad. They could see Elliot was in overprotective mode; they knew better than to say anything. They heard a chirp from her phone, signaling that someone had left a message.

"Let's just please change the topic. I am not going to give you guys any dirt about my college life unless you are willing to share your stories!" said Olivia.

"OK" said Fin. "Let's play Truth or Dare"

Everyone groaned. "We are NOT going to play Truth or Dare" said Munch. "That will lead to nothing but trouble." Everyone laughed.

Olivia was laughing along with them, but secretly, she was dying to know if it was Matt that had left the message. She was certain it was; there was really no one else that it could be.

"Um, I'm going to go to the bathroom" said Olivia.

Elliot looked up at her. "You just went." He grumbled.

"Are you the bathroom police? I had several beers and I have to go." Olivia said sharply.

"I'll come with you." Said Casey.

They both slid out of their spots in the booth, and as Olivia got up, she grabbed her phone, and they headed off to the bathroom. She slipped her phone into her pocket until they reached the bathroom. As soon as she shut the door of her stall, she pulled the phone out and pushed the button for her voicemail.

"Olivia? This is Matt. It was really good to see you again. I know I said I would call you sometime, but, well, is this too soon? I really want to catch up with you and I thought maybe you would meet me for a late bit tonight? Just text me or call me."

Olivia smiled. She felt giddy, like a high school girl that had been asked out for the first time. She looked at the time. It was 930PM. She quickly opened her text messaging and drafted a message. "I was really surprised to see you tonight, and I would love to meet you for a late bit. It's going to take a bit to slip away from my friends. How about 1030 at Nate's Diner on 7th Ave and 26th St? I will meet you there." She hit send, butterflies in her stomach.

It took less than 30 seconds to get a reply. "See you there!" Olivia got a big smile on her face. Now all she had to do was get away without anyone noticing. And she knew that was going to be difficult with Elliot watching her like a hawk.

When she came out of the stall, Casey was standing there waiting for her. Dang, she had forgotten about her.

"What's the smile about?" said Casey. "What that message from Matt?"

Olivia knew that Casey would be able to read right through her, so she decided she couldn't lie; she would just amend the story a little.

"Yeah. He just said it was great to see me and that he hoped we could get together for a coffee sometime."

"Hmm." Said Casey. "I hope you'll take him up on that offer. And if you don't want to, then give him MY number!" she said, laughing as they made their way back to the table.

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Elliot was watching Olivia when she got back to the table. She was acting strangely, like she was on edge. He looked around, but didn't see that Matt guy anywhere near. He was certain that he was the one that had left the message, but there wasn't anything he could do about that.

About ten minutes later, Olivia stretched and put her hand over her mouth. "Well, I think I'm going to call it a night." She said.

Casey frowned, looking at her watch. "Liv. it's only 10:00."

"Hey, I am the one that said I didn't want to go out tonight. AND, I've had four beers, which is way over my limit. I need to get home and go to bed."

Elliot looked up. "I'll give you a ride Liv. I'm ready to go too." He said, getting up from the table.

Olivia froze. She knew there was no way she was going to get out of Elliot giving her a ride without raising suspicion. She didn't know why she felt like she had to keep this rendezvous with Matt a secret, but at this point, she thought it best. It was so hard to keep her personal life..well, personal. Everyone knew too much about everybody. She wanted to keep this to herself for now. She would just have to let Elliot take her home, and then she would catch a cab to meet Matt. Besides it would give her a chance to freshen up before she met him.

"OK El. Let's go" she said. "Bye guys. See you Monday!" she waved as she walked off with Elliot.

_**Please REVIEW and let me know if I should continue! I appreciate it.**_

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW AND LET ME KNOW IF I SHOULD CONTINUE WITH THIS STORY.


	3. Chapter 3

_These characters do not belong to me. They belong to Dick Wolf. E/O forever._

Elliot and Olivia walked to Elliot's car, neither one of them saying too much. When they reached the car, Elliot unlocked the doors and Olivia climbed inside. She looked over at Elliot as he buckled his seatbelt.

"Are you sure you're OK to drive?" asked Olivia.

"Yeah." he said, starting the car. He slowly pulled away from the curb and started the drive towards Olivia's apartment. They ride was quiet, and Olivia knew Elliot was upset, but frankly, she didn't want to hear about it. Sometimes it was kind of flattering when Elliot went into overprotective mode, but that was when she entertained the idea that he might have some feelings for her; that they might become something more than partners. Now it just ticked her off.

"So, are you going to tell me about this Matt guy?" he finally asked as they stopped at a stoplight.

Olivia looked over at him, and could see that he was still staring straight ahead, his hands gripping the steering wheel.

"What's to tell? I dated him in college. We broke up when he graduated. End of story." Said Olivia, downplaying the depth of the relationship.

"Seems like you were close. He couldn't keep his hands off of you."

Olivia sighed. Talk about exaggeration.

"El, he didn't have his hands all over me. We hugged. I haven't seen him in a long time. I shouldn't hug an old friend?"

Elliot was quiet again. He knew he was being a jerk, but for some reason, he couldn't stop himself. He couldn't stop seeing that guy with Olivia in his arms, and his mind wandered as imagined him with his hands all over her, kissing her, making love with her and it made him angry.

"Why did the two you break up?" he asked. He hoped she was the one that had broken it off with him.

"Matt graduated. He's two years older than me. He was going away, going on tour with the band…" Olivia paused as she thought about how she wanted to finish that sentence. "I needed to stay and finish college."

Elliot wanted to ask her if she was going to see him, but he didn't. If he didn't ask her…if he didn't know… then he didn't have to think about it.

They pulled up in front of her apartment building.

"Thanks for the ride El." She said, as she unbuckled her seatbelt. "Have fun with the kids this weekend."

She opened the car door. Elliot reached out and placed a hand on her arm, stopping her. "Liv."

She turned back towards him. "Yeah?"

Elliot shook his head. "Nothing. Have a good weekend. I'll pick you up Monday morning. 7AM?"

"Sounds good Elliot. Say hi to the kids." Olivia got out of the car and shut the door, heading to the door of her apartment building.

Elliot sat there for a minute and watched her go. He knew he was overanalyzing, but he had watched Olivia when she was talking to Matt. She seemed so much "lighter". Her smile was wide and her eyes were bright. He could see Olivia as a young woman, before the darkness and strain of their job had settled over her. She always had the most amazing smile, and he lived for the times when he could bring that smile to her lips. As he watched her with Matt, he realized that he represented a time in her life where she was carefree, and life was fun. Who doesn't want to relive those days at some point in their life?

He slowly pulled away from the curb and forced himself to try to stop thinking about her. His thoughts of Olivia always led him to a lot of 'what if's?'. What if he told her how he felt? What if he pulled her to him and kissed her, as he had wanted to do for as long as he could remember? What if she felt the same way, and kissed him back? What if she allowed him to run his hands over her body, removing her clothes…

He was getting himself worked up and he feel himself starting to get aroused just thinking about a naked Olivia Benson in his bed. He shook his head, trying to clear his mind of the images. "Get a grip Stabler" he said out loud, heading his car back to his apartment.

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Olivia ran up the stairs to her apartment, looking at her watch. Damn, it was 10:15 already. She really wanted to jump in the shower and wash the grime of the day from her body. When she reached her apartment, she pulled out her phone. She sent a quick text to Matt.

Had to make a quick stop at home. I probably won't be there until closer to 11. Sorry. Wait for me?

She ran into her room, stripped of her clothes and jumped into the shower. She didn't have time to do her hair, so she made sure she didn't get her hair wet. She was in and out quickly, drying off and rushing back into her bedroom. She started digging in her drawers, looking for some underwear. She started to look through her options, finding herself picking a sexy black lace bra and thong. As she held them in her hand, she felt her face flush. What was she doing? Picking sexy lingerie? What did she think was going to happen? She shook her head and started to put them back into the drawer. She bit her lower lip and pulled them back out. "What the hell" she thought to herself, as she pulled the thong over her legs. She had a small smile on her face. She went to her closet, considering what she should wear. In the end, she decided she didn't want to look like she was trying too hard, so she picked another pair of jeans and a light blue sweater with a slightly plunging V-neck. As she pulled it over her head, she thought about the fact that this was Elliot's favorite sweater. He hadn't told her so, but she always caught him staring at her a little more when she wore it, and she always loved his reaction when he first saw her on the mornings she wore it. "How messed up is that?" she thought as she straightened out the sweater. I am wearing a sweater that Elliot loves to meet another man. But she knew she was wearing it BECAUSE of Elliot's reaction. She was hoping Matt would have the same reaction.

She touched up her make-up and her hair, grabbed her keys and things and rushed out the door, looking at her watch once again. It was 10:30. She checked her phone, and saw she had a message from Matt.

"NP. I will be here." It said. She smiled, as she walked out of her apartment building, hoping she could find a cab quickly. As luck would have it, there was a cab just a block away. She jumped in, gave the cabbie the address and settled back in the seat. She didn't know why she was so nervous; so excited. Seeing Matt had unleashed a flood of memories. Their relationship was intense; passionate. Olivia had slept with several guys before Matt, but everything with Matt was different. He adored her and Olivia had never felt so loved in her life to that point. As a musician, Matt was sensitive and romantic, and he made her the focus of his passion. He made her feel so alive. And the sex. Oh my God, she blushed thinking about it. They couldn't get enough of each other. A kiss and a look from him was all it took to ignite the passion in her; his touch went right to her core, and they had sex often and in some really interesting places. As the memories ran through her mind, she realized that she was getting herself worked up, as evidenced by the dampness pooling between her legs. Olivia leaned her head back against the seat and sighed deeply. "Get a grip Benson." She told herself as the cab pulled up to the diner.

She paid the cabdriver, and hopped out of the cab. She took a deep breath and walked into the diner, looking for Matt as she wandered in. She saw him sitting in a booth to the far right. As she spotted him, he raised an arm and smiled. She walked over towards him, and he stood up to greet her. When she reached the booth, he stepped in and gave her a big hug, and kissed her cheek.

"It's good to see you." He said with a big smile. Olivia smiled back and slid into the booth as he did the same.

"Thanks for waiting for me." She said. "It took a while to get out of the bar and then I got dropped off at home and decided to quickly change…"

Matt interrupted her. "It's fine Olivia. Relax. I wouldn't have waited an hour if you asked me. I'm just glad you agreed to meet me on such short notice."

Olivia couldn't stop smiling. "Of course. I was hoping you would call and that we would have a chance to catch up." Listening to herself, she hoped she didn't sound too pathetic. He must think she never got out!

Just then, the waitress stopped by. "Can I get you something to drink?" she asked Olivia. Olivia looked over to see Matt was drinking coffee. "I'll have tea, if you have it." She said.

"Sure thing." Said the waitress. "Are you two going to order any food?"

"Um.." Olivia looked over at Matt.

"Tell you what" said Matt to the waitress. "We're going to be here for a while. So just keep refilling the coffee and tea, and if we want some food, we will flag you down. Does that sound OK?" he said with a charming smile.

The waitress got a big smile on her face, liking the flirtatious way Matt was asking. "Sounds good to me."

As the waitress walked away, Olivia shook her head and smiled at Matt. "You always were a charmer. Nice to see you haven't lost your touch."

Matt laughed. "What? Me?" he feigned innocence. "I didn't do anything."

"Ah ha." Said Olivia, laughing lightly. The waitress brought Olivia her tea, gave Matt a look and walked away.

Olivia looked over at Matt. He had a big smile on his face, and he was shaking his head. "I always loved to hear your laugh, and to see your smile. It lights up the place. And hearing it now takes me back…" he reached over and grasped her right hand with his.

"The last time I saw you, you were standing on the steps of the sorority house, trying to look brave. You were wearing jeans and that big white sweater, and you looked so amazingly beautiful but I could see the tears in your eyes. That picture of you is seared in my brain…and as we drove away I felt like I was such an idiot. I almost made them stop the car and let me out. You don't know how hard it was for me to leave you…"

Olivia smiled at his honesty and at the memory. She remembers that day as well.

"Yeah." She said quietly, looking down at their clasped hands. "I remember it too. I questioned my decision to stay as well, but it was what I needed to do. I grew up a lot in the year we were together, and that gave me the strength to stay and do what I had to do. I guess I always thought that if we were meant to be together, we would find each other again."

"And here we are." Matt said. Olivia looked back up at Matt when he said that.

"Yeah." She said. There was an awkward silence then. She hadn't meant it like that. She had meant after she graduated, or something like that. But when Matt said it, she felt a nervous drop in her stomach.

"So." Said Matt, trying to lighten the mood. "Tell me EVERYTHING that's happened since the day I left you on those steps and drove away."

Olivia gave him an incredulous look. "Seriously? We don't have that much time!" she laughed.

He leaned back in the booth, and picked up his cup of coffee. "I have all night, and I can't think of anyplace I'd rather be."

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	4. Chapter 4

_These characters do not belong to me. They belong to Dick Wolf. E/O forever._

Olivia started to tell him about her last few years at college, telling him about her decision to go into police work.

"That really surprises me Olivia. When I left, you were going into psychology and I think you had a real knack for that. When did you decide to change that and become a cop?" Matt said.

"I took a criminology class and I really liked it. And you know that I was really interested in counseling people that were victims of family violence and sexual assault…you know, with my background and everything." Matt knew all about her mother and about Olivia being the product of a stranger rape. "So when I did some research, I found that there was a way I could do both. I mean, help victims. So after college, I went to the police academy, and got hired by the NYPD. I worked as a uni, and when I made detective, I put in to work at the Special Victim's Unit. I was lucky enough to get it, lucky enough to have a great team of detectives to show me the ropes and get through the first year. That first year was tough. The things you see…" Olivia shook her head.

"And your partner?" Matt said.

"What about him?" said Olivia, avoiding his eyes.

"How long have you been partners with him?"

"He has been my partner for the entire 8 years I have been in SVU." Olivia said, looking back up at Matt. She felt like she owed him an explanation after his questions from earlier in the evening. "Elliot is my best friend. When you see the things we see every day…well, you can't share that with other people. It's just too horrific. So we really depend on each other. You have to rely on your partner for everything. We have each other's backs. And we spend so much time together every day. You just get…close." She shrugged her shoulders.

"Hmm." Said Matt, sensing there was more by the way Olivia wouldn't meet his eyes when she talked about him. But he let it go.

"So what else? You told me about college and you job. What about your personal life? I don't see a ring. Did you get married? Do you have kids? Or wasn't there anyone that could compare to me?" he chuckled.

Olivia laughed. "Are you kidding me? I had a date the night after you left!"

Matt looked surprised, not used to her sense of humor.

"I'm just kidding." Olivia said quickly. "No. After you left, I really just focused on school. I dated a few guys, but nothing really lasted. And once I got into the academy and started working on the force. Well, it just took a lot of time. I mean, I've dated. But really, the job takes its' toll. Most men don't like that I'm a cop; lots of guys don't like a strong woman. And the ones that are OK with that…well…you add in the Special Victims part, and they are either turned off by it, or way too into it, if you know what I mean. And the hours suck. It's not uncommon to work 12 hours, and then get called in at 2AM. Pervs don't keep office hours. I can't tell you how many dates I've had to cancel. After a while, it's just easier not to date."

Matt shook his head. "Olivia, that's insane. You're a beautiful woman, so smart and sexy. I can't believe you haven't found someone that can appreciate you after all this time."

"Yeah, well…" Olivia said, as an image of Elliot popped into her head. Maybe her damn problem is that no one measured up to Elliot, she thought. She pushed that thought out of her head. Elliot hadn't made a move; she obviously had seen something that wasn't there. And she was sitting across from an incredibly sexy guy; one that had a history with. He knew all of the skeletons in her closet-at least those from her youth.

"Olivia" Matt said, startling her and making her realize she had been lost in thought. "Is everything OK?"

She smiled and reached for his hand. "Yes, everything's fine. It's just been a long day."

"Sorry-I guess you worked all day. I didn't think about that. Do you want to call it a night?"

"No!" Olivia said with more force than she expected. "I'm fine. I'm not ready to leave."

"I am glad to hear you say that." Said Matt. "Let's order something to eat, and keep talking, and then maybe we can walk. Get some fresh air. So what else do I need to know about you?"

"I don't want to talk about me. I want to hear about you! About the band. And everywhere you've been." Said Olivia. "See what I missed out on."

"Well, it all sounds very glamorous, but really, it's a lot of the same. We've had some moderate success. We've been lucky to have a good fan base, and haven't had a lot of trouble booking gigs. I have also done some songwriting for other artists, so that helps pay the bills too. After we left New York, we wandered east to Philly, then to Detroit, Chicago, Minneapolis. We met lots of people, other bands. That helped us get some engagements. It's all who you know. We ended up spending the past year in Boston. And that was really good, but we all wanted to head back here. We feel like we have enough cred now to get some jobs here."

"So when did you get back and where are you living?" said Olivia.

"We rented an old house over in Brooklyn. Not a place I'd want to take a woman…" he looked at Olivia and smiled. "I can't afford to live here in Manhattan. I didn't know cops made so much money!"

Olivia laughed. "Sometimes I don't even know why I HAVE an apartment. I am barely ever there. And it's a small apartment; nothing spectacular. Maybe I'll invite you over some time." As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she regretted them. She sounded so desperate!

Matt smiled. "I would like that."

Olivia felt awkward, but just then, the waitress stopped by to see if they wanted to order something to eat. "Yes!" they both said in unison, and that broke the tension of the moment.

They both ordered soup and sandwiches and then settled back in the booth.

'Remember when we met?" asked Matt. Olivia nodded, thinking about that night. She had been asked to a party by one of the other members of the band, and had gone with a couple of girlfriends. Once she and Matt had met each other at the party, there had been an instant connection and they spent the entire party talking to each other. They made plans for the next day before her girlfriends dragged her back home.

"Jeff was so pissed at me, telling me he had seen you first!" he said. "But he got over it."

"I was so excited to see you the next day, I barely slept at all" said Olivia. "Then it's all kind of a blur. I feel like were together ALL the time. I barely remember going to class or studying!"

"Oh, you studied. Don't you remember going to the library together? Remember what we did in the study corrals? He smiled wickedly.

Olivia blushed because she did remember. The chemistry between them had been amazing, and it was only a few weeks before they had sex for the first time. It was amazing…and after that, they couldn't keep their hands off each other. There weren't a lot of places for privacy, as Olivia lived in the sorority house and Matt shared a house with 8 guys. Desperate times caused them to hook up in some pretty strange places. And, if they were honest with themselves, they loved the rush it brought, heightening the high.

"Yes, I remember. You were insatiable." Olivia said.

"Me? I think I remember you jumping me on several occasions." Matt said.

Olivia laughed again. "Let's just say it was a tie. Does it really matter? That's past history."

The waitress interrupted with their food, and the both dug in.

"Do you still sing Olivia?" Matt asked, after taking a spoonful of soup. "It was fun when you sung with the band."

"NO! I never could sing. I think you were delusional about my singing capability." Said Olivia, shaking her head.

"I might have been a little biased, but you were pretty good. You should have stuck with it."

Olivia rolled her eyes. "That's not going to happen. I already told my squad about it and they are never going to let me forget it. I can just hear it now."

"Maybe you can come watch the band, and sing a song or two with us."

"Matt, look at me." Said Olivia, a serious expression on her face. "That is NOT going to happen. I mean, I would love to come here the band, but I will NOT be singing."

They finished up their meal, bringing up more memories of their college days, laughing and talking over each other. Suddenly, Olivia heard her phone ringing. She groaned because it was Cragen's ring tone. She pulled the phone out of her back pocket, and answered it. "Benson"

There was quiet while Olivia listened to her Captain. "Got it. Did you already call Elliot? Oh…OK."

Olivia hung up the phone. "Sorry Matt. Duty calls. I have a rape victim over at Mercy General. I have to go."

"Right now?" said Matt.

"Yeah. Right now. Hold on a second, I have to call Elliot." She hit #1 on speed dial.

"El." said Olivia. "Yes, Mercy General." She paused. "Um, I will meet you there." She looked over at Matt. "I know it's on your way, but…" Olivia paused, listening to the voice on the other end. "El..stop. I'm not at home. I will meet you there." There was more silence as she listened. "None of your business. I said I will meet you there." She ended the call and sighed.

Matt raised his eyebrows questioningly. "Problems?"

"No. Elliot was just going to pick me up on his way to Mercy, so…"

"You didn't tell him that you were meeting me tonight, did you?" Matt asked.

Olivia blew some air out through her pursed lips. "No."

"Why do I feel like I have stepped into something here?" Matt asked.

"Matt. Just..there is nothing between Elliot and me. We're close because we're partners and best friends. But that is the extent of our personal relationship. Elliot has just always been very overprotective of me." Olivia looked at Matt.

"I'm sorry, but I really have to get going." Olivia started to slide out of the booth, grabbing her things.

"OK." Matt stood up. "Olivia, I had a great time catching up. Would it be OK if I called you again? Maybe we can go out to dinner or something?"

"I would love that." Olivia smiled. "I really would." She leaned in and gave Matt a kiss on the right check. And then she was out the door.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOE

Elliot threw down his phone after Olivia hung up on him. She wasn't at home? Where the hell was she? It was 4AM. He had dropped her off at her apartment. He'd seen her go in. What the hell was going on? He hit the gas and raced towards the hospital, anxious to get answers to his questions.

When he got into the ER, Olivia was already there, talking to the doctor. The doctor was filling her in after examining the victim. Elliot came walking up, and Liv held up her hand as if to tell him to hold on.

The doctor finished up what he was telling Olivia and then left and headed back down the hall.

"Liv. What the hell. Where were you?" Elliot asked.

"El, not now. We have a victim here and that is our priority." Olivia said as she started to walk into the room where their victim was waiting. Elliot followed her in, knowing he would have to table this discussion for later.

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	5. Chapter 5

Olivia and Elliot spent the next several hours talking to the victim, and visiting the crime scene. Olivia did her job, but tried to keep her distance from Elliot. She was so exhausted, and she wasn't in the mood to answer a bunch of questions. Even though it was none of his business, she felt guilty for meeting up with Matt and not telling him. And that was so messed up on so many levels. And she was just too tired to deal with it.

When they had wrapped things up, Elliot walked over. "Let's get back to the house." He said, walking over to the sedan. Olivia sighed. She was absolutely exhausted and just wanted to go home. But she knew that wasn't an option. They had to get back to the 1-6 and go over the case details.

They both climbed in the car and Elliot pulled away from the crime scene. Traffic was light since it was still early on a Saturday morning. Olivia laid her head back on the seat and closed her eyes. She was sleeping in a minute.

Elliot parked at the station and turned off the car. He looked over at Olivia and saw that she was sleeping. He sighed. Where the hell had she been tonight? He knew the answer, but he didn't want to acknowledge it. Would she really have gone home, and then gone back out? And why would she keep it a secret from him? He scrubbed his hands over his face. He knew why she didn't tell him. Because he would have given her a hard time about it. He laid his head back against the headrest of the car and closed his eyes. Why was this so difficult? He loved Olivia. He had loved her for as long as he could remember. And now he was divorced; he was free to act on his desires. But something was stopping him. And he couldn't sort out why. He thought back to what Olivia always said. It was complicated. Part of it was that he knew they wouldn't be able to be partners any more, and he couldn't imagine not working with her by his side. He didn't want anyone else watching her back. He also thought about his family. Kathy had always been so certain that they were having an affair. If he started up with Olivia now, would she ever believe that they hadn't been? But fuck! Did he really care what Kathy thought? He knew in his heart that he had been faithful; he may have cheated mentally and emotionally, but never physically. God, he couldn't believe he was actually taking time to consider the difference. He looked over at Olivia again. She was so beautiful, inside and outside. He loved every little thing about her. He couldn't wait to see her every morning, and she was the last person he wanted to talk to at night. Now that he was a bachelor, they spent even more time together, watching movies and eating bad Chinese food. The only thing they hadn't done was crossed that line. That line they had drawn so long ago. They had tiptoed up to the line, flirting with each other and bantering back and forth playfully. The lingering looks…sometimes he couldn't stop staring at her across their desks. And he swore it was mutual. Maybe he should lean over, just kiss her gently…

He started to lean over and got stopped by his seatbelt. He groaned out loud. Olivia stirred in her sleep but didn't wake up. Elliot released the seatbelt and it slapped back. Olivia startled awake. She turned and saw Elliot leaning over towards her.

"Elliot?" she said, looking around. "What's going on?" Despite the short nap, she was having a hard time waking up and was disoriented.

"We're at the house. I was just going to wake you." Elliot said as he leaned back in his seat. "You ready to go?"

Olivia sighed, rubbing her eyes. She leaned her head back against the seat again. "I'm so tired El."

"Maybe you should get some sleep at night instead of going out." Said Elliot said sharply. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he regretted it.

Olivia didn't say anything.

"Are you going to tell me where you were tonight?" Elliot asked in a more even tone, looking back over at her.

Olivia continued to stare straight ahead, out the windshield.

She took a deep breath. "After you dropped me off, I caught a cab and met Matt for coffee and a late dinner. We got talking and before I knew it, it was 4AM, and Cragen was calling me."

"So you came from the diner?" asked Elliot, looking at her skeptically.

"Yeah El." hearing the insinuation in his voice. "We were at the diner. We just had a lot to catch up on."

Elliot pondered this. "Did you know that you were going to meet him when we left the bar?"

Olivia blew out a breath through her pursed lips and rubbed her temple. "Yes."

"And you didn't feel like you couldn't tell me that? You had me take you all the way home and then you went back out?"

Olivia sighed. "I just…" she stopped.

"What?" said Elliot.

"I can't have this conversation right now." She opened the car door and slammed it shut behind her, walking quickly towards the station door. Elliot jumped out of the car and tried to catch up to her.

"Liv. Wait." But Olivia forged ahead, making it into the station house and over to the elevators before Elliot caught up with her. The doors opened and she went in, with Elliot on her heels. She leaned against that back wall, and leaned her head back and closed her eyes.

Elliot stood next to her. "Just talk to me. Tell me why you did that."

Olivia groaned. "God, just drop it Elliot. I told you I don't want to talk about it right now. I haven't slept in 26 hours and I'm just not up for this conversation right now. And I swear to God, if you push me right now.." As she was talking, the elevator doors opened, saving her from finishing that sentence. She rushed out of the elevators and started towards the cribs. She had to get some distance between her and Elliot. She turned around and saw Elliot right behind her.

She held up her hand. "Do NOT follow me."

Elliot stopped and let her go, watching her as she walked up the stairs to the cribs. Shaking his head, he walked back to his desk and plopped down in his chair. He let out a heavy sign and leaned on his desk, putting his head in his hands. He was such an idiot. He should have told Olivia how he felt as soon as his divorce was final. He should have laid it all on the line. The worst that could have happened was that she would have told him that she didn't feel the same way; didn't want more. But he was pretty certain that she wouldn't have said that. And now he had blown it. He didn't tell her a damn thing; didn't step over that line they had drawn, despite being a free man. He knew that Olivia would never have done anything while he was still married. And he would never let her be the other woman. But when he didn't say anything or do anything after his divorce, it must have confused the hell out of her. She probably blamed herself, thinking she was seeing things that weren't there. She had given up on him.

He shook his head, trying to make sense of this mess he had created. Now a chance meeting with an old flame blew everything out of the water. It was pretty clear there had been some chemistry between the two. She had gone to meet him, just hours after running into him. And she had lied about it. Had she lied because she didn't want him to be jealous? Still hoping he would come to his senses? Or had she lied because he didn't want him to get in the way and sabotage a possible rematch with Matt before it even began?

He had to go talk to her. He pushed his chair away from his desk and started to make his way towards the cribs when his phone rang. Damn! He walked back over to his desk and grabbed his phone. "Stabler" he said, not bothering to look at the caller ID. He heard his ex-wife on the other side, asking him where the hell he was. He looked at his watch and saw that it was 8AM, and he was supposed to have met Kathy at Dick's baseball game. Damnit, he thought to himself. Kathy was constantly busting his balls about missing these kinds of things, and now he had to make sure he didn't mess up and lose his shared custody of his kids. "Kathy, I caught a case this morning, but I'm on my way now. I will be there in 30 minutes." He hung up the phone and looked up the stairs towards the cribs. He wanted to say something to Olivia, but now he didn't have time now. He knew it was probably going to take longer than 30 minutes to get to the game so he was already screwed.

He wrote a quick note to her, explaining why he had to leave. "Liv-had to run to Dick's ball game. Sorry-I will call later-El" He rushed out of the station and jumped in his car, heading towards Queens.

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	6. Chapter 6

Olivia made her way up to the cribs, happy that Elliot had finally listened to her and hadn't followed her up. She couldn't handle him right now. She sat down on the edge of the one of the bunks, propped her elbows on her knees and sunk her head into her hands. She had loved Elliot for so long, she couldn't remember a time when she didn't. Their lives seemed so intertwined; and sometimes it felt like they couldn't go forward, and they couldn't go back. They had been in that space for the last several years, forced to honor boundaries and put up walls because he was a married man. Neither one of them would cross that line; it was an unspoken rule. She tamped down her feelings, trying to convince herself she didn't feel more than what was appropriate. She knew he struggled with the same demons she did. But then he said the magical words. Divorce. She tried to be sympathetic, but inside, she felt hopeful. And guilty because that was horrible! But in the ensuing months since the divorce, they were still stuck in the same place. It would require one of them to force a change; to change the direction of their relationship. And she had left that to Elliot, as he had the more complicated life with children and an ex-wife. Olivia kept making excuses as to why he hadn't move things forward; not wanting to think it was because he didn't feel the same way she did. But it had been months…

So when she ran into Matt yesterday, it was like someone was trying to tell her something. Time to move on. Matt was the first person she had loved-or thought she had loved. It was different than how she felt about Elliot, but she had been young. What did she know? And it had been great reconnecting with Matt last night. Or rather, this morning. That seemed like so long ago! She knew that it was just a few hours (5, but who was counting?) but it felt so natural to be with him. It had always been like that with him. Easy. The polar opposite of her relationship with Elliot. She could see herself falling back in love with him (do you ever stop loving your first real love?).

She lay down on the bunk, and laid one arm over her eyes. She was so tired. She wished she could go to sleep, but she knew she needed to get back downstairs. They had a case to work. She and Elliot had to put this shit aside, and focus on that. She would march down there and tell him that; try to keep him focused on the case, and avoid any more personal conversations until later. And then avoid him when later came.

She sat up slowly, and walked over to the bathroom. She splashed some cold water on her face and looked in the mirror. She looked horrible. Most of her make-up was gone and her hair was a mess. She tried to smooth down her hair, but gave up. She walked over to her locker and found a binder, whipping her hair up into a messy ponytail. She took a deep breath, and steeled herself to deal with Elliot. As she walked down the stairs from the cribs, she looked around the squad room, and didn't see him down there. It was quiet on a Saturday morning. She got to her desk and sunk down in her chair, and then saw the note from Elliot. Of course, she had forgotten that he had his kids this weekend. He wasn't on call with her and Cragen shouldn't have called him in. She sighed with relief.

She looked up at the board, and saw that Fin was on call. She picked up her phone and hit #2 on speed dial, calling Fin to come in and help her with the case. Olivia started at the board, jotting down the pertinent facts of the case and starting to look at options for next steps.

Fin arrived 45 minutes later, and looked at Olivia. She looked absolutely exhausted. Fin started to say something but Olivia shot him a dark look, and he dropped it. He knew Olivia well, and he knew when to back off.

"So, fill me in" he said. Olivia said a silent thank you in her head and started to brief Fin on the pertinent facts.

When she was done, she sat back down in her chair and put her head in her hands.

"Liv. You know what? I'm going to call Munch. You need to go home." Fin said.

"No!" said Liv. "I can do my job."

"C'mon. I can see you're exhausted. And Munch is just sitting around doing 'nuthin. I'm sure he can do you a solid. Not like you've never done anything for him." Fin picked up the phone and dialed Munch's number before Olivia could protest any further.

"Munch. Fin. Whatcha doin'?" said Fin. "Well, Liv needs to go home so get your bony ass in here and help me with this case." There was a short silence while Fin listened to Munch on the other end.

Fin looked at Olivia. "He said he'll be here in 30. Now go home."

Olivia didn't want to give in to Fin, but she was so exhausted she honestly didn't think she could stay awake if she tried. There had been plenty of times in the past where they we're up for long periods of time, but for some reason, she just couldn't find enough energy to plow through.

"Thanks Fin. Tell John I owe him." She stood up, grabbed her things and headed for the door. "Call me if you have any questions as you go through the notes."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOE

Elliot arrived at Dick's baseball game in the middle of the 7th inning. Kathy shot him a dirty look when he sat down beside her, and he sighed heavily. He rubbed his temples. "Sorry."

"I thought you told me that you weren't going to be on call on the weekends you have the kids?" she said.

"Yeah, I know. I'm not. It's just new…and Liv is on call. So Cragen just automatically called me too. It was 4AM, so I just went, since I didn't have the kids yet. But don't worry, she'll call in Fin. I've got the kids. We're good. Next time, I will just remind him."

Kathy sighed and looked at Elliot for another few seconds before turning away. "OK." She said, deciding not to push it any further.

Elliot was glad that Kathy dropped it. He really wasn't in the mood to get into it with her. He turned to watch the game, and then felt his phone vibrate.

He pulled it out of his pocket, and looked at the screen. It was from Olivia. He caught Kathy watching him out of the corner of his eye, and knew she was ready to pounce on him if it was work related.

"Text from Olivia?" she asked.

Elliot sighed. " Yeah."

"Of course it is." She said, turning back to the game.

Elliot sighed and put his phone back in his pocket. As much as he wanted to see what the text said, he knew he was on probation with Kathy. She felt like the divorce was more his fault, then hers, even if she denied it. The two things that she constantly threw in his face were that he was gone from home too much, and to compound that, when he was gone, he was with Olivia. They had fought over Olivia numerous times; she was convinced they were having an affair and/or that he was in love with her. He vehemently denied it, and he thinks she believed him when he said there wasn't anything physical going on between them. But when she asked him to switch partners; to do that for her, he refused. He told her it was because he and Olivia worked so well together; they were so effective in their jobs and he wasn't going to sacrifice victims so that his wife was happy. But deep down, he thinks she knows. He can't give her up because it would kill him.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOE

Olivia made it home, dropping everything on the kitchen counter. She walked into the bedroom, and put away her badge and gun, and stripping off her clothes. She crawled into bed and pulled the covers up, and was sleeping within minutes.

When she awoke, it was dark in her room. She rolled over, groaning, and turned on the light by the bed. She looked for her cell phone, but it wasn't there. She swung her legs out of bed, and grabbed some sweats and a t-shirt. Once dressed, she walked back into the kitchen, and snagged her phone off the counter. Her phone screen lit up, telling her it was 9PM and that she had 5 texts and 1 voicemail. She couldn't believe she had slept that long! How could it be 9:00 already?

She opened up her text messages. She saw a return message from Elliot. She had texted him to tell him that Fin and Munch were working on the case and that she was going home. He had replied "Thx for update. Call me."

There were four messages from Matt.

12:06PM "It was great to catch up last night. Hope you didn't have to work too late today. See you soon."

2:32PM "Was wondering if you wanted to spend some time together Sunday afternoon. Central Park?"

6:03PM "Haven't heard back. If you're busy, I get it. Just let me know.

8:40PM "Going out so may be slow to respond, but are we on for tomorrow?"

Olivia smiled. Poor guy. He probably thought she wasn't responding because she didn't want to go. She quickly replied to his last message. "Would love to go. What time?"

She laughed as she got a response back right away. So much for being slow to respond. "Meet me at Columbus Circle. 1?"

She texted back "Sounds perfect. See you there."

She then clicked over to her missed phone calls, and saw that it was Elliot that had called around 4. She hit the button for her voicemail and listened to his message.

"Liv. El. Hey… Um… I'm dropping the kids off tomorrow around 2 and I thought maybe I could stop by…maybe we could get some takeout and watch the baseball game or something. So..call me."

Olivia sighed. She knew he was trying to apologize for being such an ass this morning. He wasn't really good at sharing his feelings, so she always had to read between the lines. And she knew this was a peace offering of sorts. It was him letting her know that he wanted things to get back to normal. But really, what was normal? She didn't want things to go back to normal with them, because that meant having everything be the same as it was. And she was done with that.

She opened up her text messaging again and drafted a message to Elliot.

"El. Got your VM. Sorry, I have plans tomorrow. See you Monday." She hesitated before she hit SEND. She knew that he would be pissed; that he would interpret it as her refusal of his apology. Should she say something else? Tell him that they were fine? Or something to acknowledge that she understood his apology? She stood there for a minute, contemplating. She shook her head, and hit SEND.

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	7. Chapter 7

Elliot had been busy with the kids, and hadn't had a chance to call Olivia all day. He knew he had acted like a jackass, grilling her about where she'd been. He knew he couldn't push Olivia like that; that she immediately got defensive and pushed back or ran away. He shook his head. How had things managed to unravel in just 24 hours? They were at a bar, having drinks and laughing and talking and then…it all went to hell. He thought maybe if they could just get together, talk over a couple of beers, that maybe he could apologize and they could get things back to normal. When he finally had the chance to give her a call, it was late afternoon. He was frustrated when she didn't answer, but he also knew she had been up all night. Maybe she was sleeping.

When a couple of hours had passed without a return call, he started to wonder if he should call her again. He had his phone in his hand, but decided against it. He didn't want it to appear as if he was being overbearing. He told himself he would wait until tomorrow morning to follow up with her again. He and the kids were going to dinner and a movie, so that would distract him from wondering what she was doing. And who she was doing it with.

Elliot and the kids had just left the movie theatre and were headed home when he felt his phone vibrate. He pulled it out and saw the message was from Liv. He smiled as he opened up the message, but his smile quickly faded as he read the contents. "What the hell?" he thought to himself. Usually, Liv was always up for a movie or takeout. If they weren't working, she usually didn't have much else going on. The only other people she hung around with every once in a while were Alex or Casey. Was she really that mad at him? And then it hit him-she was going to be with Matt. He had been so wrapped up in his thoughts about him and Olivia, that he had completely forgotten what the argument was about. It was about that asshat Matt. She was with HIM. She had spent half the night with him last night, sneaking out after Elliot had taken her home. And was she with him right now? His mind wandered to the two of them together. He could see Matt with his arms around her, his hands on her, kissing her…

"DAD!" said Dick.

Elliot stopped and looked around. He had been so lost in his thoughts that he had walked right past his apartment building. The kids had all stopped at the door and were staring at him.

"Are you OK?" asked Elizabeth. "Did something happen? You look mad."

Elliot shook his head. "Nah. I'm fine. It's nothing." He walked back towards the door, unlocking it and taking the kids back up to his apartment. When they got the apartment, Elliot walked towards his bedroom. "I just need a minute" he said. "I'll be right back out." He went into his bedroom, closing the door behind him. He sat down on the bed and scrubbed his hands over his face.

The thought crossed his mind that he always took Olivia for granted; she was always there for him. Whenever he wanted to talk, whenever he wanted to hang out, she was there. But how often did she go home alone, especially when he was married. Did he ever think about that? Ever think about her needs? He was such a selfish bastard. He told himself that he loved her, but when had he ever sacrificed anything for her? He always told himself that her happiness was all that mattered, but had he kept her from being happy? Had he sabotaged any chance of her having a normal life? The family she wanted? All the innuendo over the years; all the flirting and toeing the line. Did he make promises to her that he couldn't keep? That kept her from the happiness she deserved? If she could be happy with Matt, could he stand in the way?

He groaned and flopped back on the mattress, throwing an arm over his head. This was so fucked up.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOE

Olivia got up early Sunday morning, excited about meeting Matt. It looked like Mother Nature was playing along, as it was a bright, sunny day. Olivia was trying to decide what to wear when she heard her cell phone buzz. It was a text from Elliot.

"Got ur message. Really wanted to hang but OK. Pick u up Mon AM?"

Olivia sighed. She could just see Elliot pouting when he read her message. She really wanted to avoid any time alone with him, because he was just going to grill her about where she had been all day today, and what she had been doing. But she also knew that she wasn't going to be able to avoid him forever.

"Sounds good." She texted back, and dropped her phone back on the nightstand.

She took her time getting ready, eventually decided on a simple pair of jeans, a blue, short sleeved shirt, and some sandals. She did her hair and make-up, and was ready to catch a cab by 1230. She got dropped at Columbus Circle, and looked around for Matt. She didn't see him, so she found a spot of wait, figuring he would find her.

He found her about 5 minutes later. He looked great in jeans and a dark blue polo shirt. Olivia appraised him as he walked over, and thought he didn't really look that much different than college. "Was he that sexy back then?" she wondered to herself. Before she could answer herself, he had reached her.

"Hello gorgeous." He said, leaning over and kissing her on the right cheek. "Been waiting long?"

"No. Just got here." Olivia said with a smile.

"It takes longer than I thought getting here from Brooklyn on the subway." Said Matt.

"You took the subway?" Olivia furrowed her brow.

"Of course. I can't afford to take a cab all that way. And I don't have a car. That's why I had you meet me instead of picking you up. I hope that's OK."

"Of course. That's fine."

"Ready?" he asked. He took her hand and led her into the park. They strolled along the walkway, watching all of the people, walking, biking, rollerblading and picnicking.

"I haven't been here for so long. I used to spend a lot of time here. Do you get her often?" asked Matt.

Olivia laughed. "Yeah, I get here often. You wouldn't believe how many sex crimes take place here."

Matt got a surprised look on his face, and Olivia immediately felt bad.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I forget…I just have a jaded view of the park I guess. It wasn't always that way. I used to love to come here. I just don't get a chance to come here very often…at least when I'm not working."

"it's OK. I just forget that you're a cop. I guess I just don't see you that way. I only know the Olivia I knew in college."

"Yeah, well, I'm not that girl anymore…" said Olivia. She was a little disappointed. She hoped Matt wanted to get to know the woman she was today and not be stuck with thoughts of the girl she was then.

Matt could sense the shift in her mood. He stopped and faced her. "I know…and I am anxious to get to know you again." Olivia smiled.

"OK, and I am anxious to get to enjoy this beautiful park and this beautiful day. I don't get to do things like this very often."

They kept walking through the park, stopping periodically to listen to musicians that were playing, joining in with the crowds watching kids work the crowds with their antics, looking at artwork crowded on stands. They talked about their days together in college, and told stories about their lives after, learning more about each other as they walked. After a few hours of strolling, the grabbed some hotdogs and a drink from a vendor and found a shady spot to sit and eat. They had finished eating, and were content, sitting and watching people going by. Matt had taken Olivia's hand in his, and they were leaning against each other lightly.

"I can't think of the last time I have had such a relaxing day" said Olivia. "If I'm not working, I am catching up on paperwork, or running errands or trying to squeeze in a workout. Thank you."

Matt turned his head to look at Olivia. "I'm glad you could fit me into your busy schedule" he said with a smile.

Olivia bumped is shoulder. "I didn't mean it that way."

"I know" he said quietly. "But I am really glad you could spend the afternoon with me. I was really having a good time with you at the diner on Friday night and was really bummed when you had to leave."

"Now you know why I don't date much. That's how my life works." said Olivia. "It's hard for regular people to get used to."

"Regular people?" said Matt, laughing. "Is that what we are? Regular people?"

"I guess that sounds funny, now that you said it." Laughed Olivia. "But it's true!"

Matt put his arm around Olivia's shoulders. "God, I missed that laugh. You have the best laugh, and the most beautiful smile. When you smile like that, your eyes light up and it's just…breathtaking."

Olivia rolled her eyes. She wasn't used to all of these compliments, and it made her uncomfortable. Her eyes landed back on Matt's face, and he was staring at her. Olivia's breath caught as he leaned in and kissed her gently on the lips. When she didn't resist, he kissed her again, and she found herself kissing him back. She lifted her arms around his neck, giving into the feeling of his lips on hers. Matt pulled her a little closer, intensifying the kiss.

Olivia pulled back. She wasn't one for big displays of public affection. Matt pulled her back towards him, kissing her gently again. Olivia's mind and heart were racing. She couldn't believe she was kissing Matt; she wasn't sure how she felt about it.

As he was kissing her, Olivia heard her cell phone ringing. She broke off the kiss, somewhat glad for the interruption and a chance to catch her breath.

"Sorry, I have to get that." She pulled it out of her pocket and saw it was Elliot. Of course it was. His timing was impeccable. It was like he knew she was kissing someone and wanted to put an end to it. She debated about answering it or not. After a few seconds of debate, she hit connect.

"Hey" she said, slightly out of breath.

Elliot was surprised she answered, so he didn't answer her right away.

"El?" she asked.

"Oh, yeah. Hey. I'm driving back from Queens right now and thought maybe your plans changed…"

"No." Olivia replied. "I still have plans"

"Are you with Matt?" asked Elliot. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he regretted it. He didn't want her to know that he was thinking about it, about her and Matt.

Olivia looked over at Matt, who was watching her.

"Elliot." She said sternly. "I will see you in the morning."

"Liv. Just.."

"I will see you in the morning El. Goodbye." Said Olivia, ending the call.

"Problems?" asked Matt.

Olivia sighed heavily. "No."

Matt debated about pushing it. It seemed like he was stepping in the middle of something, but he didn't want to push it. He really wanted to spend more time with Olivia, and if she said it wasn't a problem, then he was going to believe her.

"It's getting late" said Olivia. "And I have to work in the morning."

"It's only 5:00." Said Matt.

"Ah, musician's hours. You probably sleep until noon and go to bed at 4AM. I, on the other hand, have to get up at 6AM every day."

"Just let me buy you dinner. Nothing fancy. A hotdog and a Coke in the park don't really count as a meal." Said Matt.

Olivia looked at him and could tell he wasn't ready for the day to end. And frankly, she was having a good time.

"Fine. Let's just grab a bite somewhere around here and then I have to head home and get ready for tomorrow."

They strolled out of the park, hand in hand, and found a small bistro to have dinner. After dinner, they walked out of the restaurant.

"Thanks for dinner Matt. And for today. I had a great day." Said Olivia.

Matt took her hands in his. "I had a FANTASTIC day Olivia. I don't want it to end."

"I know but duty calls. I have to get home." Olivia wasn't sure if Matt was hoping she would invite him back home with her, but she wasn't ready for that. "I'm just going to grab a cab."

"I can see you home." He said.

Olivia laughed. "I'm a cop Matt. I don't need you to protect me. But I appreciate the offer. You have a long enough ride home." She said, putting any debate in his and her mind to rest.

Matt looked disappointed. Olivia knew he was still caught off guard sometimes with the woman the young girl had turned into. "OK. Got it."

"Matt. It's been a great day, and I have had a great time reconnecting with you. But it's been two days…let's just see what happens, OK?" she leaned in and kissed him gently. "Call me tomorrow."

She let his hands drop and walked away, hailing a cab. She turned back when the cab stopped, and saw him standing there looking at her. She waved as she got into the cab, headed for home.

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	8. Chapter 8

Elliot got back to his apartment after dropping the kids off, kicking himself for calling Olivia again. He was actually really surprised that she had answered. And then he had pushed her on the Matt thing again. He grabbed a beer out of the fridge and plopped down on the couch, flipping on the TV. Trying to find something to take his mind of Olivia and what she might be doing right now…

But he couldn't get her out of his mind. She had dated this guy for a long time and certainly had slept with him in college. Would she jump back in bed with him right away? He knew Olivia wasn't prone to jumping in bed with just any guy, but she knew this guy. God, what if she was screwing him right now? A vision of Olivia, naked in bed popped into his head…and not for the first time.

Damnit! He tried to get the image out of his head, but he couldn't. It should be him there kissing her, running his hands over her body, hearing her moan his name.

He threw the beer bottle against the wall, hearing the sound of it shattering, and watching the beer running down the wall.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

When Olivia got home, she decided to take a long, hot bath. As she relaxed in the hot water, she thought back over the day in her mind. She couldn't remember the last time she had enjoyed a day off like today. Like a normal person. She walked through the park, watching all of the couples and families, and realized that just for today, she was one of them. Just like she had always wanted to be. She thought about Matt kissing her. It seemed familiar to her, bringing her back to her college days. She had kissed him back, trying to lose herself in the moment. But she had to admit, the kiss didn't ignite any deeper feelings; there was no spark. But she had also been very self-conscious. Making out in public was not her style. She closed her eyes, thinking back to the kiss, the feeling of his mouth on hers, and suddenly it was Elliot kissing her. Elliot pulling her closer. She was wrapping her arms around him, kissing him back and she felt her body start to tingle. Her eyes flew open. What the hell? She shook her head, shaking thoughts of Elliot from her mind.

She heard her cell phone ringing in the bedroom and sighed. She got out of the tub, grabbing a towel and trying to make it to the phone. When she walked into the bedroom, the phone stopped ringing. She looked at the caller ID and saw it was Casey. She walked over to her dresser, found a tank top and pajama pants, and got dressed. She toweled off her hair, and then grabbed the phone to call Casey back. She plopped down on the bed, and hit the call back button.

Casey answered on the first ring. "Hey Liv."

"Hi Casey. I saw that you called. What's up?"

"We have some court prep to go through tomorrow, so I thought maybe we could meet for a quick breakfast and just get it out of the way in the morning. How does that sound?" asked Casey.

Olivia groaned. She hated court prep work. "Case-really? Do we have to do this tomorrow?"

"You've already put it off for a week and the trial is next week. We have to go through your testimony. Plus, I want to get the scoop on this Matt guy."

"Casey, there's nothing to tell you." Insisted Olivia.

"Yeah, right. Are you going to meet me tomorrow morning or not?"

Olivia sighed. "Yes, I'll meet you. What time and where?"

"7 AM. Let's meet at the little breakfast place by my office." said Casey. "And I want to hear ALL the details." Casey hung up the phone before Olivia could reply.

Olivia threw herself back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. Now she was going to have to call Elliot and tell him that she wasn't going to need a ride tomorrow morning, and that she wouldn't be in until late. Part of her was happy, as she wanted to avoid more questions about Matt. But part of her wanted to see Elliot. She hadn't seen him for a few days, and she wanted to see those blue eyes…

"Get it together Benson." she said to herself. She sat up, grabbed her phone and walked into the kitchen. She grabbed a beer out of the fridge, and went into the living room. She curled up on the couch, opened the beer, and took a long drink. She opened up her text messaging, and drafted a message to Elliot.

"Hey. I have to meet Casey in the morning for court prep. We're going to have breakfast, so I won't need a ride. See you at the house later. Thx." She hesitated. She knew that Elliot was going to be ticked off that she hadn't called him personally, but she didn't want to get into it with him. She would see him at the 1-6 when she was done with Casey. She hit SEND.

She turned on the TV, flipping through the stations until she found an old movie. She grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch, covered herself and snuggled in to watch the movie.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot had cleaned up the broken glass and spilled beer. He had to get out of the apartment and get some fresh air. He needed to clear his head. He threw on a t-shirt and some sweats, and went down to the station. He needed to get rid of some of his energy and his anger. When he got there, he threw his phone in his locker, put some tape on his knuckles and went into the small workout area. He started in on the punching bag. He took out his anger on the bag, thinking about Olivia, their partnership, their history. He thought about Matt, worming his way back into her life, and he thought about what he should do about it. Should he let her go? Let her have a chance at a normal life? Or should he fight for her? Knowing all the problems that a relationship between the two of them would cause?

An hour later, his hands were bloody and bruised, and he was sweating and exhausted. He sat down hard against the wall, trying to slow his breathing. Even though his anger was spent, he hadn't really been able to think clearly. He hadn't decided what he should do. He just knew that he was anxious to see her tomorrow; to make sure they were OK. Once he saw her and talked to her, he thought he might know how she was feeling and what he should do.

He walked back to his locker and grabbed his phone. He saw he had a message from Olivia. He opened it up, and read the message, sinking down on the bench while he read it. She was avoiding him! And he knew it has to do with Matt; she didn't want to talk to him about it. Damnit! His anger boiled up and he jumped up, slamming his right fist into the lockers.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia hadn't heard from Elliot by the time she went to bed, and she was surprised. But in a way, she was relieved. She had expected for him to call her, and she didn't want to get into another argument with him. She didn't know where this thing with Matt was going, but she needed to push ahead and see where it led. If Elliot wasn't going to make a move, she had to be OK with that and try to move past it. She climbed into bed, trying to put Elliot out of her mind, and get some sleep.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

The next morning, Olivia was up early, got ready and grabbed a cab to meet Casey at the diner. She had actually gotten a good night's sleep and was ready to tackle the day. She still hadn't heard from Elliot, but she knew she would be back at the squad by late morning and would see him then.

She saw Casey already seated at a small table for two towards the back of the diner. She sat down, and the waitress was there immediately. Olivia ordered tea and a muffin, and turned to her friend.

"Hey Casey. Did you have a good weekend?" asked Olivia.

"Yeah, it was pretty quiet. I ran some errands, cleaned up the apartment, you know, stuff like that. Yesterday I went out to visit my parents." She rolled her eyes.

Olivia laughed. "I take it their still asking you when you're going to settle down and raise a family?"

"Yes. It drives me insane. It doesn't matter how successful I am in my career, they want grandchildren. It sucks being an only child." Said Casey.

"You know they're proud of you" said Olivia.

"Yes, they are. But they still don't understand how I can be involved with sex crimes. Why I would want to deal with that day in and day out."

"I know. I made a comment to Matt the other day about all of the sex crimes in Central Park and he made a face. I told him I forget that regular people don't get our view. And he called me on calling everyone else regular people. But it's true, isn't it?" asked Olivia.

"Ah, so you were with Matt." Said Casey.

"I was talking about sex crimes and people's views and the only thing you picked out of that entire conversation is Matt's name?" said Olivia, smiling at her friend.

"C'mon Liv. Spill it. What's going on with him? He is incredibly sexy and he seems like a nice guy." Said Casey, as the waitress brought their order and they dug in.

"I don't know Casey. I met him after we left the bar on Friday night and we talked until 4AM. I got called on a case and had to leave then. Then we spent yesterday afternoon in Central Park, and had a quick dinner afterwards. It's been great reconnecting, but mostly we have spent a lot of time reminiscing about our college days and the things we did. We did a little catching up about our lives since then but…"

"But what?" said Casey.

"I just feel like in many ways, he is the same guy I knew in college. He's still in a band, still unsettled, still living the same life he did when he was 25. I have changed so much since college…"

"Liv. Give the guy a chance. I feel like you are giving up before you've even had a chance to get to know him again. You're basing this on what? A couple of hours? You've got to give it a chance. What if this guy is the one?"

"I know. I just…" Olivia trailed off, looking down at the table.

"Is this about Elliot?" asked Casey. Olivia's eyes snapped up to meet hers.

"I don't know what you mean." Said Olivia, taking on a slightly annoyed tone.

"Yeah, right. C'mon. You and Elliot have been playing this stupid game for so long…and nothing has changed since his divorce. Neither one of you is willing to go there, so what are you going to do? Never date? Never get married? Just hang in limbo forever? C'mon Liv. You deserve more." Said Casey, shaking her head.

"I don't know what you think is going on between Elliot and me, but we're just partners, and best friends. My relationship with Elliot has nothing to do with what's going on with Matt. So you can just drop it." Said Olivia, finishing up her tea.

"Liv..." Said Casey.

"Drop it." Said Olivia, pulling some cash out of her pocket and dropping it on the table. "So are we going to prep for that case or not?" She stood up from the table, and waited for a response from Casey.

Casey sighed, got up from the table, and followed her friend out of the diner.

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	9. Chapter 9

Elliot walked into the squad room on Monday morning, and saw Fin and Munch were already at their desks.

"Where's Liv?" asked Fin, knowing that Elliot often gave her a ride in now that he lived in the city.

"Court prep with Casey." Elliot said shortly, plopping down in his chair and firing up his computer.

Fin and Munch looked at each other. They could tell Elliot was in a bad mood, and neither one wanted to provoke him.

Elliot worked on cleaning up some paperwork that was piled on his desk, looking up whenever anyone entered the squad room. By 10:00AM, Liv still hadn't come back. Where the hell was she? Going over testimony didn't normally take that long.

He worked quietly for another half hour, only taking a break long enough to get up from his desk and get some of coffee. A few minutes later, Cragen came out of his office.

"Who's catching?" he asked the group of detectives.

"We are" said Elliot, knowing Fin and Munch were still working on the case from the weekend. "But Liv's not back from court prep with Casey."

"Take Fin with you. John can handle the other case for now." said Cragen, walking back in his office.

Fin looked at Munch. He didn't really like the thought of having to spend the next couple of hours with a pissed off Elliot, but he didn't have much of a choice. He stood up and grabbed his jacket.  
"I'm ready if you are." He said to Elliot. Elliot stood up with a sigh, grabbed his car keys and headed out of the squad with Fin trailing behind him.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

It was a little after 11 when Olivia came walking into the squad room. Her eyes quickly scanned the room, looking for Elliot, but Munch was the only person at his desk. She dropped her stuff on her desk, and John swung his chair around to look at her.

"Well, there you are. We were about to file a missing person's report on you." he said, smiling at Olivia.

"I was with Casey, preparing for a trial next week." She said. "Didn't Elliot tell anyone?"

"Yeah, he told us. But it doesn't usually take this long and he was getting…" he stopped to choose the right word. "Impatient."

Olivia laughed "Impatient? Good one."

"Well, in the meantime, a case came in, so Cragen sent Fin with Elliot. Fin wasn't too happy, considering the mood Elliot was in. So I am going to guess you probably owe him big time." Munch said, winking at Olivia.

Olivia sat down in her chair. She had delayed coming back to the squad room, hoping that some of the guys would be out and that maybe she and Elliot would have a chance to catch a few moments to talk and catch up. But that plan had backfired. She set her court files aside, so she could review it again later, and picked up some current paperwork that needed to be finished.

"Hey John. I want to say thank you for coming in on Saturday. It looks like I owe you AND Fin now. I really appreciate it."

"Don't worry Liv. We all help each other out when we can. It's no big deal and it's a pretty open and shut case. It was her ex-boyfriend that attacked her. We have witnesses and DNA, so it's a slam dunk. I wish they were all this easy."

Olivia went back to the paperwork on her desk. The squad room was relatively quiet, so that would allow her to catch up on some of the work she had to do. By mid-afternoon, Elliot and Fin still weren't back. She stretched in her chair, and got up and made herself some tea. When she got back to her desk, her cell phone was ringing. Her caller ID said it was Matt.

She answered on the third ring. "Benson." She said, using her customary greeting.

Matt laughed on the other end. "Is that how you always answer the phone?"

"Sorry-it's usually work so…yeah."

"How's your day going?" Matt asked.

"Fine. The usual." said Olivia, not wanting to get into the details with him.

"So, the band has practice tonight in Brooklyn, but I thought maybe we could meet somewhere for dinner before I head out? Maybe meet over by NYU? That's kind of halfway…" Matt said hopefully.

Olivia thought for a moment. "Sure, that would be fine. What time and where?"

"I don't care. You pick a spot and text me. I am not familiar with what's here anymore. But it will have to be by 5:30 so I can get back to Brooklyn by 7:30. We're having a long rehearsal tonight because it's been a couple of weeks since we've been able to rehearse."

"Wow, OK, I will try to be there by 5:30. That's kind of early, but I will see what I can do. I'll find a spot and text you."

"OK." See you." Said Matt.

Olivia hung up the phone and looked at Munch. "Do you know of any good restaurants in Greenwich Village? Over by NYU?" Olivia asked.

"You're joking, right? There are a million restaurants in this city. And I don't go out to eat very often." said Munch.

"Right. Never mind." She pulled up Google and starting searching for restaurants, finally settling on a tapas bar that specialized in Spanish food. That sounded good. And it wasn't a bar, and it wasn't a fancy restaurant. She pulled up her text messaging, and sent Matt the name and address of the restaurant. She looked at her watch, and noticed it was 4:30. She just had time to file some of the completed paperwork before she had to get into a cab and towards the restaurant.

When she came out of the file room, Cragen was out in the bullpen. "Fin and Elliot aren't back yet?" he asked.

"I haven't seen or heard from them" said Olivia, looking over at Munch.

"Me neither" said Munch.

"OK, well I have a meeting down at 1PP, so I will see you in the morning" said the captain, as he walked out of the squad room.

Olivia grabbed her stuff, and headed out right behind him. "Good night John." She said. "I'll see you tomorrow." She was gone before Munch could even say anything.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot and Fin got back to the squad room around 5:30, just as John was packing up his stuff to go home. Elliot looked around the room. "Where's Liv?" he asked.

"She came in right after you left this morning, and she left about a half hour ago. Cap'n had a meeting down at 1PP, so he left right before Liv." Said Munch.

"Where was she going? She doesn't usually leave that early." Said Elliot.

"I don't know." Said Munch. "I didn't ask her and she didn't say."

Elliot slumped down in his chair. He couldn't believe another day had gone by without him seeing Olivia. Now he was getting paranoid. Was she really trying that hard to avoid him? He pulled out his phone, ready to call her. But before he hit #1 on speed dial, he thought about what he was going to say. Was he going to question her about where she was, what she was doing? Was he going to accuse her of avoiding him? Nothing he had to say right now was going to be pleasant conversation and he didn't want to argue with her. And he knew it would end in an argument because he was in a pissy mood. He put his phone down.

Maybe he should just drop by her apartment unannounced. But what if she wasn't there? Or worse yet, what if HE was there? No, that wasn't a good idea. He scrubbed his hands up and down his face. He would just have to keep his cool and talk to her tomorrow. He grabbed his stuff and headed out the door, determined to go home and put Olivia out of his mind.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia walked into the restaurant at 5:35, and didn't see Matt at any of the tables. The hostess seated her and the waitress took her drink order. Another 5 minutes had passed, and the waitress brought her beer and a cold mug. Olivia looked around, but there was still no sign of Matt. She pulled out her phone to see if she had missed a message. Another 10 minutes passed with still no sign of him. Olivia checked her phone again to see if she had given him the wrong address, when she saw him walk through the front door. She waved a hand at him, and he saw her and walked over.

"Hey!" he leaned over to kiss her on the cheek. He sat down in the chair across the table from her. "Been waiting long?'

"About twenty minutes." She said, indicating her beer glass, which was almost empty. She was a little put off that he didn't apologize for being late.

"I'd better catch up." He waved his hand and got the waitress' attention. He ordered a beer, and gestured towards Olivia, asking if she wanted another one.

"I'd better wait until I get something to eat. I didn't have lunch today." Olivia said.

"So" said Matt. "How was your day?" he leaned back casually in his chair.

Olivia let out a sigh. "It was fine. Boring actually. I met my friend Casey for breakfast. Then she and I went over some court prep. Then I went into the squad room and finished paperwork all afternoon. I didn't catch any new cases today, so that was good."

Matt looked confused. "Court prep? And who is Casey?"

Olivia smiled. She was so used to hanging out with people 'in the business', she forgot that he didn't know all the players. "Casey is the ADA. Assistant District Attorney. For sex crimes. I work with her a lot, and she's a friend. And when I have to testify in a case, I always spend some time with her going over my testimony. I have to testify next week on a case where I was the arresting officer and took the victim's statement."

"Wow. Big time." He laughed. "I'm sorry, Olivia. I just can't see you arresting people, and being in court. This is just so weird."

"Do I need to show you my gun and badge?" asked Olivia.

"Whoa. You have your gun on you?" Matt asked incredulously.

"Yeah. I came right from work. And technically, I am always on duty." Said Olivia.

Matt shook his head. "Sorry officer." Said Matt, smiling at her.

"That's Detective" Olivia said, in an annoyed voice.

Matt put up his hands. "Olivia, did I say something wrong? Why are you mad?"

Olivia sighed. "No, I'm not mad. It's just been a long day, and then when you were late, I just got annoyed. And I just…" she paused, looking down at the table.

"Just what?" said Matt.

"I just feel like you want me to be the girl you knew in college. And I'm not that girl anymore Matt. I have changed a lot in the past 20 years. And I am not sure that you want to know the person I am now. You always seem surprised when I talk about work; about the things I do."

"Olivia" Matt interrupted her and she looked up at him. "Stop. I know you've changed. I've changed too. I didn't mean anything by what I said. I'm just…I guess I'm impressed and I feel a little intimidated by you. Not by you, but by what you do."

"Intimidated? Come on."

"Olivia. Can we please just start these evening over? I just want to have dinner and a few laughs with a beautiful woman. I'm sorry I was late." Matt reached over and took Olivia's hands in his. "OK?"

Olivia smiled. "OK."

They ordered dinner and continued talking during dinner. Olivia relaxed, and really started to enjoy herself. It was nice to unwind after a long day, and to not talk shop. As they were finishing their dinner, Matt looked at his watch.

"Hey. It's already 7:30. I'm late for practice. I have to go." He said. "But I don't want to."

Olivia smiled. "I'm having a good time too."

"Hey, I have an idea. Why don't you come with me? Come watch practice like you used to. A couple of the guys you knew are still in the band. Jeff and Lucas. They'd love to see you. It would be like old times!"

"Matt. I'm not going to go all the way over to Brooklyn to listen to your band practice. I have to get up early tomorrow morning."

Matt looked disappointed. "Yeah, I get it."

"Matt."

"No, it's fine. I get it. Really." He stood up. "I have to get going. Can I call you tomorrow?"

"Sure" said Olivia. "I'd like that." She stood up, and Matt gestured for her to walk ahead of him. They walked out of the restaurant and Matt grabbed her hand.

"It was really great to see you again Olivia." Said Matt.

"You're not mad that I'm not coming with you?" asked Olivia.

"No. I'm not mad. I understand." Matt leaned over, placing a gentle kiss on her lips. "I will just look forward to seeing you again."

Olivia smiled. "Me too."

Matt raised a hand, and a cab pulled over. Matt opened the door for her, and kissed her on the cheek before she got inside. She waved as the cab pulled away.

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	10. Chapter 10

Olivia didn't get home until almost 8:30. It had started raining, and the streets were clogged with traffic. She kept checking her phone, but didn't have any new messages. When she got to her apartment, she changed into a tank and pajama pants, grabbed a bottle of water, and plopped down on the couch. She really wanted to call Elliot. She had missed him today. She pulled up his number; she wanted to call him. But she couldn't call him up and tell him that she missed him. But she did miss him. She missed his intense blue eyes, his smell, his presence. She sighed and lay her head back on the couch and closed her eyes. She took a couple of deep breaths.

She lifted up her head, and pulled up Elliot's number. She hit the CALL button before she could talk herself out of it. Elliot answered on the first ring.

"Liv? Are you OK?" asked Elliot, sounding anxious.

"Hey El. Yeah, I'm fine. I just wanted to check in." said Olivia. "We kept missing each other today."

"Yeah. Fin wasn't too happy when he got pulled into this case today. It was a mess." said Elliot. "I wish you would have been there. I could have used your touch with the victim."

"Sorry. Court prep took longer than I thought…"

"I thought maybe you were avoiding me." said Elliot softly.

"El. That wasn't the case. I really had to go over my testimony with Casey."

"K." said Elliot, not sure if he believed her.

Olivia could feel the tension between them over the phone. "Will you pick me up tomorrow morning?" she asked. "I'll even buy you coffee."

"Of course." said Elliot. "You know I will. And you don't have to buy me coffee."

"El. Are you OK?" asked Olivia.

"Yeah. Just tired." he lied. "I need to go to bed. I'll see you in the morning. Night Liv." he said, and disconnected the call.

Olivia sat with the phone in her hand, a few tears brimming on her lower lashes.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia got up early after a restless night. She hadn't been able to stop thinking about Elliot and Matt, going back and forth, trying to sort out her feelings. She was having a really great time reconnecting with Matt, but she felt so damn guilty. She felt like she was cheating on Elliot. But that was crazy. Elliot was her partner; her friend. He had made it pretty clear that he wasn't interested in changing things between them. She had to stop feeling like she was doing something wrong. On the other hand, if he didn't want to take things further, then why was he acting jealous? Or was that in her mind? She let out an exasperated sound, and sat up in bed. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed, and got on her feet. For the hundredth time, she told herself to get a grip and started to get ready for her day.

Olivia was standing in her kitchen when she heard a knock on her door. She opened the door, and saw Elliot standing there, holding a bakery bag.

"Hey El. You just had to text me. I would have come down." Said Olivia.

"I know. But I'm a little early, so I thought maybe you weren't ready." He handed her the bakery bag as he walked into her apartment. "I got you a blueberry muffin."

He walked over and opened up the refrigerator. "Do you have any juice?"

Olivia looked surprised. "Thanks. Not sure about the juice. I think so."

Elliot had pulled the orange juice out of the refrigerator. "Where's the expiration date on this?"

Olivia slapped him lightly on the arm. "El!"

"Well Liv, you know that half the time the stuff in your refrigerator is past its' prime. I don't want to get sick." he laughed.

Olivia smiled; glad to see him joking around with her. The tension left her body and she walked into the kitchen, grabbing a glass for Elliot. "Here you go. Pour a glass for me too please."

Elliot started pouring, filling the glass. "I don't want that much. You can share with me." He took a sip and handed the glass to her.

She smiled, taking the glass from him, and took a sip. "Thanks." She peeked in the bag and saw two muffins in the bag. "Are these both for me?"

"Sheesh Benson. I bring you a muffin and now you want both?" Elliot joked with her, grabbing the bag out of her hands. "Now you get nothing."

Olivia tried to grab the bag back out of his hands but Elliot lifted the bag higher, out of reach.

Olivia backed off, laughing. "Fine. I wasn't hungry anyway."

Elliot grabbed her hand, and Olivia startled at the action. But just as quickly as he grabbed it, he shoved the bag back in her hand. "Liv, I'll give you anything you want. And if you want both, they're yours." He looked intently in her eyes, and she smiled.

"I'd give you a kidney…" she joked, calling back to a previous conversation they'd had. "We'd better get going or we'll be late." She grabbed her keys and badge off the counter, and started walking towards the door. Elliot laughed at her comment and followed behind her.

They got into Elliot's car and pulled away from the curb. As they pulled into traffic, Elliot's phone rang. It was Cragen's ring tone, so Olivia grabbed the phone and answered it.

"Benson." She answered. "No, El's driving so I grabbed his phone." There was silence while she listened. "Yeah, got it. Thanks." She hung up the phone.

Looking at Elliot, she said. "We caught a case. Cap'n wants you to drop me at Mercy to talk to the victim and wants you to meet Munch at the crime scene. He's texting us the address. There goes our morning."

Elliot dropped Olivia at the hospital. "I'll meet you at the crime scene after I talk to the victim" said Olivia as she got out of the car. "See you later." Elliot pulled away and she went into the hospital.

It took a couple of hours for Olivia to talk to the victim and sit with her while the rape kit was done. When she was done, she walked out and checked her messages. Elliot had sent her a message letting her know that he was done at the crime scene, that he would meet her back at the precinct and that he was getting their favorite Chinese takeout for lunch.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia had just got back to the squad room when her desk phone rang. "Benson" she answered. It was the desk sergeant letting her know that she had just sent up someone to see her. Just as Olivia was going to ask who it was, she saw Matt walking into the squad room. She hung up the phone, looked at Matt, and then looked over at Elliot. He was taking their Chinese out of the bags, and wasn't paying attention. She got up and rushed over to meet Matt.

"What are you doing here?" she asked in a soft voice, trying not to bring attention. She looked back at Elliot and saw him watching her as she put a hand on Matt's shoulder and gently guided him back out of the squad room. He resisted her push, and stopped just inside the door. She turned her attention back at him as he stopped.

"I wanted to surprise you."

"How did you even know where I was?" Olivia asked.

"I have my ways." He said mischievously, laughing. "I thought maybe you could play hooky this afternoon, and we could spend the rest of the day together."

Olivia looked at him like he was crazy. "I can't just walk out of here."

Matt put his hands on her hips, shaking her playfully. "C'mon. Live a little. It's just one afternoon. I have band rehearsal again tonight and with you working days and me working nights, we won't have much time to see each other. So I thought it would be fun to hang out today. It's a gorgeous day…"

Olivia pulled his hands off her hips, and cut him off. "Matt. I'm working. I have a rape victim at Mercy and I need to work on this case. What am I supposed to tell her? Sorry, I don't feel like working today. I will deal with your shit tomorrow?"

Matt's smile left his face. "Sorry, I just thought…"

Olivia looked back at the squad and saw everyone watching her, trying to look busy when she caught them with their eyes on her. She ran her hands through her hair. "Let's go out in the hall please."

She went out the door but Matt stayed where he was standing. She grabbed his hand and pulled him out into the hallway.

"Matt. I'm sorry. I would love to spend the afternoon with you. I really would. But there's something you have to understand. This job…my work…it comes first. What I do is important. I can't leave a victim, someone that's just been through one of the most traumatic events of their life, and tell them I'm taking a day of vacation. Or that I have to leave at 5 to get home to dinner. When I'm on a case, we push through until we can't move forward anymore. The victims come first."

Matt sighed, leaning up against the wall. "What about you and what you need? You're not allowed to have a life?"

"It's a tough balance, but really, there is no way I could relax and have a good time this afternoon knowing there's a rapist on the loose. You have to understand that, right?"

"I understand it, but I don't have to like it." He said, looking down at the floor.

Olivia grabbed Matt's hands, and he looked up at her. "Matt. This is who I am. We talked about this. And if this is going to be a problem, then…"

Matt stood up and leaned in, giving Olivia a kiss. "It's not a problem. I just have to get used to it. You have a job to do and I respect that." He put his hands on her waist and leaned in for another kiss, just as Elliot came walking into the hall.

"Liv, everything OK?" said Elliot, before Matt could kiss her. When he saw what was going on, he stopped, and Olivia looked over at him. "Everything's fine El. I'll just be a minute."

Elliot stood there awkwardly, but he wasn't going to go back in the squad. He was seeing red, watching Matt put his hands on Olivia, and kissing her. He wasn't about to leave them alone. He knew he was making Olivia uncomfortable, but he was glad about that. He wanted to grab her and pull her out of his grasp and back into the squad room with him, where she belonged.

Olivia turned back to look at Matt. "You'd better go. I have to get back to work." She pulled away. "I'll talk to you later." Matt reluctantly let go of her, and walked over to the elevators, watching Olivia as she walked back into the squad room with Elliot.

_**Please read and review…I really appreciate your comments and feedback.**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**Sorry, this is kind of a short chapter, but it seemed to work out that way. I hope you're enjoying the story. Please leave comments. I appreciate it!**_

Elliot walked back into the squad room and sat down in his chair. Olivia stopped at her desk, looked over at him, and noticed he was watching her. He was leaning back in his chair, steepling his fingers and had a serious expression on his face. "Everything OK?" he asked.

"Yep." said Olivia, only looking at him for a second before sitting down in her chair. "Now where were we?" she asked, picking up her notes. She moved over to the board and started to make notes.

Elliot could tell he wasn't going to get anything else out of her about Matt and their relationship, so he decided not to push it. He got up from his chair, and joined in, running over the case notes with her. They ate their lunch as they worked, eating off of each other's plates like they normally did. When they had everything down, they reviewed it several more times, until Cragen came out and had them review the facts with him. They decided their next course of action, and Elliot and Olivia took off, going to interview some witnesses.

They were busy all day, and came back to the squad after six, exhausted. They had interviewed over ten witnesses, and had revisited the crime scene. Olivia slumped down into her chair. She was tired but they needed to add all of their new information to the files.

"Liv. Why don't you go catch an hour in the cribs? I'll start summarizing our notes." he said, seeing how tired Olivia looked.

"No. I'm fine." said Olivia, sitting up in her chair.

"Just grab an hour. I'll wake you up. I promise." He put his hand on her shoulder. "Go on."

Olivia looked up at him and considered protesting, but she could really use a break. "Thanks El." She got up and walked up the stairs to the cribs. Elliot watched her walk upstairs, glad that she had listened to him for once.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOE

Elliot went through the rest of the notes, adding them to the board. The squad room had emptied out as the day turned into evening. Olivia had been sleeping for about an hour and a half. He knew she would be mad at him for letting her sleep so long. But he figured if she was still sleeping, she probably needed it. Just as he was thinking about going up to wake her, she emerged from the cribs. He smiled when he saw her. Her hair was messed up and her eyes were still sleepy, and she wiped at her face as she walked down the stairs. He thought she looked beautiful. His mind wandered, thinking this would be how she looked after making love, her hair messed up, her face flushed and her eyes heavy with satisfaction and sated lust.

Olivia reached the bottom of the stairs and walked over to him. She reached out to grab his arm, shaking him out of his reverie. "Why didn't you wake me El?"

Elliot shook his head, clearing his mind and looking at her. "What?"

"You promised you'd wake me."

Elliot looked at her, and a vision of her, naked in bed, leapt into his head. Suddenly, he had an overwhelming need to kiss her. He grabbed Olivia by her arms, and pulled her towards him. Olivia put her hands up, bracing them against his chest.

"Elliot! What are you doing?" she said, surprised by his actions and pushing away from him. He stopped, registering the look of surprise on her face. He immediately released her, and she stumbled backwards with the sudden lack of force. She caught herself, and looked back up at him.

"What the hell are you doing?" she asked.

"I..I'm sorry. I just…" he didn't have an explanation. What could he say? That he thought about kissing her almost every damn day? That he thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen? That he pictured her naked, lying beneath him in bed as he…he shook his head again, trying to clear the visions as he looked back at the confused look on her face.

"El?" she said, her face softening. She put her hand on his arm.

Elliot stepped back and turned away from her, letting her hand drop from his arm. "Sorry." He walked away from her, out into the hallway. Olivia just watched him go, not sure if she should follow him or not. In the end, she decided not to. She wasn't sure what she would say to him. He had shocked her. The way he was looking at her; she was certain he was going to kiss her. And as much as she had dreamed about that happening, in the moment, it shocked the hell out of her and she had reacted. If she followed him, she wasn't sure that she wouldn't grab him, and finish what he started. She dropped down in her chair and let out a sigh.

Elliot came back into the squad room a few minutes later. He didn't look at her, but said "I'm going to head home. There's nothing else we can do tonight."

"Ok" said Olivia.

"Are you going home?" asked Elliot, hoping she said yes. He didn't want to think about her possibly going to meet up with Matt.

"Yeah, I'm going home." Olivia said softly, bothered by the fact that Elliot wouldn't look at her.

"Can I give you a ride?" Elliot asked, still not looking at her, starting to walk towards the door.

"If it's not out of your way." said Olivia. She grabbed her keys and jacket, and followed him out of the squad room.

The ride home was quiet, neither one of them knowing what to say to each other. Elliot was kicking himself. This wasn't how he had wanted this to go. He wanted to talk to her, try to figure out what was going on with Matt, try to figure out if she felt anything for him, before he made any kind of move. Now he had blown all of that out of the water by acting like a hormonal teenage boy, grabbing her and almost kissing her.

Olivia could tell that Elliot was brooding. She really wanted to know what he was thinking; what had been going through his mind when he almost kissed her. She really wanted to invite him up so they could talk, but she knew he was in no mood tonight. But she felt like she had to say something. The last few days had been so strained, and she didn't want things to go on like this.

They were at Olivia's apartment before she knew it. Elliot pulled over, but kept the car running.

"El. Look at me." said Olivia. Elliot looked over at her. "It's OK. You just…surprised me."

Elliot took a deep breath. "I'm sorry Liv. I didn't mean to…."

"El. Just forget it. We're fine. OK? Can we just agree to talk about this later? I don't want to have to worry all night that we're not OK."

"OK." said Elliot, looking back towards the windshield. "We're fine."

Olivia wasn't sure he was being honest, but it was the best she could expect tonight. "Good night." She opened the car door, and started to get out of the car. Before she was completely out of the car, Elliot reached over and put a hand on her arm.

"Liv. We're fine. I'll pick you up in the morning." He smiled weakly. He knew if he didn't say something to her, she would be up all night and he didn't want that. This was his fault and he didn't want her to be upset.

Olivia smiled back at him, and placed her hand over his. "Thanks El. See you in the morning."

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	12. Chapter 12

Olivia was tired, despite having slept in the cribs. She went into her bedroom, and put away her gun and her badge. She stripped out of her clothes, leaving her tank on. She pulled out a pair of old sweatpants and put them on. She grabbed Elliot's NYPD sweatshirt and pulled it over her head. She took a deep breath. Even though she had worn the sweatshirt a number of times, she swore she could still smell him on it. She walked back out into the kitchen, and grabbed an open bottle of red wine off the counter. She uncorked it, and poured a glass for herself. She leaned against the counter, and let out a heavy sigh. She felt like she was trying to juggle two lives and keep them from colliding; one with Elliot and one with Matt. When Matt had shown up at the squad room today, she had been surprised. She wasn't even sure how he knew which precinct she worked at. But she figured her name was in the paper often enough that it probably wasn't too hard for anyone to find her. She was flattered that he tracked her down, but was worried about Elliot's reaction. Elliot didn't really know Matt, but based on past experience, and on his reaction to any mention of Matt's name, she thought it better to keep them apart. Elliot wasn't known for controlling her temper and she didn't want him to go off on Matt.

Olivia took a drink of wine, and wandered back to her bedroom, shutting off the lights as she went. She sat down on the bed, and finished the wine. She turned out the lamp on her nightstand, and crawled under the covers.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot stayed parked outside Olivia's apartment after she had gone inside. He watched her apartment lights come on in her living room. Then he saw her bedroom light came on. He was wondering what she was doing. Was she going to go back out, like she had before? Was she calling Matt right now? Was she inviting him over? He settled back in his seat and laid his head back on the headrest. After only about 15 minutes, he saw the lights go out in the living room. He waited, half expecting her to emerge from the building. But a few minutes later, he saw the bedroom light go out too. Obviously, she was going to bed. He looked at this watch. It was still early, so he was surprised, but it had been an exhausting day. He started up the car, and headed home, ready for bed himself. All of this added tension, on top of an already stressful job, made him tired.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia woke up when she heard her phone buzzing. Olivia looked at the clock on her nightstand, noting that it was 2:11AM, as she reached for her phone. She saw that it was a text message from Matt. She opened up the message.

"Hey beautiful. Just got home from practice and was thinking about you. I thought maybe you were still up? Text me back."

Olivia sighed. She hit reply and messaged him back. "Nope. I was asleep. Have to get up in a few hours." She didn't add any commentary, or anything to encourage another reply. She was tired and wanted to go back to sleep. Matt must have forgotten that she was rarely in a good mood when she woke up, whether it was in the middle of the night or in the morning. Even after years of calls in the middle of the night, she still hadn't gotten any better.

Her phone buzzed again, and Olivia saw a reply from Matt.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to wake u. Talk to you soon? Night."

Olivia hesitated, not really wanting to keep the conversation going. But she sent one final text. "NP. Night." Short and sweet, but at least then he would know she wasn't mad at him. She put her phone back down on the nightstand and laid her head back down. She was asleep in a minute.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot texted Olivia from outside her apartment building just a little after 7, letting her know that he was there to pick her up. She grabbed her badge and keys, and walked out of her apartment, locking the door behind her. As she walked out of the apartment building, she saw that Elliot was leaning against the car, talking on his phone.

She walked up to him, tapping him on the arm to let him know she was there. He motioned for her to get into the car, and he climbed in the driver's seat. He pulled away from the curb, finishing up his conversation as he pulled into traffic.

'Yeah, Kath…I heard you. I got it. Talk to you later." He ended the call and tossed the phone onto the center console. He looked over at Olivia. "Good morning." He smiled at her.

"Good morning." said Olivia. She gestured at the phone. "Problems? You sounded frustrated."

Elliot sighed. "Nah. She was just reminding me that we have parent-teacher conferences for the twins tomorrow night and that it's important for me to be there. Like I don't know that. Like I miss those kinds of things on purpose…" he stopped and looked back over at her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to rant. It's just so frustrating. She plays the joint custody card…letting me know that it can all change if I don't do every damn thing she wants me to do. I mean, for God's sake, I feel like she has me on a tighter leash than when we were married."

"El. Don't worry. You're a great dad, and you haven't done anything wrong. If you miss things due to work, the court won't hold that against you. She doesn't really want to keep you away from your kids. She wouldn't do that. She's just messing with you."

Elliot let out a heavy sigh. "Yeah. I know. Thanks Liv." He reached out to touch her hand, but then thought better of it and just placed it awkwardly on the center console.

They pulled into the parking lot by the station, and walked into the building. When they walked into the squad room, Fin looked over at them.

"Captain said for you to go in and see him right away when you got in." he said, gesturing towards the Captain's office.

Elliot and Olivia dropped their stuff on their desks and walked over to the Captain's office. Elliot knocked on the door and they let themselves in when they heard him answer.

"You wanted to see us?" asked Elliot.

"Yes. We got a hit on the DNA from our rape victim yesterday. He's in the system. Daniel Stevens. Just got out of Riker's 6 weeks ago; out early for good behavior." He said shaking his head. "This rape has lots of similarities. He met his previous victim at a bar, chatted with her, bought her a drink. But when she wouldn't go home with him, he got angry, followed her home, broke in and raped her. Same MO." He opened up a file. "Parole board notes that he was going to live with his sister. Go pick him up."

Elliot and Olivia left his office and headed out to the car. "This address is in Alphabet City." said Olivia. "Let's hope he's there and we don't end up chasing after him all day."

"Does his file say anything about him having a job?" asked Elliot. Olivia looked through the notes in the file.

"I don't see anything" she said.

They fought their way through traffic and finally found the address. Elliot pulled up to the curb, on the opposite side of the street, several houses away.

"Let's watch the house. See what's going on." Elliot said. They sat and watched the house for a little over 30 minutes, when a car pulled up in a couple of houses down.

"El, look." Olivia said, pointing at the car. There was a guy in the car, looking over at the house. He moved the car up slowly, finally stopping in front of the house. Elliot and Olivia slid down in their seats a little. Olivia looked at the photo in the file and then at the man getting out of the car.

"That's our man." she said. "How do you want to handle this?"

Elliot considered for a minute. "Let him go into the house. Call for backup, and we'll take him in the house."

Olivia pulled out her radio, and called for backup, telling the squad cars to come to that address without lights and sirens. In the meantime, their suspect let himself into the house.

The squad cars pulled in 10 minutes later. Elliot went around the back of the house with a couple of uniforms, while Olivia knocked on the front door. When no one answered, the uniform broke down the door and they stormed into the house. Olivia heard someone running and then heard the back door slam. A few seconds later, she heard yelling and knew that Elliot had gotten him.

Elliot walked him around to the closest squad car, which would take him back to the station. Elliot and Olivia hopped back into their car and headed back to the precinct. When they got there, Daniel Stevens was already in an interrogation room.

Elliot and Olivia talked about how they wanted to run the interrogation. This guy was real narcissist and a sociopath, so they would play on that. They walked into the interrogation room together.

"Mr. Stevens." said Olivia. "I'm Detective Benson." She pulled out a chair and sat down across from him. "You've already met my partner, Detective Stabler." She motioned to Elliot as he walked in and leaned against the wall.

"So, you've been out of Riker's for 6 weeks, and you are already up to your old tricks." Olivia said. She pulled out a photo of the victim and tossed it on the table.

Daniel didn't even look down at the photo, but kept staring at Olivia. He was smiling, and giving her an appraising look, his eyes lingering on her breasts before looking back up at her.

"Nice to meet you Detective. You're very beautiful." he said.

"Mr. Stevens. Tell me where you were on Monday night." Said Olivia, ignoring his comment.

"Are you really a detective? Body like yours is made for pleasure…seems like a waste." His eyes swept down to her chest again.

Elliot walked over and slapped him in the back of the head. "Answer the detective's question." He walked over and stood behind Olivia, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms.

Daniel Stevens looked up at Elliot. "You screwing her? I bet she's a good.."

"Mr. Stevens" Olivia interrupted before he could finish his sentence. "Please don't make me ask you again. Where were you on Monday night?"

Daniel leaned back in his chair. "I'm kind of tense baby…how about Detective Stabler leaves us alone for a little while and you can relieve my tension. That mouth of yours is driving me crazy."

Elliot rushed over and grabbed Daniel's neck. He smashed his head down on the table. "Shut the hell up." Olivia leapt back. He held Daniel's head down, continuing to apply pressure.

"Elliot! Stop! What are you doing?" Olivia tried to pull his arm away.

"I'm sick of this piece of garbage and his mouth." He let up the pressure slightly and when Daniel tried to lift his head, he slammed it back down.

"Apologize to Detective Benson." Elliot said.

The door of the interrogation room opened and the Captain came in. "Elliot. Let him go." Elliot released his head and stepped back. He looked at Olivia, who had a shocked look on her face. He left the interrogation room, and Olivia followed him.

"Elliot. What the hell was that?" asked Olivia, grabbing Elliot by the arm once they were out of the room.

Elliot spun around. "Do you think I was going to let him keep talking to you like that?"

Olivia rolled her eyes. "El. These guys run their mouths all the time. I have had perps say much worse things to me. I barely even hear it anymore. You know I don't let that shit get to me."

Captain Cragen came out of the interrogation room. "Elliot. What the hell was that? You know better."

"That piece of shit…"

"I don't want to hear it. Nothing that guy says gives you the right to assault him. We're lucky if he doesn't press charges. We don't want to give him a reason for us to have to kick him loose. I'm sending Fin and Munch in to finish the interview."

"Cap'n" Elliot started to protest.

"Don't push it Elliot. I don't want to send you home." He walked back towards his office. Olivia put her hand on his arm.

"C'mon Elliot. Let's dig into the paperwork and witness statements again to see what we have that might help indict Stevens."

Elliot looked at Olivia. "I don't know why you think you have to put up with that crap. That's BS."

"El. He was just trying to get a reaction. And it worked."

Elliot shook his head and sighed. "I know. I let that piece of shit get to me. I don't know why…"

"Elliot. You have a lot going on right now. I know you're stressed. But I'm fine. I don't need you to protect me."

Elliot shook his head. "Fine. Let's get back to work." Elliot walked back out into the squad room and started digging into the files.

_**I know everyone's been waiting for an update. Please let me know if you're still enjoying the story and if I should keep going! I appreciate all of your comments and feedback.**_


	13. Chapter 13

Casey had stopped in to the precinct about an hour after Elliot and Olivia had finished their discussion with Stevens. Fin and Munch came out of the interrogation room an hour later, shaking their heads.

"He's not copping to anything" said Fin.

"The DNA is enough to book him" said Casey. "Have him sent to Central Booking."

A uniform brought Stevens out of the interrogation room and through the squad room. Olivia was sitting at her desk and as he walked by Olivia, he pursed his lips and blew her a kiss. "I hope to see you soon Detective." he said. Elliot jumped up from his chair, but the uniform had pushed him along and out of the squad before Elliot could follow.

Olivia looked up at Elliot. "Elliot."

He looked at her and wiped his hands over his face. "I'll be back in a few minutes." He walked up the stairs towards the cribs. When he got there, he paced back and forth, trying to figure out what he was so angry about. He was around scumbags like that all the time; heard the verbal diarrhea that came out of their mouth all the time. Olivia was right when she said she heard all kinds of crap from these guys. When you work with sexual predators, you have to expect that kind of shit. He didn't know why he let it get to him today. Maybe Olivia was right. There were just too much going on right now. He had to stop letting his anger take over.

He sat down on one of the bunks. When had he ever been able to control his anger? He laid down, and threw an arm over his eyes. In a few minutes, he had fallen asleep.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia went over the witness interviews with Fin and Munch to see if they saw anything new that she and Elliot had missed. She kept looking at the cribs, waiting for Elliot to reappear. After an hour, she excused herself and went up to see what was going on. When she walked into the cribs, she saw Elliot sleeping. She walked over to the bunk and gently placed her hand on his arm, shaking him gently.

"El. Wake up." She said softly.

Elliot jolted awake. "What's wrong?" he said.

"Nothing's wrong. You've been gone for over an hour. I just came up to find you." Olivia was still leaning over him. "Are you OK?"

Elliot looked up into her eyes, seeing her concern. He reached up to touch her cheek, brushing it with his thumb.

Olivia stood up and sat down on the bunk across from him.

"Elliot. I'm worried about you." she said.

Elliot sat up. "Don't worry about me. I'm fine."

"Everything just seems so..." Olivia struggled to find the right word. "Strange between us. We keep telling each other we're fine but we're not."

Elliot didn't say anything. He looked up at her and then back down at his shoes.

"El. How about we pick up some bad food and some beer, and go back to my place and watch a movie, like old times?" said Olivia. "I know I could use a couple of beers and maybe some ice cream."

Elliot smiled. "I think that's a great idea." He looked at his watch. "It's 4:30 now. Let's try to get out of here by 5:30, K?"

"Sounds good." Said Olivia.

They both got up and walked back down into the squad room. They sat down at their desks and started working, trying to get as much done as possible so they could get out of there at a decent time.

Olivia was focused on the file in front of her when she felt something whiz by her head. She whipped her head up and looked over at Elliot. He had a stupid grin on his face. He looked behind her and saw a wad of paper on the floor.

"Did you just throw that at me?" she said increduously.

'I have said your name three times, but you were zoned out." Elliot said. "So I had to get your attention. Time to go."

Olivia leaned back in her chair. "Finally."

She closed the file in front of her, and stood up. She grabbed her keys and jacket. Elliot was still seated at his desk. "Stabler…let's go!" she said laughing.

Elliot smiled. He hadn't heard Olivia laugh in days. It always made him smile, especially when he was the one that made her laugh. He was really looking forward to tonight. He just wanted to have an evening with her, just talking and…just being with her. He didn't want to talk about anything major; not tonight. He just loved being in her company, and the best moments with her was when they weren't talking. They were comfortable enough with each other that they didn't feel the need to fill the space with constant babble.

Elliot got up from his chair. "So what movie are you going to make me watch tonight?" he asked.

Olivia smiled. "Hmmm. I'm not sure what I have. I don't have anything you haven't seen before. If you want, we can pick up a new movie when we pick up some food. What are you in the mood for?"

"I guess I really don't care. Maybe a comedy?" Elliot said as they climbed into the car. On the way back to Olivia's, they stopped at their favorite deli, and picked up some sandwiches. Then they stopped at a bodega and grabbed one of the latest comedies and some ice cream.

"We're set." said Olivia. "Now let's get back to my place before the food is cold and the ice cream melts." They headed to Olivia's apartment. Elliot pulled up to the curb and stopped the car, listening to a story that Olivia was telling him and laughing. Olivia stopped in the middle of her story and Elliot looked over at her to see what was wrong. She was staring through the windshield and he heard her mutter something under her breath. He looked over at her building entrance, and saw Matt sitting on the step.

Olivia looked over at Elliot and could see his jaw set and his face getting red. She could tell he was trying not to get mad. "El. I don't know what he's doing here. I don't even know how he knows where I live."

"What? Is this guy stalking you?"

"No! Or course not. I'm not sure why he's here. We don't have plans." Olivia started to get out of the car.

Elliot put a hand on her arm. "No Olivia. It's OK. I'll just go home. We can do this another time." It was killing him to say these words, but he wasn't going to stand out on the sidewalk and get into an argument about who got to spend the evening with Olivia. He thought back to his earlier thoughts; what if he was the one standing in the way of her happiness?

"El?" said Olivia, with a confused look on her face. Elliot wasn't one to back down; to give up without a fight. She couldn't believe that he was telling her to go with Matt. "But I really wanted to spend the evening with you."

"We can do it another time. I'm tired anyway." He said, looking away.

Matt had seen Olivia as she started to get out of the car, and had stood up and starting walking over. When he saw Olivia and Elliot talking, he stopped, letting them finish.

"Elliot…" said Olivia softly. She reached out a hand towards him.

"Just go Liv. He's waiting." He put the car in gear, as if he was going to drive away. "I'll see you at the house tomorrow morning." It was a clear indication that he wasn't going to pick her up in the morning.

Olivia got out of the car, puzzled by his behavior. "Bye." She said. Elliot barely gave her time to close the door before he took off.

_**Please let me know if you're still enjoying the story and if I should keep going! I appreciate all of your comments and feedback.**_


	14. Chapter 14

Matt watched the car pull away and came over to her. "Everything OK?" he asked.

Olivia watched Elliot's car as drove away. She turned towards Matt when he spoke to her.

"Matt. What are you doing here?" Olivia asked.

"I wanted to surprise you. We're not practicing tonight so I thought we could spend the evening together." Matt moved closer and leaned in to give her a hug.

Olivia put her arms out to stop him. "How did you know where I live?"

"I heard you give the cabbie your address after dinner the other night." Matt said, taking a step back. "I have to say, this isn't really the way I pictured this going tonight."

Olivia sighed. "Sorry. It's just been a really long day and I was just really surprised to see you here."

"Were you arguing with your partner when you pulled up? It looked like he wasn't too happy."

"No. It's fine. Let's go upstairs." Olivia walked towards the front door, unlocked it and let them in. They walked up the stairs to her 4th floor apartment.

"My apartment may be a bit of a mess." Said Olivia. "I wasn't expecting company." She opened the door, stepped inside and turned on the lights. Matt walked in behind her.

"I'm sure it's better than my place. Remember, I live with 4 other guys. It's like living in a frat house."

Olivia removed her badge and her gun. "I'll be right back. I have to put these away. Go ahead and help yourself to a beer." She walked into her bedroom, shutting the door behind her. She put her gun away and then went into the bathroom. She looked in the mirror. God, she was a mess. She quickly touched up her make-up and brushed her teeth, just so she could feel a little put together.

When she came back out of her bedroom, Matt was leaning up against the counter with an open beer in his hand. He lifted up the beer towards her. "You want one?"

Olivia opened the refrigerator and grabbed one. "Got it. Come on in." she walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. Matt followed her, sitting at the other end and turning to face her.

"I've got good news. We got a gig tomorrow night at a bar down in the lower east side. They had one of their bands pull out, so they asked us to fill in. We're going on from 8-10 until the main draw starts to play."

"That's great!" said Olivia. "I know you were worried about getting started here."

"Yeah. We're pretty jazzed." He paused and looked down at the beer in his hand. "So, I was thinking that maybe you could get a couple of friends and come down and hear us play." He looked up at her.

Olivia considered what he said. "Maybe that could work. It's not too late. You know, it is a school night." She said with a smile.

Matt smiled. "I would really like that." He put his beer bottle on the table, moved closer to her on the couch, and reached up and took her beer bottle from her hand and put it on the table next to his. He reached up and cupped her right cheek with his right hand, and leaned in and kissed her gently on the lips. When he didn't get any resistance, he kissed her again, this time with more urgency. Olivia hesitated, but then moved her arms up around his neck, leaning into the kiss. Matt took that opportunity to pull her closer, pulling her lower lip in between his, forcing her mouth slightly open. He slipped his tongue in and pretty soon, Olivia was responding, entangling her tongue with his. The kisses deepened, becoming more feverish. Matt leaned Olivia back on the couch, climbing over her, careful not to put his full weight on her.

He moved his lips from her mouth down to her neck, and heard a small moan escape her lips as he kissed beneath her ear. His left hand trailed down her side until it reached her hip, pulling the lower half of her body closer to his. Olivia moved her arms so she could run them up and down his back. Matt ran his hands up her side, pulling her shirt up with it. He ran his hands up the smooth skin of her waist, but his movements were limited due to her blouse. He snaked his hand up to the top button of her shirt, and got the first button undone, moving his mouth down to her collarbone. As his mouth started to move lower, a vision of Elliot popped into her head and Olivia gasped.

"Stop. Please. Stop" she said, she put her hands up against his chest and pushed him back lightly.

Matt looked at her, but then leaned in and captured his lips with his once again.

Olivia twisted her head. "Matt. I said stop." She pushed harder against his chest.

Matt looked at her. "What's wrong?"

She looked up at him. "Please, let me up."

Matt sat back, and Olivia scrambled out from underneath him, straightening her clothing.

"What the hell Olivia?" Matt said with frustration in his voice.

"I just…It's not ready for this." she said.

"Olivia" said Matt. "It's not like we're in high school and it's not like we haven't had sex before."

"What..so that means I'm just supposed to jump in bed with you right away?" Olivia got up from the couch and started walking towards the kitchen before she turned back towards him. "That was 20 years ago, and it's been less than a week since I first ran into you! Is that the only reason you wanted to see me?"

"No! Of course not. You know me better than that."

"You know what? I really don't know you at all. It's been a long time."

Matt stood up and walked over to Olivia. "I'm sorry. I just thought…we always had great chemistry Olivia. I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to push you. OK?"

Olivia softened a little and smiled at him. "OK."

"Do you want to order some food and just chill for a while? I would really like to spend some time with you." Matt said.

"I'd like that." said Olivia. She pulled out some takeout menus and they ordered something to eat.

Their food came, and they sat together on the couch, splitting up the food and opening up another beer. They found something to watch on TV and Olivia snuggled into Matt. A couple of hours later, Olivia woke up suddenly. Matt was lying down on the couch, and Olivia was snuggled next to him with her head on his chest. She looked up and saw he was still awake. She started to disentangle herself.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"You're fine." Matt pulled her back and kissed her. "You must have been tired."

Olivia leaned back in and kissed him back. They kept kissing for a while, but they kept their hands from wandering. Olivia relaxed back into him.

"What time is it?" she asked.

"10" said Matt.

"Wow, I slept a long time. I'm so sorry. I guess I'm not a very fun date." Olivia sat up and stretched. "But I do need to get to bed. I have to get up early tomorrow."

"Oh. You want me to leave?" asked Matt, sitting up.

Olivia looked at Matt. Had he planned on spending the night? From the look of it, the answer to that question was yes.

"Matt. I'm happy you stopped by but you can't stay here tonight."

"Oh. Yeah, I get it. OK." He hopped up off the couch.

"You should be able to catch a cab one block over."

"Nah, I'll take the subway."

"Matt. That's going to take forever." Olivia sighed, and wasn't sure why she was saying this. "You can sleep here tonight. On the couch. OK?"

Matt smiled. "The couch? Really?"

Olivia tilted her head and gave him a look. "Take it or leave it."

Matt put up his hands as if in surrender. "Just joking. I'll take it."

Olivia got a pillow and some blankets out of the closet and gave them to Matt. She leaned over and kissed him. "Good night."

Matt watched her as she walked into her bedroom and shut the door.

_**Please let me know if you're still enjoying the story and if I should keep going! I appreciate all of your comments and feedback.**_


	15. Chapter 15

It took everything in Elliot's power to pull away from the curb and leave Olivia behind. He didn't even look back as he drove off.

When he got to his apartment, he put away his gun and changed into some jeans and a t-shirt. He wandered out into the kitchen, and opened up the refrigerator, looking for something to eat. He pulled out some leftover pasta, and threw it in the microwave to heat it up. He pulled a cold beer out and popped the cap, taking a long pull and emptying half the bottle. By the time the pasta was heated, he had finished his beer. He grabbed another beer, opened it up, and took it and his pasta into the living room. He turned on the TV and found a Mets game. He wasn't a huge Mets fan, but it was better than nothing.

As he started to watch the game, his mind wandered back to Olivia. He had really been looking forward to spending the evening with her. Everything had been so messed up this week and he was looking for a way to reconnect. He was really trying to figure out where he stood with her. He had been trying to do the right thing; to stay out of her way while she figured out what she wanted. He wanted her; he wanted her badly. But it had to be her choice. He wasn't going to stand in her way if she had a chance to have a relationship and a family with Matt. Her happiness meant everything to him and if that was her choice, he would figure out how to deal with it. Her friendship and partnership meant everything to him and if that was all he could have, he would take it.

He tried to eat the pasta and finished his beer. He wondered with Olivia and Matt we're doing right now and tried to push those thoughts out of his mind. Instead, he thought about how Olivia had looked when she walked out of the cribs last night with her messed up hair and her flushed face…and he thought about kissing her and wrapping his arms around her. He closed his eyes, picturing her face in his mind. He could get lost in her eyes. She looked up at him and smiled and he leaned down and kissed her, inhaling her scent and tasting her lips. She wrapped her arms around him, pressing her body into him and her body felt so good against his. He leaned back against the couch, letting himself get lost in his thoughts. He let his mind wander a little more, picturing himself running his hands down her body, reaching down and cupping her ass, pulling her lower body towards his, and he felt himself starting to get aroused. His eyes flew open and he sat up. No. This was no good. He had to stop this. She was with Matt, not with him. If he couldn't stop thinking of her like that, it would drive him insane. He got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen. He knew a couple of beers weren't going to stop him from the images of Olivia that kept popping in his head. He looked in his cupboards until he found a bottle of Scotch. He poured himself a shot and drank it. It burned as it went down.

Good. That's what he needed. Something that would make him forget. He poured another shot, and then another until he felt his mind start to go numb. He grabbed the bottle and the glass and went back into the living room. He tried to focus on the baseball game, but once more, his mind turned back to Olivia. But this time, it was Matt that was kissing her and Matt with his hands on her. Suddenly, he saw an image of her face pop in his head, her head thrown back, her eyes closed and her hair messed up, and he saw Matt looming over her in bed…

He grabbed the bottle and poured himself a double, knocking it back in one swallow. And the last thought he had as he passed out was that Olivia was going to be his undoing.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia crawled into bed and let out a heavy sigh. What the hell was she doing? She was a grown woman, and she had been spooked by the prospect of having sex with him? She made him sleep on the couch. Like she was some 15 year old protecting her virginity. Matt was right. They had slept together for a year; why was she holding back now? What was she waiting for? She started to sit up in bed, ready to go out to the living room and bring Matt back into her bedroom. She stopped and looked over at her phone. She half expected a call or a text from Elliot. They always seemed to know what was going on with each other; to sense when they needed each other. A call or a text between them was always well timed. But her phone remained silent. She picked it up and thumbed it open, checking her messages to make sure she hadn't missed one. She contemplated texting him and checking in. She looked at the clock. It was 11PM. Most likely he was up, but what would she say? She lay back down with a heavy sigh, keeping her phone in her hand. She wasn't going to invite Matt into her bed tonight.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot startled awake, unsure of where he was. He quickly realized he was asleep on his couch, still in a sitting position. He saw the bottle of scotch and the glass on the end table, and realized he was still drunk. He looked at his phone, and saw it was 3AM. He checked to see if he had any messages and was disappointed when he didn't have any. He debated texting Olivia, to see if she was awake…but deep down he knew that drunk texting was not a good idea. What was he going to say to her?

He got up and made his way to his bedroom. He sprawled out in his clothes and fell back asleep with his phone in his hand.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

The next morning, Olivia got up at 6AM, took a shower and got ready for work. A little before 7, she walked into the living room, and shook Matt awake. He looked at her with confusion, looking around to get his bearings. "Olivia?" he questioned. "What time is it?"

"It's 7. Time to get up. I have to get going in a few minutes."

"Seriously? Can I just sleep some more and leave later?"

"No. I have to lock up. You can share a cab with me to the precinct and then take it the rest of the way home, or grab the subway from there." She wandered over to the kitchen and poured herself some juice.

Matt got up and wandered into her bedroom. She heard the bathroom door close. He came out a few minutes later and walked towards the kitchen. He saw Olivia putting on her gun and her badge and buckling her belt. He smiled.

"Well, aren't you a badass." he said. "Are you going to shoot me if I try to kiss you?"

Olivia knew he was referring to last night, and his being forced to sleep on the couch.

"Matt, I'm sorry. I don't know what happened last night. It was stupid, but I just…"

"Olivia. It's fine. I know I showed up here unannounced and took you by surprise. I shouldn't have expected to stay." He reached up and placed his hands on her upper arms, looking into her eyes. "That's not why I came here. I really just wanted to see you."

Olivia smiled. "I know. And I'll make it up to you." She leaned in and kissed him. Matt pulled her towards him and deepened the kiss.

Olivia pushed him back. "I really have to get going. I'm usually in the house by now."

"But you're coming to the bar tonight, right? You'll bring some friends and come hear us play?" Matt said anxiously. "Jeff and Lucas are anxious to see you and the other guys want to meet you."

"I'm sure." said Olivia. "They don't even know me."

"Well…I may have been talking about you…a lot." He smiled sheepishly.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "Great. I hope they have low expectations." She said.

Matt pulled her hair back and tucked it behind her ear. "Low expectations? Are you kidding me? I'm going to be with the most beautiful woman in the bar."

Olivia blushed and turned to grab her keys off the counter.

"Why do you always do that?" asked Matt.

"Do what?" said Olivia.

"Every time I pay you a compliment, you brush it off. Do you really not know how incredibly beautiful you are? Stunning. And sexy as hell."

Olivia looked at him. "Well, you know. That's not really an asset in my business. And you know how my mother was…she made sure I felt like being attractive to the opposite sex was only going to be trouble…so I guess I just…I don't know. Let's change the subject. I don't like talking about myself. Now, I really have to go." She waved her arm towards the door and started walking that way, with Matt following close behind her.

When they got downstairs, Olivia saw a cab halfway down the block, and waved it down. Matt turned to her.

"I'm just going to grab the subway from here. It's faster. See you tonight?"

Olivia smiled. He took her hand and kissed her as she got into the cab and drove off.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Across the street and down about a block and a half, Elliot watched from his car. He had been waiting for her to leave her building that morning, and had been sitting here since 6:30. The thought crossed his mind that his behavior might be close to that of a stalker…but he let that thought go. This was his partner and he was just making sure she was OK. He was hoping that she came out of her apartment building alone.

When 7AM came and went, he thought maybe he had missed her. She didn't usually leave any earlier than 6:30, and he knew she hadn't been called in because they would have called him too. He was going to give her 15 more minutes before he left. He took a sip of his coffee, and popped a few more ibuprofen. His head was killing him. A few minutes later, he saw her come out of her apartment building and DAMN…that prick Matt was with her. He pounded his hands on the steering wheel and watched as Olivia hailed a cab. Then Matt grabbed her hand before she could get in the cab and she turned towards him, so Elliot could get a good look at her face. And she looked so happy. Then he watched at Matt kissed her and she got into the cab. The cab took off, driving right by him, so Elliot ducked down in the seat a little. But he didn't need to as Olivia was looking straight ahead, talking to the cabbie.

Elliot let out a yell and pounded the steering wheel again. He couldn't see her today at the house. He wouldn't be able to get that picture out of his head. That big smile and that kiss. Damn it!

Elliot picked up his phone and dialed Cragen's number.

"Cap'n. Hey, I hate to do this, but I need a few hours of personal time; maybe the day. I have some stuff I have to take care of." Said Elliot.

Cragen was surprised. He couldn't remember the last time Elliot had taken some personal time, especially on such short notice.

"Fine Elliot. Anything I can do?" asked the Captain. Elliot was like a son to him and he knew he was going through a hard time after the divorce.

"No. It's fine. Thanks Cap'n" Elliot said and hung up. He pulled away from the curb, not really sure where he was going. Before he knew it, he realized he was heading to Queens, to his house. His old house.


	16. Chapter 16

_**OK, hope you are enjoying the story. I took some liberties with Kathy and Elliot's relationship and divorce. But what's contained in this story is kind of how I imagine it would have gone if they had actually gotten divorced (like they should have). Enjoy.**_

Olivia got to the station house and saw that Fin and Munch were already at their desks. She looked over at Elliot's desk, and saw that he wasn't there.

"Where's Elliot?" she asked. "He's usually here by now."

"Don't know. Haven't seen him." said Fin, shrugging his shoulders.

The Captain came out of his office. "Olivia, my office please."

Olivia was startled by his tone. Had something happened to Elliot? Her heart began to beat quickly, and she looked at Munch and Fin. They obviously didn't know anything because they would have said something. They would have told her when she came in. Olivia rushed over to the Captain's office, and he shut the door behind her.

"Is everything OK?" asked Olivia.

The Captain walked around behind his desk and faced her. "I was hoping you could tell me." He looked at her questioningly.

Olivia got a puzzled look on her face. "I'm sorry but I don't know what you're talking about."

The Captain looked at her for a moment, as if to see if she was telling the truth. He knew that she and Elliot covered for each other all the time, but this time, it truly appeared that she didn't have any idea what he was talking about.

"Elliot called me this morning, and told me that he needed some personal time. At least a few hours, but perhaps the day." He paused and waited for a reaction from Olivia. "Do you know anything about this?"

"No. This is the first I am hearing of it." She said truthfully. But her mind was racing. That was so unlike Elliot. "What time did he call you?"

"Just a little after 7 this morning. Did he say anything to you last night? Was he OK when you left the precinct?"

Olivia thought back to the previous night. "He dropped me off and he said he was really tired. But he didn't say anything to me…" she trailed off, thinking about how upset Elliot was when he had seen Matt sitting on her steps.

"Liv. It seems like you and Elliot are at odds with each other this week. And when you two aren't getting along, it affects your work. Are you going to tell me what's going on? Did you guys have some kind of argument? Or is there something else you need to tell me?" The Captain had watched Elliot's and Olivia's relationship over the years, noting how close they had become. He had watched for an impact on their work, had sent them to multiple psychiatrists, and watched for signs that they had stepped over the line. But up to this point, he hadn't seen anything too alarming. But the atmosphere this week was different; something had shifted.

Olivia looked down at the floor, hearing the insinuation in the Captain's voice. She looked back up at the Captain. "There's nothing going on. At least not what you're thinking…"

"Liv. I didn't mean…"

"It's fine Captain. I don't know what's going on with Elliot but he and I are fine. I'll talk to him."

Olivia smiled and started to leave.

"Olivia" said the Captain, stopping her. "You know that you and Elliot are like my son and daughter. If there is anything that either of you need to talk to me about, I'm here."

"Thanks Captain." Said Olivia, giving him a genuine smile and walking back into the squad room.

As she walked back to her desk, Fin and Munch looked up at her. "What did you do now baby girl?" asked Fin.

"Nothing. He was just checking in." said Olivia, avoiding the topic of Elliot. She didn't want to let Fin and Munch in on the conversation. She was saved by further interrogation when Casey walked in.

"Hey Liv. Can I talk to you about the Muncie case?" she asked. She was referring to the case going to court next week.

"Sure." Said Olivia. "Oh, and before I forget. What's everyone doing tonight? Matt's band got a last minute gig at a bar on the lower east side and he wants me to come and bring some friends. Can anyone make it? They're going to start playing around 8 and will finish up about 10. I guess there's another band after them." She looked at Casey "Please? I don't want to go alone."

Casey sighed. "I guess I can go. Maybe I'll see if Chester wants to go." Olivia laughed, as Casey always insisted that she and Chester weren't involved but they spent more time together than some married couples she knew.

She turned to Fin, who was always up for going out. "What about you Fin? Can you and Cherie come?" she asked, referring to Fin's latest girlfriend.

Fin leaned back in his chair. "Anything for you baby girl. I'll call Cherie and see if she can go, but even if she can't, I'll be there."

Olivia looked over at John. She knew this wasn't really his kind of thing. "John, if you don't want to come, I understand."

"Thanks Liv. I didn't want to say no to you, but I'd rather pass." Olivia smiled, know her friend well.

"It's fine John. I know."

Olivia gave everyone the name of the bar, in case she didn't have a chance later in the day. She and Casey went into one of the interrogation rooms and worked on the case for an hour or so. Casey tried to get some more details about Matt out of Olivia, but she wasn't biting. They finally finished up and agreed they would see each other at the bar.

Olivia went back to her desk, looking over at Elliot's empty chair. She was wondering where he was and what he was doing.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot showed up at his house and parked out on the street. He looked at his watch and saw it was a little after 8. The kids would have gone to school, but he wondered if Kathy was still home. He got out of the car, and went up to the front door. He knocked, which always seemed strange to him. He had to knock on the door of the home he had lived in for 20 years. He didn't think he would ever get used to that.

He peered through the window and saw Kathy coming to the door. She looked startled when she saw Elliot peering through the window. She opened the door quickly, and pushed open the screen door.

"Elliot. What are you doing here? Is everything OK?" she asked as Elliot walked into the house.

"Hey Kathy. The kids at school?" he asked, continuing to walk into the house and into the kitchen. He sat down on a stool at the kitchen counter as Kathy followed him into the kitchen.

"Yes. It's after 8. You know they're in school." Kathy gave Elliot a look of concern.

"Are you OK? What's going on?" she asked again.

Elliot sighed. "I don't know. I just found myself driving here this morning."

Kathy poured Elliot a cup of coffee and set it down in front of him. She knew she wouldn't be able to pull any information out of him. He would tell her when he was ready.

Elliot took a sip of coffee. "Any surprises for conferences tonight for Dick and Elizabeth?" he asked.

"No." said Kathy. "Shouldn't be."

"How's work?" he asked.

"Good. We finally hired a couple of new nurses and they're working out really well. It really helps out on the floor; not so much overtimes and shorter shifts for everyone. Now everyone works 8-10 hour shifts. I know the twins don't need me home all the time, but it's nice to get home at a decent hour and be able to make dinner."

"That's good. Is today your day off?"

"Yes. I'm going to do some volunteer work at the school this afternoon, making food for the teachers that are stuck there for conferences. And the, of course, then we have the kids conferences."

"Hmm." He said.

Kathy could tell that Elliot was only half listening to what she was saying. "So, how's work going for you?" she asked. It was very unusual for Elliot to miss a day of work. "Did something happen with one of your cases?"

"Nah. Same old, same old." He said, taking another drink of coffee. "Still lots of perverts out there. Liv says it's like a giant game of Whack-A-Mole. I guess she's right."  
"How is Olivia? I haven't seen her for a while."

Elliot's head jerked up slightly, and Kathy knew she had hit the nail on the head. Something had happened with Olivia and it had rattled Elliot. "Is she OK?"

"She's fine. She's seeing someone." said Elliot, staring down back at his coffee cup.

"Oh." said Kathy, suddenly understanding why Elliot was upset. Kathy knew the relationship between Elliot and Olivia was complicated. Olivia had been a force in their marriage, and in their divorce. Kathy knew they were more than friends. She knew that the things they saw every day were things they couldn't share with anyone but each other. She knew they relied on each other with their lives. But she also sensed something more whenever they were together. It was undeniable. But when they fought about Olivia; when Kathy's jealousy got the better of her, Elliot had sworn nothing had ever happened between them. She believed him, but she knew that part of that reason was Olivia. If Olivia had been complicit and given in to those feelings, she didn't doubt Elliot would have fallen. It was part of the reason she finally let him go. Elliot may have loved her at one time, but he knew he was _in love_ with Olivia. She had grown tired of battling it.

Kathy didn't say anything else for a minute, seeing if Elliot was going to offer up any other information. He sat looking at his coffee cup for another minute.

"She ran into a guy she dated in college when we were all out for drinks last weekend." He shook his head. It was hard to believe that was less than a week ago. "I guess they were pretty serious in college. He just moved back into the city."

Kathy debated what to say next. Elliot obviously needed to get this out of his system. Before she could say anything, Elliot stood up.  
"I mean, what are the chances that she would run into this guy? In the one bar we happened to be in? In Manhattan? He lives in Brooklyn for God's sake. She didn't even want to go out, and I talked her into it." He let out a strangled laugh. He walked over to the coffee pot and refilled his mug. He turned around and leaned against the counter.

Kathy just looked at him. "Did you meet him?"

"Yeah, for just a few minutes at the bar. She introduced him to all of us. He's in a band for Christ's sake."

"And? What did you think of him?" Kathy looked at him questioningly.

Elliot shrugged. "Hard to tell. He showed up at the precinct the other day, but Olivia hustled him out of there. And then he was waiting at her apartment when I dropped her off last night."

"So…Olivia really hasn't said too much about him?" Kathy prodded some more. She was trying to figure out if Elliot had a problem with the guy, or just a problem with Olivia dating someone. She figured it was the latter.

"No. She hasn't. But, I really haven't seen her much this week either."

Now Kathy knew what else was bothering him. He didn't do well with extended absences from Olivia. It was like they fed off each other, and when one of them was gone, it threw the other one off.

"Elliot." Kathy said, walking up to him and putting her hand on his arm. Elliot looked down at her.

"You know what this is really about…right?"

Elliot just continued to look at her. Kathy sighed and turned around, taking his stool at the counter and looking at him.

"Elliot, we've been divorced for over 6 months. We both know there were a lot of reasons why we got divorced. But you have to know that part of it was because we fell out of love."

"Kathy" Elliot interrupted. "I have always loved you."

"I know." Said Kathy. "You loved me, and you were devoted to our marriage and our family. But you gave your heart to Olivia years ago."

"Kathy" Elliot protested.

"Elliot. I've made my peace with it. There was nothing I could have done about it. It started when you two met each other. You two are part of each other. I expected that after the divorce, you two…" she didn't finish the sentence, looking down at the counter. Elliot looked over at her, and saw tears brimming on her lower lashes. Elliot walked over to her, and pulled her up from the stool. He wrapped her in his arms, and kissed her temple.

"Kathy. I wouldn't trade our life together for anything. You gave me a wonderful family. You will always have a part of my heart."

"I know." Kathy whispered. "But now it's time for us to move on. I will always love you Elliot. Now go." She pushed away from him and walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs. Elliot watched her go, and then walked out of the house.

_**I really hope you liked this chapter. This is a key turning point for Elliot. Now what will happen? Please provide reviews and comments and let me know if you are enjoying the story and if you want me to continue. Thank you.**_


	17. Chapter 17

_**OK, here we go. This story is probably going to start to turn to an M rating; not sure yet how far it will go. But I will give advanced warning if or when it does. It's not in this chapter. In this chapter, we have to make Elliot suffer a little bit more! Before then, we have to make Elliot suffer a little bit more.**_

Elliot sat in his car, unsure of what to do next. Kathy had dropped a bomb on him. When they had fought, and that had become more frequent as the years passed, Olivia's name came up every once in a while. Kathy would accuse him of sleeping with her; of having a physical attraction to her. But never once had she 'accused' him of being in love with her. And while he was married, he had told himself that he and Olivia were good friends…partners. And while he found himself having some sordid fantasies about her, he had never really considered how deep his feelings went. He wasn't going to cheat on his wife; he wasn't going to leave her, so he hadn't let himself think about it.

And now, what had been going on since the divorce? At first, he just had to take time to adjust to being single again, settling into a new routine, a new home, and new way of well, of being. And when he started to get used to that, he had started to think more and more about Olivia. The what if's...

Part of the reason he hadn't pursued it was because he wasn't sure she felt the same way, and he was afraid of rejection. But who was he kidding? He pretty much knew how she felt, even though she had also denied her feelings for years. They were both really good at pretending. So, mostly he was just afraid she wouldn't want to move forward with a relationship and that he would be shattered.

Another reason he hadn't pursued it was because of their jobs. IF they became involved, they couldn't be partners any more. He couldn't imagine working without her every day. But now he let himself examine that thought some more. If he could come home to her every day, if he could share a home with her, share a bed with her…wasn't that so much more?

There was only one other reason he hadn't pursued it, and that was his family. He knew his kids loved Olivia, but he had been afraid of what Kathy would think…of what she would think had been happening all along. But hell, she had blown that out of the water today. Hell, he practically had her PERMISSION.

All of a sudden, Elliot knew he had to tell Olivia how he felt and everything else be damned. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't. If she told him she didn't feel the same way, he would figure out how to go forward. But if he didn't give them a chance and just let her go…he would never forgive himself.

But now the question was how? He couldn't pull her into the cribs and have that conversation. And he couldn't make a big production out of it; she would know something was up and it might scare her off. Because he knew that as scared as he was to tell her-she would be equally as afraid to hear what he had to say. For so long, the status quo had been their friend, never forcing them to think or feel too deeply. No, the best option was to make it seem like an ordinary night. For both of them to be relaxed and be in a place where they could just talk.

The next question was when? Tonight wouldn't work because he had the kids' conferences and he didn't know when he would be back home. Maybe tomorrow night? That would be Friday night, and they weren't on call. They had lots of movies nights on Friday's…she wouldn't think anything was strange about that. He would ask her to hand out for a movie night.

Elliot took a deep breath. Now that he had decided to do this…he felt an odd sense of calm. Like a giant weight had been lifted. He laid his head back on the headrest of the car and let out a sigh. He was in love with Olivia Benson. He smiled. "I love you" he said out loud, testing the words.

Elliot's phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at the caller ID. It was Liv. He smiled. Apparently their psychic connection was still intact. He hit the connect button.

"Hi Liv." he said with a smile.

"El." she said, almost surprised to hear him answer. She had actually expected it to go to voicemail. "I was just checking in with you to see if everything's OK. Is one of the kids sick or something?"

"Nah. Everyone's fine."

"Oh. It's just not like you to take personal time. So I was worried that something was wrong."

Just hearing her voice made him smile. "Miss me?"

"Not really." joked Olivia. "I'm just sick of doing all of this paperwork by myself."

Elliot laughed. "I just had a couple of things I had to take care of. I'll be back this afternoon."

"OK. Good. I will make sure I leave a stack for you." Olivia was glad to hear that Elliot was in a good mood. That confirmed that everything was OK. "I'll see you this afternoon."

"Yeah. Hey, one more thing before you go. Do you think we could have a movie night tomorrow night? We haven't had one for a while, and we've hardly seen each other in the past week…"

Olivia thought about it for a few seconds. She didn't know where things were going with Matt, but she really enjoyed spending time with Elliot. She didn't plan on giving up her friendship with Elliot no matter what happened with Matt. "I would love that Elliot. And I will even let you pick the movie." Olivia's phone beeped. "I have to go El. I have another call coming in. See you this afternoon."

Elliot dropped his phone on the center console, and started up the car. He had to go home and get changed and back to the squad room. He hoped that he could keep himself together. He knew that as soon as he saw her, he was going to have a hard time keeping his mouth shut.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia grabbed the call on the other line. It was Casey.

"Hey Liv. I just wanted to let you know that Chester's going to go tonight, but he has to meet us there. Do you want to go down together? You can cab over and pick me up on the way…"

"That sounds perfect. I didn't really want to show up alone." Olivia paused. "Hey Casey, do you want to have lunch today? I need some advice."

"Sure. That works out great if we can do it early because my trial time got pushed. Meet me at Nate's diner? 11:30."

"Sounds great." said Olivia.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia walked out of the squad room around 11 to catch a cab and meet Casey for lunch. As she walked out of the precinct, Elliot pulled up in his car. She saw him and stopped, glad to see him. She felt like she hadn't seen him forever.

"Hey!" he said as he walked over to her. It was all he could do to keep from hugging her. He was so happy to see her. "I just come in and you leave? I swear you're trying to avoid me." he said, smiling.

Olivia smiled. "I told you I wasn't going to get stuck with all of that paperwork."

"Nice. Really, where are you going? Did you catch a case?"

"No." said Olivia. "I'm having lunch with Casey. We have some stuff we need to catch up on."

"OK, then I won't ask to tag along. I'll see you when you get back." Elliot said. He held out his keys. "Do you want to take my car?"

Olivia smiled. "Thanks El. You're sure you don't mind?"

"Nope. I don't mind." He handed her the keys. "But if you crash it, don't come back." He joked with her.

Olivia laughed. "Got it. See you soon." She got into his car and started backing out as he walked into the precinct.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

When Olivia got to the diner, Casey was already there. She sat down with her friend and ordered a salad when the waitress came with some water. They talked about their upcoming court case and a couple of open cases, with Olivia bringing Casey up to speed on the latest details.

"So…" said Casey. "What did you want to talk about?" She was hoping Olivia wanted to fill her in on what was going on with Matt.

Olivia looked down at her salad, feeling a little awkward.

"So, last night, Matt surprised me. He was at my apartment when Elliot dropped me off."

"Oh. And?" said Casey.

"I let him up and we had a few drinks and one thing led to another…"

Casey let out a small squeal. "That's great Liv. He is SO sexy. Oh my God. Is he fantastic in bed? I mean, I know you have already slept with him, but that was so long ago. Did it seem like it was just yesterday?" she fired questions at Olivia.

"Casey…I didn't. I couldn't." Olivia said, shaking her head.

"What do you mean you couldn't?" asked Casey.

"I just couldn't. I mean, I wanted to..."

"But?"

Olivia didn't say anything for a few moments. "Do you remember what you asked me the other day?"

Casey thought back over the last few days. She couldn't think of anything they had talked about that wasn't work related. Suddenly, it hit her. "Elliot. This is about Elliot?"

Olivia looked up at her, giving her confirmation with a small nod.

"You and Elliot?" asked Casey.

"No!" said Olivia. "But…when I was kissing Matt, all I could think about was that I wished it was Elliot."

"Liv. I know how you and Elliot feel about each other. Everyone does. I don't know if anyone believes that the two of you haven't slept together."

"We haven't." said Olivia softly. "We won't. Elliot's been divorced for almost 6 months. If he was interested in changing our relationship, he would have by now. So I have to figure out how to move on. I have a real chance at a relationship with Matt, so why am I sabotaging that? I need someone to tell me that I'm doing the right thing. God, he must have thought I was a basket case last night. I made him sleep on the couch."

Casey looked at Olivia with surprise. "You made him sleep on the couch?" she started to laugh. "I'm sorry Liv. I just can't picture it. And he actually stayed?"

Olivia laughed a little herself, realizing how ridiculous it sounded. "Yeah. I guess that means he's a pretty decent guy, huh?"

Casey nodded. "Sounds like it." she reached across the table and put her hand on top of Olivia's. "Liv, I don't know what to say about Elliot. I know you love him…"

Olivia's head jerked up. "I didn't say I loved him."

"Liv…" said Casey.

Olivia looked away. "Casey, he's made it clear to me that he doesn't want me…like that. I guess maybe I read too much into..well…into everything. It doesn't matter how I feel."

Casey drew her hand back across the table. "And you don't want to talk to him about it?"

"No! If I tell him how I'm feeling, it could ruin everything. We can still be partners and friends. I can't lose him completely."

"I can't tell you what to do Olivia, but you know I'm always here to listen." said Casey. "But Matt seems like a decent guy. It seems like maybe you should give him a chance."

"Yeah. I know you're right."

Casey looked at her friend. "So what are you going to do?"

Olivia took a deep breath and smiled. "I'm going to go to the bar tonight, listen to the band, and go home with the lead singer."

_**OK people. Please give me some reviews and let me know if you're still enjoying the story. I am working on the next chapter but I love to hear from people!**_


	18. Chapter 18

_**This chapter is still rated T, but we're getting closer to M. Read and enjoy and shoot me a review!**_

Olivia and Casey finished up their lunch, paid their bill and started to walk out of the diner.

"Liv, what are you going to wear tonight?" asked Casey.

"I don't know." said Olivia. "I haven't really thought about it."

"And that's the problem." said Casey. "No offense Liv, but I don't think you really have the wardrobe to be the girlfriend of a guy in a band. Everything you have is so…conservative. You dress like a cop."

"I am a cop. And I do not dress conservatively. I have lots of casual clothes."

"Liv. You've got suits and dresses. I don't recall seeing anything sexy in your closet. You've got the body. Now show it off a little."

Olivia rolled her eyes. "Casey, really? I think Matt's made it clear that he wants to sleep with me. I really don't need to do anything to entice him."

"C'mon Liv. Loosen up. Let's go shopping and buy something new for you to wear."

Olivia looked at her watch. "I have to get back."

"It'll take 15 minutes. I have the perfect spot. It's a 5 minute walk from here."

Casey dragged Olivia into a little boutique and started searching through the racks. She pulled out a short black leather jacket. "This is perfect! Try it on." She handed it to Olivia and kept searching. As Olivia tried on the jacket, Casey pulled out a lacy camisole. It was an emerald green, with cream lace edging the bodice and going over the shoulder as straps. She held it up for Olivia.

"This would look fantastic on you."

"Casey, I'm not going to wear underwear to the bar."

"It's not underwear. It would look amazing against your skin, and with that jacket and a pair of jeans. C'mon. Live a little. It will drive Matt wild."

Olivia looked doubtful. "OK. But if I'm going to get something new, then you have to too. For Chester…" she teased Casey.

"Deal."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia rushed into the squad room a little after 1:30. She was carrying her bag from the store in her hand, and she quickly shoved it into her bottom desk drawer, looking at the Captain's office. She looked over at Elliot and saw him watching her and smirking. "Long lunch…" he said.

"I just had to pick up a few things. Does the Captain know I've been gone this long?"

"He's down at 1PP. Meeting with the brass."

Olivia sat down in her chair and smiled. "Works for me." She looked over at Elliot. He was leaning back in his chair, staring at her and smiling.

"What?" said Olivia.

Elliot forced the smile from his face. "Nothing." He sat back up and started back in on the files. A few minutes later, the Captain walked back in. He looked over at Elliot. "Stabler. My office."

Olivia raised an eyebrow and looked over at Elliot. "What did you do now?"

"Nothing! I don't know what this could be about." Elliot said.

"Well, you better not keep him waiting." Olivia motioned towards the Captain's office.

Elliot got up and went into the Captain's office, shutting the door behind him.

He emerged a few minutes later.

"That was fast." said Olivia.

"Yeah. He was just checking in to make sure everything is alright."

Olivia laughed. "I had the same conversation this morning. We're under the microscope I guess."

They kept working over the course of the afternoon, cleaning up paperwork. When Elliot thought she wasn't looking, he would steal a look at her. She was concentrating on her paperwork, tapping a pen on her bottom lip while she was thinking. Then she would start to write, and bite her bottom lip with her teeth. Every once in a while, she would look up and catch him looking at her and he would quickly look back down at his files. He wasn't getting much done, but he couldn't help himself. Now that he had admitted to himself that he loved her…he just wanted to tell her. He wanted to pull her out of her chair, wrap his arms around her and kiss her. He shook his head. He had to get a hold of himself if he was going to make it until tomorrow night.

Before he knew it, it was 3:30, and he had to leave for the kids' school conferences. He stood up from his chair and started to gather his things.

"Leaving so soon?" asked Olivia, looking up from her paperwork.

"Yep. I have to get back to Queens for Dick and Elizabeth's school conferences. I told Kathy I would be there."

"Sounds good. See you tomorrow."

"Have a good night." said Elliot, walking out of the room. Olivia smiled. She was planning on it.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia left the station around 5:00. She wanted to get home and take a shower and get ready for her evening. She had to get ready, and get all the way over to Casey's before they went to the bar. And she wanted to get there before they started to play.

When she got home, she texted Matt. "Really looking forward to hearing the band tonight. I will be there between 7 and 730"

She didn't hear back right away, so she jumped in the shower. She took her time, relaxing under the hot spray. When she got out of the shower, she toweled off and wrapped a towel around her hair. She walked into the bedroom and grabbed her lotion, rubbing it over her legs and thighs, and then the rest of her body. She went to her underwear drawer and looked through her options. She selected a lacy black bra and barely there panties and tossed them on the bed. Then she went back into the bathroom and did her hair and her make-up, making her eyes a little darker with eyeliner and mascara then she would normally wear during the day. She added some darker lipstick to complete the look.

Olivia walked back into her bedroom and started to get dressed. Once she had her panties and bra on, she pulled some jeans out of her drawer and slid them on. Then she went to her bed and pulled out her new purchases. She pulled the lacy green camisole over her head, and turned around to look in the full length mirror. The black bra showed under the lacy cream straps of the camisole. Damn it. She unhooked the bra and removed it. Maybe she should really live dangerously and not wear a bra. She looked in the mirror again, turning to the right and to the left, trying to decide. She shook her head. The camisole was racy enough for her; she wouldn't be comfortable without a bra. She dug through her drawer and found a pale cream lace bra and matching thong. So she stripped out of her clothes and started over with the cream underwear. Once she had her jeans and camisole back on, she took another look in the mirror. She couldn't remember the last time she had dressed like this…but she had to admit, she looked good. Damn Casey. She grabbed the leather jacket and added it to her ensemble, and then added some short black boots. She put her ID and money in her jeans pocket, and grabbed her phone. She saw she had a return text from Matt.

"We're here having a few drinks before we play. You can have our table when you get here. Looking forward to seeing you."

Olivia smiled. She opened up a new message and addressed it to Casey. "I'm on my way. I'll text when I get there." She took one last look around the apartment, making sure it was presentable for when she and Matt came back later tonight. She grabbed her keys off the counter, and headed out the door.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia walked out of her apartment building, and was lucky enough to snag a cab a half a block down. She gave the cabbie Casey's address and settled back in the seat. Traffic was a mess, so it took over a half hour to get to the Upper East Side from her apartment. When she was just a few minutes away, she texted her friend to meet her downstairs. When they arrived, the doorman opened her door, and she got out.

"Hello ma'am" he said. "Can I help you?"

"No, I'm waiting for Casey." said Olivia. She still got a kick out of the fact that Casey's building had a doorman. ADA's made more money than cops for sure.

"I will let Ms. Novak know you're here." he said. As he turned towards the building, Casey came out. She looked fantastic in black jeans and boots, a blood red silk blouse and a black leather jacket. "Wow!" said Olivia. "You look great!"

"Back at you." said Casey. "I honestly expected you to show up in something else. I didn't think you'd wear what you bought. But you look fantastic. Matt is going to love it."

They both got back into the cab and gave the cabbie the address of the bar. Olivia felt nervous as they got closer.

"Are you OK?" asked Casey.

"Yeah, why?"

"You got really quiet."

"I'm fine. Just a little nervous. I need a drink!"

The cab pulled up to the bar, and they paid him and got out. There was a bouncer at the door, and he checked their ID's. There was a cover charge, but when the bouncer saw her name, he told her they were on the guest list and that they didn't have to pay the cover. He stamped their hands and they went in. The bar was relatively small. The bar was immediately off to their left and the stage was straight ahead. There was a really small dance floor immediately in front of the stage, and tables and chairs surrounded it on all sides.

Olivia and Casey walked in farther, trying to search for Matt. There were quite a few people there already, and it didn't help that Casey had only met Matt once, and that they didn't know what any of the other guys looked like. As they looked around, they had several offers from guys that wanted to buy them a drink, and Olivia felt more than one hand on her ass. She was starting to get annoyed when she saw Matt at a table near the front, close to the dance floor.

She grabbed Casey and pointed, since the bar was so loud, you couldn't really hear much. They started to make their way over to the table, and finally Matt looked up and saw her. She waved at him to let him know that she had seen him. She saw his eyes widen in surprise, and he looked her up and down as she walked towards him. She knew she was probably blushing a little, but she felt flattered. Casey had been right. They finally reached the table and Matt reached out a hand and pulled her towards him, giving her a kiss and wrapping his arm around her waist.

"Guys!" he yelled above the din of the crowd. "This is Olivia." He then pointed at Casey as she made her way to the table and stood next to Olivia. "And this is Casey." Olivia looked at the four guys seated at the table, and thought she recognized one of them. Matt pointed to each one. "That's Lucas, Tony, Logan and Jeff." Jeff was the one Olivia recognized, and he stood up and gave her a hug.

"Nice to see you again. It's been a long time. I still haven't forgiven Matt for stealing you away, and seeing you now, I have every right to still be mad! You look gorgeous."

"That's enough." said Matt, pushing Jeff away from Olivia and laughing. "Make room for the ladies."

They pulled over a couple of extra chairs and squeezed together so Olivia could sit next to Matt and Casey next to Olivia.  
"Let me get you guys a drink and then we have to head backstage. We're on in 30 minutes. What do you want?

Olivia motioned at the pitcher of beer. "We're not picky. Beer is fine. Is that OK with you Casey?" she asked, looking over at her friend. But Casey was already talking and flirting with Lucas. Matt poured them each a glass of beer and sat down next to Olivia. He rested a hand on her thigh, and leaned in close to her ear.

"You look incredibly sexy tonight." He placed a kiss right below her ear, and then trailed a few kisses up her cheek until he reached her mouth. He kissed her tentatively, and then with more urgency, and Olivia gave in to the kiss. He pulled away after a minute and smiled at her. "God, you smell fantastic and you look amazing…" he stood up and pulled her up. "Tell Casey you'll be right back."

Olivia looked at him questioningly.

"Just tell her."

Olivia leaned down and whispered in Casey's ear. Then she turned back to Matt. He took her hand and pulled her towards a door next to the stage. When they went through the door, Olivia saw they were in some kind of hallway, with doors farther down. She assumed this was 'backstage', the staging areas for the bands. She could hear guys talking but she didn't see anyone.

As soon as they were through the door, Matt pulled her close to him and pushed her back against the wall. He took her arms and held them next to her head, pinning her wrists against the wall. He leaned in and kissed her, taking her bottom lip in his. He forced Olivia's mouth open, slipping his tongue in her mouth. Olivia tried to free her wrists, but Matt held her tightly, and pushed his lower body against hers. Olivia gasped and Matt's mouth left hers. He moved his lips down to her neck and started kissing his way down her neck to her shoulder, keeping the pressure of his lower body on hers. Olivia tilted her head back, giving him better access.

Matt released her wrists and moved his hands down to her hips. He moved his hands around, and pulled her hips towards him, moaning as the pressure against his groin increased. After a moment, he stopped kissing her neck and laid his forehead on her shoulder. "God Olivia."

He looked up at her. Her face was flushed and she was breathing heavily. "Sorry. I just couldn't control myself."

Olivia smiled and bit her lower lip. "I guess I can forgive you. If you promise there's more of that in my future." she said playfully. She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, walking back towards the door and back out into the bar. Matt followed her back to the table, and Olivia sat down next to Casey.

Casey turned and looked at Olivia. "Everything OK?" she said with a little smirk on her face.

Olivia took a sip of her beer and smiled. "Couldn't be better." she said.

_**OK people. Please give me some reviews and let me know if you're still enjoying the story. I am working on the next chapter but I love to hear from people!**_


	19. Chapter 19

_**Thanks for all of the reviews. I know people are getting frustrated that it's taking so long to get to E/O, but that's how the story needed to play out. We're SO CLOSE! Enjoy and review please!**_

Elliot got done with the conferences for Dick and Elizabeth, and followed Kathy out of the school.

"Kathy" he said. "Wait up."

Kathy turned around and looked at him. "What's up El?"

"Our conversation this morning. I've been thinking about what you said all day." He looked down at the ground and then back to her face. "I never meant for this to happen. I never meant to hurt you." He reached out and placed his hand on her upper arm. "I meant what I said. You will always have a part of my heart."

Kathy sighed. "I know Elliot." She stared past Elliot's shoulder, not wanting to look him in the eye. "It's not anyone's fault. It just happened."

They stood there for a few minutes, neither of them knowing what to say.

"Are you going to tell her?" asked Kathy softly.

Elliot took a deep breath. "Yes."

Kathy nodded. "Elliot…I really hope things work out. I think that we both need to move on and get out of this limbo we're in."

"Yeah."

"I've gone on a couple of dates with a doctor from the hospital." She looked at Elliot, waiting for his reaction. She hoped her confession would make things easier for him. She knew he carried around a lot of guilt about the end of their marriage.

He looked surprised. "Really?"

She nodded. "El, we're going to be OK. It's OK. You need to tell Olivia how you feel."

Elliot shook his head. "It's just so strange. I can't believe we're talking about this."

Kathy smiled. "It's like we said before, we will always love each other El. And we have a family together. I hope we can always be friends and always be there for each other."

Elliot stepped closer to Kathy and pulled her into a hug. "I hope you can find happiness Kathy. You deserve it."

She hugged him back. "You too." She gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you later El." She said as she walked away towards her car.

Elliot got in his car and drove back into the city.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Matt and the rest of the guys said they had to get warmed up, leaving Olivia and Casey at the table. Matt gave Olivia a kiss on the cheek as he stood up. "I don't like leaving the two of you sitting here by yourselves." He said. "You're going to have all kinds of guys hitting on you two."

"It's fine. Nothing we can't handle. Remember, I'm a cop." she said. "Besides, our friends should be here any minute."

Matt smiled and followed the guys back through the same door they had been through just a few minutes earlier.

"He sure does seem to be in love with you." said Casey.

"I think that's a little premature." said Olivia. "Love?"

"OK. Maybe it's just lust." said Casey, conceding her point.

Olivia looked up and saw Chester and Fin working their way through the crowd, having spotted them at the table.

"Hey" said Chester. "You ladies mind if we join you?" he smiled at Casey and sat down next to her. "You guys look fantastic."

Fin nodded, agreeing with Chester. "Wow! I'm feeling like the lucky one tonight. Get to sit here with two beautiful women and all of these jealous guys."

Olivia laughed. "You guys are laying it on a little thick, aren't you?" She leaned over towards Fin. "Is Cherie coming?"

"Nah. She got stuck at work. I'm going to meet up with her later." he said. The waitress came over and got their drink orders, and as she left, the band came out on the stage.

"So which one of these guys is your man?" asked Fin.

"My man? Really?" Olivia raised an eyebrow.

Casey leaned in. "He's the lead singer." she said.

The band had started to play. They played a kind of alternative rock and the crowd was getting into it as they started to play. Olivia, Casey, Fin and Chester were listening and talking and having a good time and time was flying by. Olivia looked at her phone and saw it was already 9:30. She started to feel a little nervous, knowing that the band was going to be finishing up soon. She sat back and looked up at Matt. Her mind was racing and her thoughts were all over the place. She had been committed to moving forward; to giving this thing with Matt a chance. But now she wasn't sure if she was doing the right thing. She wasn't sure if she could give him her whole self…

She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, and pulled it out. She wasn't surprised to see it was a message from Elliot. She thumbed the message open and read it.

"Liv. Stopped by. Wanted to see u. Can't wait for movie nite. "

Olivia smiled and read the message a couple of times. She was looking forward to seeing Elliot tomorrow night too. She loved movie nights with him. It was an opportunity to just be with him without the stress of the job. They would relax, sit closer than they should and just enjoy each other's company. She loved his smell; she loved his presence in her apartment. Most of the time, they would fall asleep on the couch and wake up to find themselves snuggled together, awkwardly pulling apart and apologizing to each other for how they had unconsciously been drawn to each other in sleep. Suddenly, Olivia realized there is no place she'd rather be than in Elliot's arms.

Her head jerked up and she looked at Casey. She grabbed Casey's arm and Casey turned to look at her. Casey noticed the look on Olivia's face.

"What's wrong?" asked Casey, noticing the stunned look on Olivia's face.

"I have to get out of here." She said, looking around as if she didn't know where she was. She stood up, and turned around. Suddenly, Matt was there with the rest of the guys, and he grabbed her around the waist giving her a big hug. "So what did you think?" he said as he pulled back.

Olivia looked up at him, surprised to see him standing there. She hadn't even noticed that the band had stopped playing. Everyone was circling around the guys; congratulating them and telling them how much they had enjoyed hearing them play. Olivia stood still, not saying anything. Matt leaned over and whispered in Olivia's ear. "Is everything OK?"

She looked up at him. "I have to go."

The smile left his face. "What?" he said, furrowing his brow and looking confused. "Where? Did you get called in to work?"

"No. I just have to go…" she took a few steps away from the table.

Matt grabbed her arm lightly. "Olivia. Wait." He steered her towards the door next to the stage and pushed through it, pulling her through the door behind him. He stopped and turned back towards her, not letting go of her arm. He looked into Olivia's eyes. "What's going on?"

"I'm sorry." said Olivia, shaking her head. "I'm really sorry. I can't do this."

"I don't understand. What are you talking about?"

Olivia sighed. "Matt. I thought I could make this work. I wanted to try…"  
Matt stopped her. "I'm sorry. Did I come on too strong? Have I been pushing too hard? I didn't think I was pushing you but we can take it slowly."  
Olivia started to tear up. "Stop. This isn't about you. This is my fault."

Matt put his hands on her shoulders and looked at her again. "Olivia, don't walk away. Whatever it is…"

Olivia pulled his hands off her shoulders and held them in hers. "Matt… I am in love with someone else. I tried to talk myself out of it. I told myself I could let myself fall in love with you, but I can't. And that's not fair to you." She dropped his hands and put her right hand on his cheek. "I'm sorry." she whispered. "I have to go."

She leaned over and kissed Matt gently on the cheek, and walked back out into the bar. She saw Casey, Chester and Fin still talking to the guys from the band. She walked up to Casey. "I'm sorry Casey. But I have to go."

"Where are you going? I thought we were going to stay for a while and that you were going to go home with Matt."

"I can't. Casey, I…" Olivia sighed. "I have to go." She walked away before Casey could say anything else.

Olivia rushed out the door, looking for a cab. Suddenly, she had an overwhelming need to see Elliot. She didn't know what she was going to say or what was going to happen, but she had to see him.

She spotted a cab coming her way, and flagged it down. She gave the cabbie Elliot's address, and sat back in the seat, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.

When the cab pulled up in front of Elliot's building, she paid the fare, but sat there for a minute. Suddenly, she was petrified. What the hell was she doing?

The cabdriver turned to her. "Are you going to get out?" he asked rudely.

"Yeah." Olivia said, opening the door. She stood on the sidewalk for a moment, realizing she had no idea what she was going to say. She had no plan. Just a burning need to see Elliot. Someone was coming out, so she grabbed the door before it closed and before she lost her nerve. She walked up the stairs and stood in front of his apartment door. She took a deep breath and knocked.

Elliot opened the door, surprised to see Olivia standing there. "Liv?"

_**Love to hear reviews. The next chapter is coming soon!**_


	20. Chapter 20

_**OK, here we go…for all those who have patiently waited…let's see what happens now…**_

Elliot couldn't believe Olivia was standing there when he opened the door. He had been thinking about her all evening, but she was the last person he expected to see at his door at 11:00 at night. She looked amazing, wearing tight jeans and some kind of lacy lingerie top, with a sexy black leather jacket to boot. He couldn't help but look her up and down.

"Are you going to let me in? Or stand there and stare at me all night?" Olivia said as his eyes met hers. She hoped he was too distracted by her outfit to hear the tremor in her voice.

"Sorry." He motioned for her to come in, feeling a little bit like a jerk for looking at her like that. But damn, she looked incredibly sexy. "You look great." He said as she walked past him into his apartment. As she passed, he got a whiff of her and the smell was intoxicating. He didn't know if it was lotion or body wash or perfume but the smell was uniquely Olivia and he took a deep breath.

He had been spending the better part of the evening trying to figure out the best way to try to talk to her tomorrow night…thinking about how he was going to tell her that he loved her without scaring her away. He couldn't come up with any kind of reasonable way to even broach the subject knowing she was anticipating one of their regular movie nights. And then, here she was, walking into his apartment. He almost panicked, his only thought being that he wasn't ready for her to be here. He didn't know what he was going to say…how he was going to…

She stopped just inside the door, ignoring his comment, and looked around. The TV was on with the volume turned low and an empty beer bottle sat on the coffee table. "Am I interrupting anything?" she said, interrupting his thoughts.

Elliot shut the door. "Yeah, it was an exciting night here." He said, gesturing around the apartment. "I had a huge party and everyone just cleared out." He joked. She took a few steps into the apartment and he followed behind her. "It looks to me like your night was more exciting than mine. Where are you coming from? "

Olivia walked into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator and grabbed a bottle of water. She opened it up and walked into the living room. She sat down in the chair, took a drink and set it down on the coffee table. Elliot followed her and sat down on the couch, wondering why she wasn't talking.

Olivia let out a sigh. "I went to listen to Matt's band down at a bar in the lower East Side."

Elliot leaned back on the couch. "Oh. " He paused. He had really hoped that she had been out with Casey or Alex…he didn't want to think of her with Matt. But if she had been out with Matt, what was she doing here now? He mind started racing, but he didn't want to push her for information. Especially if it was something he didn't want to hear.

"How was that?" he asked.

"It was fine. I mean, they're good. The crowd seemed to enjoy it." Olivia was staring at the water bottle, not looking at Elliot.

"But you didn't?" Elliot asked. Olivia didn't say anything, and Elliot started to get concerned. There was obviously something she wasn't telling him.

"Liv, are you OK? Did something happen?" He got up on his feet. "Did that bastard do something? Did he hurt you?"

Olivia looked up at Elliot. "No! It's nothing like that. Matt wouldn't hurt me. He's not like that. I went down there to watch the band…" She looked back down at her water bottle, unable to keep looking at Elliot. She kept quiet for a minute and when she spoke, her voice was a whisper. "I wanted to give him a chance…give our relationship a chance…but I…I can't. I wanted it to work so badly…but tonight I realized, it's not what I want. I want…."

She looked up at Elliot, and he could see tears threatening to spill over her lower lashes. It took him by surprise. He never saw Olivia cry. She never let him see that vulnerability in her. He wasn't sure if he should go over to comfort her…or let her have some space. He could see that she was working through what she wanted to say.

Before she could say anything else, there was a knock on his door. She looked up at him in surprise and he looked back at her. He couldn't imagine who that could be, especially at this time of night.

He walked over and opened up the door. Olivia looked over and saw Matt standing there. She stood up and took a few steps towards the door, a confused expression on her face.

"Matt? What are you doing here?" asked Olivia.

Matt strode into the apartment and over to Olivia. "I followed you. You left so quickly and I wanted to talk to you. I thought you would go home. I didn't expect you would come here…" he turned to look at Elliot.

"Matt…" said Olivia, touching his arm so he turned back towards her. "I don't have anything else to say to you. I told you how I felt. Please, just go." She had a pleading look on her face.

Matt looked at Olivia, about to push her to talk to him, when he suddenly realized what was going on.

He turned back to look at Elliot. "Wait a minute. You don't want to see me anymore because you're in love with **him**? With your partner?"

Olivia gasped…looking up at Elliot and then back to Matt. She couldn't believe he had just said that. By the look on Elliot's face, he was equally as surprised. And her reaction was all the confirmation he needed to know it was true.

Matt shook his head. "I can't believe this. How many times did I ask you if there was something going on? And you were adamant that there was nothing between you two. That you were just friends."

"There is nothing going on…" said Olivia. She couldn't believe she was trapped in this nightmare. She looked over at Elliot. He was standing there with his mouth slightly open, looking back and forth between the two of them.

Matt turned back to Olivia and grabbed her arm. "OK, if there is nothing going on with the two of you, then let's go talk about this. You didn't even give me a chance to talk to you. You just ran out." He pulled her towards the door.

"Take your hands off her." said Elliot, taking a step towards the two of them.

"This doesn't concern you," said Matt. "This is between me and Olivia." He took another step towards the door, pulling Olivia behind him.

Olivia was getting pissed. Who the hell did he think he was, manhandling her like this? She tried pulling her arm away. "Matt, what the hell? I'm not going anywhere with you."

Elliot was there in two steps, grabbing the arm that was holding on to Olivia, and pulling it away. "Take your hands off her." He said again. He twisted Matt's arm behind his back, pulling him back a few steps more. Matt took a swing at Elliot, and connected with his jaw. Elliot stumbled backwards, letting go of Matt.

"Stop it!" yelled Olivia, stepping in between the two of them. "What the hell are you doing?" She looked back and forth between the two. Suddenly, she didn't want to be there anymore. She didn't want to deal with this ridiculous situation. She was done with Matt and she couldn't face Elliot. This was not how she expected this night to go…

"I think you'd better leave" said Elliot, grabbing Matt by the arm and pushing him towards the door. Matt looked back at Olivia and started to say something, and then thought better of it. He shook his head and opened the door, storming out and slamming the door behind him.

Elliot turned to look at her but Olivia was already walking past him towards the door. She had gotten the door open when Elliot caught up with her, grabbed her arm and shut the door before she could leave. He spun her around, so her back was to the door.

"Liv. Hold on." He put his hands on her upper arms, holding her lightly in place.

Olivia shook her head and looked down at her feet, refusing to look Elliot in the eyes. "I need to go." She was embarrassed by everything that had happened here tonight and she couldn't bear to look at him.

Elliot took one hand and lifted her chin to look at him. "Liv." For the second time that night, he saw tears brimming on her lower lashes. He brought both hands to her cheeks, brushing the tears away gently with his thumbs. "Shhh. Don't cry. It's OK." He continued to caress her cheeks gently with his thumbs. He looked into her eyes…he saw pain, but also something more…and before he knew what he was doing, he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. She gasped slightly…she hadn't been expecting it. But she didn't pull away. He leaned in and kissed her again, this time with a little more urgency. And then she was kissing him back, wrapping her arms around his neck. Their kisses became deep, filled with longing. Elliot pulled Olivia's bottom lip between his, and her lips parted. He plunged his tongue into her mouth and she let out a small moan. She let her tongue tangle with his and pulled his head closer to hers, stroking the back of his neck with her hand. She could feel a jolt throughout her body and hoped that Elliot couldn't feel her trembling. She always imagined that any contact between the two of them would be electrifying, but the feeling running through her body right now was nothing she could have imagined. Olivia pulled back slightly, needing to catch her breath. Elliot's face hovered over hers, and he pressed his forehead against hers as she leaned her head back against the door.

"Liv." Elliot said. "Oh my God..Liv." He had his hands on her waist. He reached up and stroked her left cheek with his right hand. Kissing her had been impulsive, but the moment he had, his body reacted immediately. He had to keep his body at a safe distance because if he touched any more of her, he was going to lose control. He always imagined that if they ever ignited the passion between them, their lovemaking would be intense, fierce, beyond passionate. And now he knew this was true, simply based on a kiss.

Olivia closed her eyes and swallowed hard. She bit her lip with her top teeth, trying to control the emotions running through her right now.

"Liv. Are you …OK? I mean…I didn't mean to…" he voice trailed off. The kiss had been spontaneous; not any of the millions of way he had dreamed of kissing her for the first time. He knew she had been upset, and hoped he hadn't taken advantage of her vulnerability. But she had kissed him back; there was no mistaking that.

He desperately wanted to pick her up, carry her into the bedroom, and make love to her. But this is not how he wanted this to happen. He wanted Olivia to understand how much he loved her. He wanted their first time together to be special; not a heat of the moment romp. He wanted to treat her with all the tenderness she deserved.

He looked down at her, realizing she hadn't replied.

"Liv?" he slid his hand back down to her waist. "Are you OK?"

Olivia sighed and closed her eyes, contemplating what she was going to say. She had wanted this for so long, but she was scared. She took a deep breath. "El…what Matt said before. It wasn't how I wanted to tell you but." She took another deep breath, opened her eyes and looked directly into his. "It's true. I love you."


	21. Chapter 21

_Thank you to all of you that have left reviews. It's really encouraging when I hear that people are enjoying the story. I am really enjoying it too; it's been fun to write. I like to hear all feedback, and don't mind constructive criticism, but there have been a couple of reviews from that are really rude. So to that reviewer…I am sorry that I haven't updated this story fast enough for you…but I am going as fast as I can. I want to get the story right…Your comments are rude and I don't enjoy being called names. In fact, your comments make me NOT want to post an update…so I think all of the other people that are anxiously waiting will not be unhappy with you._

_So for everyone else, here is the next chapter…please read and review. I am working on the next chapter right now!_

EO Forever. -

_Olivia sighed and closed her eyes, contemplating what she was going to say. She had wanted this for so long, but she was scared. She took a deep breath. "El…what Matt said before. It wasn't how I wanted to tell you but." She took another deep breath, opened her eyes and looked directly into his. "It's true. I love you."_

Elliot's hands slipped from her waist and he took a step back, continuing to look into her eyes. Olivia looked away, not able to deal with the intensity of his stare. She didn't know why he wasn't saying anything. What if he didn't feel the same way? Had she just made a total fool of herself? It seemed like minutes had passed, but really it had only been seconds. Elliot took both of her hands in his, and pulled her away from the door. A large smile spread across his face, and he pulled her into his body, wrapping his arms around her. He started to rock back and forth a little, holding her in his arms, and suddenly a huge laugh bubbled up and out. He felt all of the stress that had built up rush out of his body, and he couldn't stop laughing. He was holding Olivia tightly, and still rocking back and forth lightly. Olivia struggled to get out of his grasp. She couldn't believe he was laughing at her. Fucking bastard. She had bared her innermost feelings; something that was incredibly difficult and scary as hell for her. And he was laughing?

"Let go of me." She pushed against him. "You're an asshole."

Elliot loosened his arms slightly, but didn't let her go. He stopped laughing and looked back down at her.

"Liv. Stop." he said as she continued to struggle. "I'm sorry. Please. Stop."

He let her pull away from him a little, but only so he could get a better look at her. He held onto her with one hand while the other grasped her chin, forcing her to look at him. She stopped struggling, and looked up at him, wondering what on earth he could have to say to her after acting like such an ass. He was staring into her eyes, and it made Olivia feel uncomfortable. She tried to turn her head, but Elliot held onto her chin, forcing her to keep looking at him.

"Olivia Benson. I love you. I love you with all my heart, body and soul. I have never felt like this…_ever_. You have had my heart for years and I was too stupid to do anything about it…until I realized I might lose you. I have been taking you for granted. Assuming you would always be there, waiting for me to get my shit together. The thought of losing you scared me. So I have been sitting here all evening, trying to figure out how to tell the love of my life that I can't imagine life without her. That if she doesn't feel the same way, I don't know how I will manage to keep breathing…to keep going forward. Oh my God Olivia…You have just made me the happiest man alive." It all came out in a rush, and he stared into her eyes while he said it, trying to gauge her reaction.

Olivia's breath hitched and she looked down, trying to take in everything he had just said. She had wanted to hear those words for so long. She shook her head lightly, wondering if this was a dream. She was breathing heavily, and took a step back, letting go of Elliot's hand, his other hand dropping from its' hold on her chin. She hadn't really expected this; she realized she had expected his rejection. That based on her history, she realized she had expected he would tell her that she had misunderstood him…that his rejection would another in a long line of disappointments and she would be alone once again. But he hadn't rejected her. He had told her everything she wanted to hear. And right now, she thinks that maybe that scared her even more.

"Olivia?" Elliot asked questioningly. He was confused by her pulling away from him. She had told him she felt the same way he did, so why was she distancing herself from him?

"Liv?" he took a step towards her, but he didn't reach out for her. He could see that she was struggling with what he had told her.

His movement pulled her from her thoughts and she looked back up at him. She looked into his eyes, and she could see the concern in his eyes. But she could also see the love and hope there. She took a deep breath and closed the gap between them, grasping his hands with hers.

"El." She closed her eyes again, hesitated for a moment, and then opened them again. She smiled. "You have no idea how long I have dreamed of hearing you say those words to me. I almost can't believe it. I have loved you for so long, that I don't remember when I didn't. But I never thought you felt the same way."

"Well then it seems like we have wasted a lot of time." said Elliot, smirking and pulling her body closer to his. "And I am not going to waste one more minute." He leaned in and kissed her and she immediately melted into his body, enjoying the feel of his lips against hers and the warmth and comfort of his body as it molded it to hers. Elliot pulled his lips from hers, and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her even closer. She buried her face in his neck, inhaling his scent.

"Liv. I don't really want to stop kissing you…_ever_...but I don't really want to keep standing here by the door." Elliot said, laughing. He pulled back and took her hand, leading her into the living room. When they reached the living room, he stopped and turned to look at her. All of a sudden, he was nervous as hell. He hadn't thought much past telling her that he loved her…but now they were in uncharted territory. They had their old relationship carefully laid out. They knew what to avoid; what lines not to cross. But now they had obliterated that line. They had never been this honest with each other about anything, especially their feelings. And to top that, Elliot didn't have a lot of experience when it came to women. He had started dating Kathy when he was 16, got her pregnant at 17 and was married shortly after. He wasn't sure how this was supposed to go…maybe he should let her set the pace.

"El?" asked Olivia. "Is everything OK?"

Elliot looked back at her, realizing he had just been standing there after leading her into the living room, looking off into space. He wasn't sure what to say, but since they had started this new bout of honesty, he thought he would stay with it.

"Liv." He took her other hand in his, and pulled both hands up to his heart, clasping them there. "I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. I've only been in one relationship in my entire life. And while I loved Kathy, it was nothing compared to how I feel about you. I'm so scared of messing this up. I want you to know how much I love you. You deserve so much…and I want to give it to you."

"El. I've never felt like this either. I've had relationships, but as you told me once, you're the longest relationship I've ever had with a man. We are just going to have to figure this out as we go along. I think the best thing we can do is to promise each other that we will always be honest with each other. Do you think we can do that?"

Elliot nodded. Everything she said made sense. "Yeah. But I might mean we have to call BS on each other once in a while." He smiled.

Olivia smiled then, and Elliot thought that she had never looked more beautiful. Her big smile reached her eyes and he realized he could get lost on those eyes. He let go of her hands, and reached up to cup her face, pulling her face towards him. He pressed his lips down on hers and she wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him closer. She parted her lips slightly and Elliot slipped his tongue into her mouth, reveling in the taste of her. He slid a hand around, tangling his hand in her hair and cupping the back of her head, deepening the kiss. He could feel the impact of the kiss all the way down to his toes, and he could tell he was having the same effect on her as she let out a small moan. She pushed him back a few steps and the back of his knees connected with the couch, causing him to fall backwards and losing contact with her. He reached up to pull her down on him, but she stepped back just out of reach. She shrugged her shoulders, pushing the black leather jacket off her shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. Elliot took her in. His eyes wandered down to where the lace of her sexy, lingerie top rested against the swell of her breasts and he felt his dick twitch at the thought of touching her there. Olivia leaned over slightly, removing her boots, giving him a better view of her breasts and causing a sharp intake of breath from Elliot. She gave him a sultry look from under her eyelashes and a slight smile as she finished taking off her boots. Elliot smiled. She knew that what she was doing was driving him mad. It suddenly occurred to him that he didn't know this side of Olivia, but now that he was getting to see it firsthand, he realized she had a sultry, sexy side. This was the side of her he had always imagined in his dreams…and yes, there had been lots of dreams with the sexy Olivia Benson in them…but now that he was faced with the real thing, he knew he was in deep.


	22. Chapter 22

_Here's the next chapter…I hope you're still enjoying the story. This is still teetering on the edge of an M rating, so I think I have to change it starting with this chapter. Read and Review!_

Olivia stood up and looked at Elliot.

"Mind if I get comfortable?" she asked with a sexy smile.

Elliot shook his head, smiling back at her. "No. Make yourself at home."

Olivia took a step towards him, her legs touching his, and then hesitated for a second. She leaned down slowly, placing a kiss on his forehead, then moving down to his temple, trailing kisses down the side of his face until she reached his lips. As she kissed him, she moved forward, placing a knee on either side of Elliot's thighs, straddling him. As she deepened the kiss, she settled her weight on his lap, causing a groan from Elliot. He took his hands and slipped them under the hem of her shirt, placing his hands on her waist. He massaged her soft skin, sliding his hands to her back, and splaying his hands against her bare skin. He ran his hands up and down the bare skin of her back and Olivia arched her back, pushing her breasts into his chest. Olivia pulled back from the kiss, breathing heavily. She ran her hands down Elliot's chest. She had always been able to look, but never touch, so she was reveling in the feel of the planes of his chest. She reached down and grabbed the hem of his t-shirt, pulling it up and over his head, shocking him with the suddenness of her motions. He sat forward slightly, pulling the t-shirt from his arms and tossing it on the floor with her jacket.

"God El. You don't know how long I have wanted to touch you." Olivia said, continuing to run her hands over his chest and abdomen.

Elliot laughed. "Not nearly as long or as much as I've wanted to touch you."

Olivia leaned down and whispered in his ear. "Then do it."

Elliot had already been aroused, but her breath in his ear and her throaty voice as she told him to touch her made him instantly, painfully hard. She pulled back with a smile on her face, and he knew she could feel his hardness against her core. She pushed her hips down against him and he groaned. He put his hands on her hips, stilling her body.

"Liv. Stop that or this is going to be over before it gets started."

She licked her lips and gave him another sultry look. She took his hands and brought them back up to her waist. "Touch me Elliot."

Elliot let his hands slip underneath her shirt, and ran them up her sides, barely brushing the sides of her breasts. He brought both hands back down her sides, and then took his right hand and smoothed it over her stomach. Her skin was so soft and smooth. He took both hands and moved them up her stomach, and then brushed the underside of her breasts lightly with his fingers, feeling the lace of her bra. She took a sharp breath in, anticipating his next move. But he moved his hands back down, massaging the skin as he moved down. He wanted to feel and learn every inch of her beautiful body. He moved his hands back down to her waist, and then pushed up her sides again, taking her shirt along. He hesitated for a moment, then continued to pull her shirt up over her breasts, then over her head, dropping it behind her. She placed her hands back on his chest, exploring with her hands.

He groaned when he saw Olivia's breasts, clad in a creamy lace bra. He had imagined this so many times, but reality was so much better than anything he could have imagined. He reached up, tracing the line of her breasts where the lace met the skin. Olivia threw her head back, loving the feeling of Elliot's hands on her. She could feel the dampness pooling in her panties as Elliot's hardness pressed into her. Elliot ended his soft touches, and cupped her breasts in his hands, massaging them through the lace. She felt her nipples harden, and Elliot brushed his thumbs over them. Olivia involuntarily pressed her hips into him once more, causing another groan from Elliot.

"Liv." He moaned her name. He could feel her heat against him, and he didn't think he could stand it any longer. The pressure was maddening, so he reached up and pulled her hips up slightly. He didn't want to stop touching her and exploring her body, but he had to move her off his lap if he was going to be able to last much longer.

He looked at Liv, and she was staring down at him, mouth open and eyes hooded. He pushed her hips back slightly, moving her to the middle of his thighs. He took his hands and ran them up and down her arms.

"Liv. I don't want to assume anything, but…if we're going to…well, I don't want it to be here on the couch."

Olivia gave him an innocent look, enjoying how uncomfortable he seemed. "If we're going to…what?"

Elliot sighed. She wasn't going to make any of this easy for him. 'You know what I mean."

"Elliot. Are you trying to say you want to have sex with me?" She held her hands up to her chest, acting shocked.

"You're evil." Said Elliot, taking her hands and pulling her back to him and kissing her hard. "And no, I don't want to have sex with you." He started to stand up, pushing Olivia off his lap, forcing her onto the couch beside the spot he had been sitting on. He turned around, noting the surprised look on her face. He would show her that two could play at this game. He reached down, and pulled her up on her knees, still on the couch. He cupped her face with his hands and looked into her eyes.

"If you let me, I'm going to make love to you Olivia Benson. And you better believe me when I say there is a big difference. I am going to make you feel so amazingly wonderful, you're going to forget your own name." he leaned in and kissed her deeply. He pulled her off the couch and then scooped her up, seeing the surprised look on Olivia's face. She wrapped her arms around his neck and looked at him expectantly.

"Liv. If you're going to stop me…stop me now."

Olivia smiled. "I'm not stopping you" she whispered.

That was all the encouragement Elliot needed, moving around the couch and carrying her towards his bedroom. He was about halfway there when he stopped. Olivia looked at him, and raised an eyebrow.

"What's wrong?" Olivia asked.

"Um. This is kind of embarrassing, but I wasn't expecting..um..company. I think my room is kind of a mess. It's not really… I mean, all the times I dreamed about this, it was a lot more romantic. I want to make this special."

Olivia smiled at his confession. It was so sweet for him to be so thoughtful. None of the men she had ever slept with ever really thought about much besides the sex itself. But honestly, she had wanted this for so long, she probably would have had sex with Elliot in a car if he had asked her.

She traced her hand along his cheek. "Elliot, I appreciate that you want this to be special. But we have both waited so long for this…too long. Do you honestly think it matters to me? I just want you…and it's going to be special. It's going to be special because I love you."

Elliot carried her into the bedroom, kicking the door open as he walked through. He laid her gently down on the bed. He leaned over and reached for her belt, unbuckling it as he looked into her eyes. She didn't move, just watching him as he pulled the belt from her jeans. He smoothed his fingers across her stomach before sliding them underneath the waistband of her jeans. She held her breath as he reached for the button of her jeans, unbuttoning it and gently sliding her jeans over her hips. He slid them down, admiring her long legs as he did. After he had dropped her jeans on the floor, he stood up and looked at her. Olivia had propped herself up on her elbows and Elliot looked over the length of her body. He couldn't believe that Olivia Benson was in his bed. She was amazingly gorgeous, her body long and tan, her skin smooth, and incredibly sexy in her cream lace bra and lacy cream panties.

He took a deep breath and looked back at her face. He saw a sexy smile on her face, watching as he took in the sight of her.

"God Liv. You are fucking gorgeous. I always knew you were beautiful but even my imagination didn't do you justice."

Olivia blushed slightly. She had had her share of men tell her she was beautiful, but it meant to much more coming from Elliot.

"Well, Detective Stabler, you're not too bad yourself. Except that you are very overdressed for the occasion. Now, take off those jeans and get over here." She said demandingly. She laid her head back on the pillow and held out her arm.

All of a sudden, Elliot got an extreme case of nerves. He had been having sex with the same woman for thirty years. He had no idea how many men Olivia had slept with; what the competition was. What if he couldn't please her? She so obviously wanted him, but honestly, what did he know about pleasing a woman like Olivia? His love life with Kathy had been fine, but nothing spectacular. Pretty much the same every time; at least until the last few years when he sometimes guiltily imagined a certain detective underneath him instead of his wife. But looking at Olivia, he felt like this was a whole other league. His normally big ego was suffering a massive case of anxiety right now…

"Elliot?" Olivia interrupted his thoughts. She could see a look of worry cross his face. She was wondering if he was having second thoughts. She propped herself back up on her elbows. "What's wrong?"

He looked at her lying there. God, she was beautiful. And she was in his bed. Was he out of his fucking mind? What was his problem?

Olivia climbed up on her knees and moved over to the edge of the bed. "El. You're overthinking this. Come here."

He moved over closer to her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her upper body against his. She leaned over and whispered in his ear. "Are you nervous?" she said, as if she had read his mind.

"A little." he said softly, not believing that he was actually admitting that to her. I guess this honesty thing was catching on.

"I'm nervous too." She said softly.

"You're nervous?" Elliot said with a little bit of surprise in his voice. "But you've…"

He trailed off, realizing that was he was about to say would sound insulting. But Olivia caught it.  
"I what? She said, sounding slightly pissed of. "I've slept with lots of guys, so I shouldn't be nervous?"

"No, I didn't mean it like that." He said, as he watched the expression on her face. She was hurt. "I just…I've only slept with one woman before Olivia. And I don't want to disappoint you. I want this to be amazing…I mean, I know it will be amazing for me, but I want to make you feel things you've never felt before."

Olivia couldn't believe that Elliot Stabler was standing before her, admitting to her that he was nervous and scared. The man had an ego like she had never seen before; she had never seen him back away from anything. And the thought that she had made him feel this vulnerable was a little humbling, but was also kind of a power trip. She had always been a fairly dominant person in the bedroom, taking charge and telling her lovers what she wanted, preferring always to be on top, to be in charge. Part of it was self-defense, making sure she was never in a vulnerable position. But part of it was just her personality, and the fact that typically, there was not a lot of emotion involved in her sexual liaisons. But with Elliot, well she had just imagined that Elliot would take charge just like he did every other damn day. So this was very interesting…She wasn't angry or hurt any more.

"El. I've had sex with lots of men, but this is different. Just your kiss makes me tingle down to my toes, and when you touch me, El, I almost can't stand it. You make me feel like no one ever has before and we're not even to the good part yet." she said with a sultry smile. "Now, come here." She said, pulling him onto the bed.


	23. Chapter 23

_Thanks for all of your reviews. I appreciate the encouragement!_

_EOEOEOEOEO-_

Olivia pulled Elliot onto the bed and pushed him down on his back. She straddled him, with a knee on either side of his hips, careful not to come in contact with him. She ran her hands up and down his chest and abdomen, loving the feel of him. She leaned over slightly, running her hands up his chest, over his shoulders and down his arms. She leaned over again, and whispered in his ear "I love the feel of your body."

Her deep, dusky tone made him groan, and he felt himself harden again. If just the sound of her voice could drive him that crazy, what was it going to be like when he got his hands and mouth on her? He wanted her to kiss him, and lifted his head up to capture her lips. But she pulled back, using her arms against his shoulders to push him back down on the bed. He brought his arms up and grabbed her arms, trying to pull her back down to him. She resisted and he let go, not wanting to hurt her arms.

"You're not in charge Detective." said Olivia, smiling and slapping him lightly on the chest. She grabbed his arms and pinned them down, leaning over and placing a chaste kiss on his lips. She leaned back slightly and smiled at him.

"Liv, you're killing me."

"Patience." She said, leaning closer and placing kisses along his jaw. She trailed kisses down along his neck and collarbone, and down his chest. She lifted her right hand from his arm, and let it trail down, following the path of her kisses, her touch feather light. She felt him shudder beneath her, and smiled, looking up at him from under her eyelashes without stopping her trail of kisses. He was watching her, and she could tell he was holding his breath. She moved her body down his and she trailed down, maintaining steady pressure against his body. Her core brushed over his groin as she moved down his body and he groaned…and then as she continued moving down, her breasts rested on his hard member and he couldn't help but push up against her. She took her right hand and held him down and she placed kisses around his belly button, then tracing it with her tongue. Elliot was working hard on settling himself down or things were going to end very quickly.

Olivia sat up then, resting herself on his upper thighs. She looked up at Elliot and saw he was watching her intently. She reached down and started to unbuckle his belt slowly. She pulled it out from the belt loops and threw it on the floor. She unbuttoned his jeans and pulled his zipper down, looking back up at Elliot. She moved her right knee between his legs, and started to pull his jeans down, scooting down his leg as she did so. When she got to the end of the bed, she stood up and pulled his jeans the rest of the way off. Then she climbed back up on the bed, positioning herself between his legs and leaning down, running her fingers beneath the waistband of his black underwear. She moved her hands down, stroking his length through the fabric of his underwear. Elliot groaned loudly and rasped out her name. She reached for the waistband of his underwear again and started to pull them down, but Elliot couldn't stand it any longer. He sat up, grabbing her arms and pulling her back up.

"No." he said in a husky voice. Olivia looked at him with a questioning look. "If you touch me again I am going to lose it."

He flipped her over on her back. "My turn."

He pinned her arms up by her head, straddling her, but ensuring that his lower body didn't come into contact with hers. If it did, he was done. He leaned in, kissing her deeply, thrusting his tongue into her parted lips, pouring all of his desire into that kiss. After a few minutes, he released the kiss, and moved to her neck, sucking and nibbling and teasing her with his tongue. Olivia moved her head to the side, giving him full access and groaning with the intensity of the energy running through her body. Elliot moved down to her collarbone and kept going until he reached the top of her breasts. He traced this edge of the lace at the swell of her breasts, slipping his tongue just underneath the edge of the lace of her right breast. He let go of her arm, and used his right hand to cup her left breast. He massaged her breast, feeling the weight of it in his hand. He teased her hardened nipple with his tongue through the lace, and Olivia writhed beneath him. He let go of her other arm and moved his hand down to slide her bra strap over her shoulder.

He looked back up at Olivia, wanting some kind of assurance that it was OK to keep going. At this point, things hadn't gone too far…well, at least not past the point of no return…he wanted her to know that she could stop this at any time. When he looked up, she had her eyes closed.

"Liv." He said.

"Hmm." She said, never opening her eyes.

"Liv, look at me."

She opened her eyes and looked at him, desire and lust showing there.

"Are you OK? I mean…do you want me to stop?"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?" she rasped, lifting her head up slightly from the pillow. "God, El. If you stop now, I swear to God I will shoot you." She lay her head back down and closed her eyes.

Elliot smiled. He continued to slide the bra strap down her arm, starting to pull the lace back when he heard Olivia whisper. "The clasp is in the front." He stopped and smiled again.

"And you're telling me to have patience?" he reached up between her breasts, releasing the clasp. He pulled the lacy material back, exposing her breasts. He sat up slightly, taking in the sight of her.

"God Liv. So fucking beautiful."

Once again, he thought about all of the times he had imagined this…how many times had he sat across from her in the squad room, staring at her and imagining…especially when she wore that damn blue sweater that hugged her breasts…

He leaned back down, taking her breast in his mouth, sucking and teasing the nipple with his tongue. His massaged her other breast with his hand, giving it as much attention as he was the other with his tongue. Olivia was moaning and writhing beneath him, bucking her hips up into him, and making contact with his groin. All of a sudden, he felt her body stiffen and then she threw her head back and a powerful tremble coursed through her body. He paused, looking up at her, not believing he had just made her come.

Olivia rasped out. "Fuck El."

Elliot moved back up, capturing her lips in another kiss. Olivia wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down on her body. He wasn't expecting it and crashed down on her, pushing the breath out of her. He quickly slid to the side of her, never breaking the kiss. He let his right hand trail down her body, finally reaching the lace of her panties. He slid his thumb under the waistband and slid it back and forth, causing Olivia to break the kiss and hold her breath. She was still trembling slightly, trying to catch her breath and Elliot released her lips. He slid his hands down over her panties. He felt how wet her panties were, and groaned, knowing he had made her that way. Olivia pushed her hips up to meet his hand on her and he pushed down, eliciting a low moan from her. Elliot reached back up and slid his hand underneath her panties, moving his fingers down, using his middle finger to slide between her folds. When he did that, Olivia moaned loudly. He kept moving his hand down, feeling how incredibly wet she was. Without any hesitation, he slid a finger into her opening, causing her hips to rise up off the bed once again. He slid a second finger inside her quickly and started pumping his fingers slowly in and out. He ran his thumb over her clit, causing another loud moan from Olivia. Elliot smiled, wondering how loud he could make Olivia cry out; he had always imagined Olivia would be very vocal during sex. He rubbed her clit a couple more times and added a third finger, stretching her and pushing deeper.

Olivia started to meet his thrusts and Elliot looked up to see her face. She had her head thrown back, her hair was mussed and her cheeks were flushed. Her mouth was open and she was biting her lower lip, trying to contain herself.

"Let it go Liv." He brushed his thumb once, then twice across her clit again and Olivia reached out, grabbing the sheets with her fists. "Oh God El…" she moaned as she came hard, her walls clenching around his fingers. He continued to slide his fingers in and out and Olivia thought she wasn't going to be able to stand the waves of pleasure he was causing. She felt like every nerve was on fire and that it might actually be possible to pass out from the intensity of it all.

Elliot pulled his fingers out slowly, and watched her as she came back down, her body covered with a sheen of sweat and her breathing slowing gradually. He kissed her lightly on the cheek, and then moved down to her shoulder, peppering her with light kisses. After a few minutes, she opened her eyes and looked over at him.

He stopped kissing her shoulder and smiled at her. "Tell me your name." She smiled back at him with a wicked smile and said. "Olivia Benson."

"Hmm." He said. "Looks like I haven't done my job then."

His hand started to snake back down her body, but Olivia reached up and stopped it with her hand.

"I don't think so Stabler." she said. "This time, I want the real thing."

She rolled towards him and pushed him back. She got up on her knees and pulled down her panties, kicking them off when they reached her knees. She climbed on top of him, straddling him, and lining her center with his bulge, rubbing against him through his underwear.

Elliot could feel the heat of her through his underwear, and the wetness started to seep through as she continued to rub herself up and down his length.

Now it was his turn to go crazy. "Liv. I swear to God. I can't take much more…"

Olivia put one knee between his legs, and pulled his underwear down slowly, releasing his hard on.

Olivia smiled, and looked up at Elliot. She caught his eye. "Jeez El. You've been holding out on me." She pulled his underwear down and he helped her get them off his legs. She reached down and grasped the base of his shaft with her hand and slowly slid her hand up, teasing the tip with her thumb. Elliot groaned.

"Liv.. Fuck…Liv." That was all the encouragement she needed. She climbed back on top of him, and straddled him, positioned herself above him. She lowered her body until the tip of him was inside her, and then raised herself back up. Elliot groaned again and put his hands on her hips, trying to push her down.

"Stop being such a tease Liv. I'm going out of my mind."

Without another word, Olivia pushed her hips down hard, taking Elliot inside in one movement. The action caused both of them to yell out, as the feeling was beyond comprehension. Elliot stretched and filled her completely; a mixture of pleasure and pain as she adjusted to him. He could feel her tightness around him and he thought he might cum if she moved at all. He waited a moment, allowing her to control their movements. After a little while, she started to move, bringing her body up, almost to the point of pushing him out, and then suddenly slamming back down again. He yelled out again and Olivia threw her head back and groaned. After the orgasms she just had, her body was tender and sensitive, and it wasn't going to take much for her to go over the edge again. She started to move up and down slowly; Elliot put his hands on her hips and helped guide her motion.

"God Liv. You feel fucking fantastic. I'm not going to be able…" his words were cut off by a loud yell from Olivia as her walls clenched around him. She arched her back, moving quickly with his hands still guiding her. He reached for her clit, running his fingers across it and causing her body to spasm even more. She clutched his hand, unable to take more… Elliot tried to hold on but he couldn't, feeling the orgasm building in his body. He was powerless to stop it as her walls continued to clench around him, and he came hard, spilling himself into her as he groaned her name.

Olivia collapsed on top of him, completely drained and feeling weak with pleasure. Elliot wrapped his arms around her, enjoying the feeling of being inside her and holding her close. He had never felt this intensity before…like she was the other half of him and they had finally connected the two halves together, making one complete soul.

He ran his hand up her back and through her hair, placing small kisses on her forehead.

"Olivia Benson. I love you more than you can ever imagine."


	24. Chapter 24

_**Thanks for all of your reviews. I am not quite sure where to end this story, as there is a whole future for El and Liv…but I will keep it going for at least a few more chapters. Hope you enjoy. Read and review!**_

Olivia lifted up her head and looked into Elliot's eyes, and then collapsed back on him, burying her head into his neck and placing a kiss there. She sighed. She had never been so happy; so content.

"God El. I love you. I can't even believe this is happening…"

Elliot chuckled. "Good thing I have this room wired with video…just in case you need a reminder."

"Very funny." said Olivia. She sighed again.

"Are you OK?" asked Elliot, rubbing his hands up and down her back.

"I'm not sure there's a word for how I'm feeling right now" said Olivia.

"Is that a good thing?" Elliot asked.

"Oh my God. Am I going to have to stroke you ego all night?" groaned Olivia. "I don't know what the hell you were nervous about…that was…well, like I said. I don't even know if there are words."

"Well, I've been thinking about making love to you for a long time. You may have been the subject of a few daydreams…and lots of pent-up frustration. But I have to say, the real thing was so much better than I ever could have imagined." Elliot said. He rolled over gently, moving them on their sides. But as he rolled, he slipped out of her, making her gasp.

"Sorry." He said, rolling them the rest of the way and pulling himself on top of her, careful not to put his full weight on her and resting on his elbows. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips. "Have you ever thought about us…like this..?"

A slow smile played over Olivia's face. "Maybe…"

"Maybe?" said Elliot. "Maybe, my ass…"

"Yeah, your ass was in the mix somewhere…" laughed Olivia. She slapped him on the ass. "Let me up."

"Where are you going?" Suddenly he was worried that she was going to leave. This hadn't been planned and had been pretty fucking intense and he didn't really know what was going through her head right now.

"I have to use the bathroom. Is that OK with you?" she said, raising her eyebrow at him.

"Oh. Sorry. Sure." He rolled over, and lay on his side. "I'm warning you that it might be a mess in there."

"It's fine. My apartment isn't exactly immaculate."

She sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed, smiling at the ache between her legs. Damn Elliot and his big ego and his big dick…he felt so good but she was definitely sore.

Elliot placed a hand on her lower back when he saw her hesitate. "What's wrong?"

She looked back at him. "Nothing's wrong. Just assessing…" Elliot looked at her with a puzzled look on his face, and she got up from the bed and walked over to the bathroom. Elliot lay back down on the bed and smiled as she shut the door behind her.

He sighed, thinking about everything that had happened that night. He _really_ hadn't planned for _this_ to happen tonight. Not that he was complaining, but he was worried about Olivia. She had been on a rollercoaster with the whole Matt thing this past week, and she had come here to tell him something…but he was pretty sure she hadn't come here planning on ending up in bed. He hoped she didn't get spooked.

She had been in the bathroom a few minutes, and Elliot didn't hear any noise coming through the door. What was she doing? He hoped she wasn't in there kicking herself for what had happened, or trying to figure out how to escape. He thought maybe he should put some clothes on and not push his luck. He got out of bed and walked over to the bathroom door. Knocking lightly he asked "Everything OK? Do you need anything?"

"I'm fine. Be out in a minute." She said. He didn't want to overanalyze her tone, but she sounded fine. She didn't sound upset or panicked, so he relaxed a little.

He went to his dresser and pulled out a pair of sweatpants, sliding them on and tying the drawstring. He hesitated a moment, and then pulled out another pair for her. Then he grabbed a t-shirt from another drawer and piled it on top of the sweatpants. He didn't want to presume she would stay, but he really hoped she would. And while he would love to snuggle up to a naked Olivia Benson…he didn't want to freak her out. He had no idea what to expect from her at this point. So he was going to tread lightly.

He went back to bed, lay on his back and put his hands underneath his head, looking at the ceiling. He took a deep breath, and closed his eyes, reliving recent events. God, she was absolutely amazing. He had never imagined anything like this. He didn't know if it was because he had waited so damn long or if it was because of the intense connection they had, but in reality, it was probably a mixture of both. But he knew beyond a doubt that there was no going back, and that making love to Olivia would always be that intense and amazing and…

The bathroom door opened and Olivia walked out. Elliot looked over at her, stunned once again by how amazing she looked. He flushed slightly, looking at her naked, and he looked away a little. He had spent so many years trying NOT to look, that it still felt wrong somehow. She didn't seem to have any inhibitions about walking around naked though and he snuck a peek back at her.

Olivia laughed. "You're such a good Catholic boy. Are you embarrassed? For God's sake, you have had your hands and your mouth on every inch of my body. I think it's OK if you look at me." She continued to walk towards the bed.

Elliot looked back at her, taking her all in, and felt himself drowning. "Liv, you are the most gorgeous creature I have ever seen. I've just had years of trying NOT to look at you and let my imagination run wild…it's just habit. And part of me can't believe you're here."

She smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed. She had been sitting in the bathroom trying to figure out where to go from here. She had no idea what Elliot was thinking right now, but she knew she was scared shitless. She assumed he felt the same way.

"Liv." He started, feeling awkward that she was just sitting there at the edge of the bed. "He grabbed her hands and pulled her towards him. "Come here."

She hesitated a moment and then moved over, snuggling up next to him. She laid her head on his shoulder and threw her leg over his.

Elliot wasn't quite sure what to say, but once again, the whole honesty thing had been working well so far.

"I know neither one of us planned on this happening tonight, but I couldn't be happier. I know we have to talk about this and about what's going to happen next, but will you just stay here with me tonight? Please? I'm not expecting anything. I just want to hold you. It feels so good to have you in my arms."

Olivia couldn't believe that this was Elliot talking. Big, arrogant, cocky Elliot Stabler was practically begging her and she loved it. She couldn't help but jerk him around a little. A little payback for all the years of shit he gave her.

"I don't know El. I mean, I have to work in the morning…" she started to pull away, felt him tense up and saw the hurt look on his face. Suddenly, she felt really bad.

"El. I was joking. I'm sorry. I want to stay." She leaned over and kissed him. Elliot sighed in relief and smiled.

"Just remember Detective, payback is a bitch." He said to her, pulling her back down and kissing her. She lay her head back down on his shoulder. "Do you want some clothes? I pulled out an extra pair of sweats and a t-shirt for you."

She looked at him in disbelief and grinned. "All these years, you've been thinking about me naked and now you want me to put clothes on? Elliot smiled. Olivia leaned over, loosening the drawstring on his sweatpants. "I was thinking that you have too many clothes on."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

The next morning, Olivia woke to the sound of her phone alarm. But she was disoriented and still half asleep. It sounded very distant and she wondered if she was dreaming. She woke a little more, and felt something weighing her down. It took another 30 seconds for the events of the previous night to all come rushing back to her. She opened her eyes, and looked down. She was naked and had Elliot's arm wrapped tightly around her. He was flush up against her back with his legs tangled in hers, and a raging hard-on pressed into her ass. He was snoring lightly, oblivious to the alarm. She couldn't move without waking him up. She grabbed his arm and started shaking it gently.

"El. Wake up."

He didn't stir, so she shook him a little harder and pushed her ass back into him. He jolted awake, falling away from her a little.

"What?" he said in a confused tone. He opened his eyes and looked around, then looked over to see Olivia looking at him

"It's time to wake up." Olivia said, starting to sit up.

"What?" Elliot propped himself up on his elbow and rubbed his face with his other hand. "What time is it?"

"5:30" Olivia said, swinging her legs over the side of the bed.

"You're joking right?" he reached out and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her back into bed. "Come here. We're not getting up yet."

Olivia pulled back. "El, I have to find my phone and turn off that annoying alarm. And I have to get home and shower and change before we go to work. Even getting up now, we're going to be late."

"Screw it. Let's call in sick. We both have a million vacation days." He pulled her close again. "Let's spend the day in bed."

"You don't think anyone's going to think that looks suspicious? We're DETECTIVES, remember? I went out with Fin and Casey and Chester last night, and then left by myself. Casey knew I was headed here. And now I don't show up for work and you don't show up for work…? No. That can't happen."

Elliot sighed because he knew she was right but he _really _wanted to spend the day in bed with her.

"How about you call in sick and I will say I have something with the kids and need a vacation day?" he suggested, knowing she wasn't going to go for it.

"El…what I need you to do is get out of bed, make me some coffee, and drive me to my apartment." She got out of bed, moving to the living room to try to find her phone. She found her phone in the pocket of her leather jacket, crumpled on the floor. She turned off the alarm, and saw she had several text messages from Fin and Casey, asking where she was and if she was OK. She had a few missed calls from both too. The most recent was from Fin, just an hour ago. "Shit." She thought. She had no idea what she was going to tell them. Olivia always had her phone with her so they would be worried that she hadn't answered. Especially since she had left the bar by herself.

Elliot walked into the living room, moving to the kitchen. He had thrown his sweats back on, and looked at Olivia standing in the living room. She had a pissed off look on her face. "What's wrong?' he said as he reached for the coffee.

She sighed heavily. "I have a bunch of missed texts and calls from Fin and Casey. They were worried about me and I have no idea what I am going to tell them."

Elliot grabbed his phone off the counter, and saw that he had several missed texts and calls too. "Looks like they were trying to reach me too. Probably wondering if I knew where you were."

Olivia grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped herself in it. She sat down on the couch, pulling her legs up underneath the blanket and sighing.

"Well, we had better come up with something. We need to talk about this…" she gestured towards him and then back at herself. "and decide what _**this**_ is…"

Elliot walked over to her and sat down next to her on the couch. "I know. I kind of wanted to keep this between us while we figured this all out. But I just want you to know that to me, there's not much to figure out. I can't go back to the way things were. I don't want to. And I hope you feel the same way."

Olivia looked over at Elliot. She took in a deep breath, and let it out slowly. She closed her eyes, and Elliot felt his heart skip a beat. He said a silent prayer that she wasn't going to tell him something he didn't want to hear.

"El. I risked everything last night by coming here and telling you how I felt…and as scary as it was, I am so glad I told you. I don't want to go back either. I just…I want to go slowly and keep this between us for a while. It's a lot to…adjust to. Yesterday we were partners and best friends and now…God, I don't know what we are now."

Elliot reached over and pulled her close. "Liv. We don't have to define it. I love you." He hugged her tightly. " I don't know what I did in a previous life to deserve you because I know I haven't done anything in this life. I am the luckiest son of a bitch alive."


	25. Chapter 25

_**Thanks for all of your reviews. Hope you enjoy this next chapter. Read and review!**_

_Elliot reached over and pulled her close. "Liv. We don't have to define it. I love you." He hugged her tightly. "I don't know what I did in a previous life to deserve you because I know I haven't done anything in this life. I am the luckiest son of a bitch alive." _

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia stretched up and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Yes, you are." She said, laughing lightly.

Elliot shook his head and started to say something when Olivia's phone rang again. She was still holding it in her hand, so she looked at the screen. She groaned when she saw it was Fin. She knew she had to answer it. She hit the answer button on the phone and moved it to her ear.

"Benson."

"Liv? What the hell? Are you OK? Where the hell have you been?" Fin shot questions at her, not giving her time to answer.

"I'm fine. I'm sorry. I didn't want to talk to anyone so I turned my phone off."

"That's bullshit. I went to your apartment. I pounded on your door forever. You weren't there. Where the hell did you go?" Elliot could hear Fin's voice coming through the phone as he yelled at Olivia. He couldn't quite make out the words, but he could tell that Fin was _pissed_.

Olivia sighed. "Fin. I went to a hotel. I just wanted to be alone and I didn't want anyone tracking me down." She felt bad lying to her friend, but she didn't want to tell anyone that she had gone to Elliot's. It wouldn't take much for people to put two and two together, especially since there were a fair amount of people that already thought they were sleeping together. Plus, Fin wasn't a big fan of Elliot's in the first place.

"Bullshit Liv. I'm not buying it. And you never turn your phone off." His voice was a little calmer now. "Just tell me that you're really OK."

"I'm really OK. And I am REALLY sorry that I worried you. I wasn't thinking." She said.

"Don't ever pull that shit again." Said Fin. "I worry about you baby girl."

Olivia smiled. "I promise. See you at the house, OK?"

"K." Fin hung up.

Elliot looked at Olivia. "Sounds like that went well." He said with a smirk on his face.

"Yeah." said Olivia with a heavy sigh. "He's not buying what I told him, but he's not going to push it any further. I wish I could have thought of something better."

She was still holding her phone in her hand, and knew she had to get a hold of Casey too. She opened up her text messaging, and pulled up Casey's last text. She texted her a quick message.

"Sorry I didn't pick up. I'm fine. C u later." She hit send, knowing Casey would track her down today and try to pry information out of her.

As she shut her phone, she saw that it was already almost 6.

"Shit El. We have to get going." She started to move off the couch, but Elliot pulled her back. He pulled her onto his lap and peeled the blanket back slowly from her shoulders, placing small kisses along her collarbone. He let the blanket drop and brought a hand up to massage her breast. His lips captured hers and Olivia parted her lips, allowing Elliot to deepen the kiss. Elliot's hand started to slide slowly down her stomach, but Olivia reached up and stopped his hand before he could go any farther. She broke the kiss.

"El."

"C'mon Liv. Can't we just be a little late?" he said, looking at her with a pleading look on his face.

"Oh no. Don't make me the bad guy here. You don't think I want to stay? You don't think I would love to spend the day in bed with you?" she pushed herself down on his lap, pushing on his erection and eliciting a moan from Elliot.

'That's not helping Liv." he said.

Olivia got a sultry look on her face. She leaned in and whispered in his ear. "Tell you what. You get up now, get me coffee and get me home…be a good boy today at work, and I promise I will make it up to you tonight." She licked his earlobe and left a trail of kisses down his neck, and then pulled herself up and off his lap.

Elliot smiled. He loved this sexy side of Olivia and he was anxious to see what she had in mind later tonight. Hopefully it was something he hadn't even begun to imagine…

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia walked into the station house around 730. She carried a cup of coffee for her and one for Elliot. She saw that Elliot was sitting at his desk, and he looked up as she set the coffee on his desk.

"Morning El." She said, walking back to her desk.

Elliot leaned back in his chair. "Morning Liv. Thanks for the coffee."

"No problem." Said Liv, as she sat down at her desk and got settled. She looked over at Munch and Fin. "Good morning guys."

"Good morning Olivia." said Munch, not looking up from the file he was reading. Fin just nodded his head at her. So she guessed he was still a little pissed off. She knew he would get over it, and that he wouldn't push her for more information. His anger had just peaked because he was worried about her, and now that he knew she was OK, he would let it go.

Olivia got her computer powered up and started to check her email when Casey walked into the squad room. She said hi to everyone and then walked right up to Olivia.

"Liv. I need to talk to you about the Nelson case. Can we go upstairs and talk?" She was referring to the open conference area that was at the top of the stairs. Olivia really did not want to talk to Casey…she hadn't had time to put a story together.

"I'm kind of busy Casey. Can we do it later?" asked Olivia, daring to glance quickly over at Elliot. He was pretending that he wasn't paying attention, but she knew he was.

Casey grabbed Olivia's arm. "No. It really can't wait." Olivia was surprised, but allowed Casey to pull her up from her chair and lead her upstairs. Once they reached the table and sat down, Olivia looked at Casey and could tell she was upset. Olivia sighed. It seems like she had made everyone mad.

"Spill it. And it better be good because I was really worried about you. Fin went to your apartment and you weren't there, and I didn't dare tell him that I thought you were at Elliot's. But I wasn't sure and then when I couldn't reach you…I thought maybe you were 'indisposed' but damnit, I was worried about you. So tell me all the details and I _might_ forgive you." Casey said all of this in a rush, reminding Olivia of her previous conversation with Fin.

"Casey. I'm sorry I didn't answer my phone. I was at Elliot's but it's not what you think." Olivia felt bad for lying yet again. "Oh what tangled webs we weave" she thought to herself, as she realized she was telling Casey a different story than Fin. Which was probably fine because she was pretty sure they wouldn't compare notes.

Casey stared at Olivia, trying to gauge if she was telling the truth. Olivia held her stare for a few seconds, and then looked away, staring at the table. Casey decided to try a different tactic.

"So Matt tore out of the bar after you. Did he catch up with you?" she asked.

"Yeah. He caught up with me. He was angry when he found me at Elliot's." Olivia's mind went back to how Matt had blurted out her secret to Elliot. She had been angry at the time, but in hindsight, it was probably OK. She didn't know if she would have had the guts to tell him herself. "He accused me of lying to him when I told him that Elliot and I weren't involved."

"Well, you kind of did." Said Casey.

Olivia looked up at Casey, startled. "Casey, Elliot and I are not involved. We've had this conversation. I really did want to try to make things work with Matt. But I really don't think he wanted the grown up Olivia. All's we talked about was the past. He couldn't handle the fact that I was a cop; he always made light of it. But it's a big part of who I am. He wouldn't have been happy with me. And it wasn't fair to him to keep things going when.." she stopped, realizing she had almost told Casey that she was in love with someone else. She mentally berated herself for not watching her words.

But Casey picked up on it. "When what?" she asked.

"Nothing. It just wasn't going to work. And on top of that, he got physical with me when I told him to leave. Then Elliot dragged him off me and it just got ugly from there." Olivia dragged her hand through her hair, remembering the events of the previous night. Then her mind strayed to the other events and she felt a small smile play across her face before she could stop it.

"Liv. I'm sorry about Matt. He seemed like a nice guy. I can't believe he did that." Casey caught the smile on Olivia's face. "But I think there's more to the story. Now spill it because you owe me for making me worried sick last night."

Olivia shook her head. "There's nothing to tell." She looked back down at the table. She didn't know how long she was going to be able to keep it all in, especially if Casey kept pressuring her. She was actually itching to tell Casey…if for no other reason than to make it real. She still had a hard time believing last night had really happened.

"Most of the time, you're a good liar." said Casey. "But I'm not buying it. For one thing, you stormed out of that bar like you were on a mission. I know you were at Elliot's. And even if you were there and everything was purely plutonic, you would have had your phone on you. The Olivia I know is surgically attached to her phone. So for some reason, you weren't near your phone….all night."

Olivia didn't say anything.

"OK. If you slept with Elliot…say nothing." said Casey with a chuckle. As the words came out, Elliot trudged up the stairs, interrupting them.

"Everything OK up here?" Olivia breathed a sigh of relief. She had to get out of this conversation with Casey because she was two seconds away from telling her everything that happened.

"Yes." Said Olivia, standing up quickly.

"We got a call." said Elliot. "We have to go."

"Ok" said Olivia. She looked at Casey. "Duty calls."

"We're not done talking" said Casey. "I will catch up with you later." She watched as Olivia walked past Elliot. Elliot put his hand on the small of her back and followed her down the stairs. "Nothing happened my ass" said Casey to herself, smiling.


	26. Chapter 26

_**Sorry for making you wait for the next chapter. I was on vacation for a week in London and Dublin and didn't have time to write. I hope you're still enjoying the story. Please read and review. Thanks!**_

"What was that about?" asked Elliot as they moved down the stairs.

"Nothing. She was just pumping me for information." Olivia said. "But I didn't say anything." She said quickly when she saw the concerned look on Elliot's face. He knew that she often confided in Casey.

"Hm. OK." Elliot said as they reached their desks.

"Where are we headed?" asked Olivia, grabbing her jacket from the back of her chair.

"Domestic over in Alphabet City." said Elliot. "This is the third call there in a month, so unis thought maybe we should talk to the wife."

They walked outside and got into the sedan, heading for the address they had been given. They arrived about twenty minutes later, finding the wife and husband separated in two rooms in the house. The officer in charge filled them in, telling them about the last two calls and the wife's refusal to press charges against her husband. Olivia and Elliot talked, and decided that they would talk to the wife first. When they walked into the family room, they saw the wife seated on the couch, clearly in the late stages of pregnancy. She had a large bruise forming on her right cheek and her lip was split. The EMT's were tending to her lip and telling her she should go to the hospital to have the baby checked out. She was refusing their help, telling them she was fine.

Olivia knelt down next to her. "Lucy. My name is Olivia."

Lucy looked over at her.

"Can you tell me what happened?"

Lucy looked at her with a vacant stare. "Nothing."

Olivia continued to talk to her in a soothing tone, and Elliot stepped back a little and just watched her. Her ability to connect with the victims, no matter what had happened to them, always made him admire her so much. He was all muscles and brawn, intimidating perps and taking down the bad guys. But Olivia, she could be a badass when she needed to be, and advocate for the victims in the next heartbeat. He could never do what she did.

In the next minute, Olivia was standing up and turning to him, and he realized he must have been standing there daydreaming longer than he knew because she was telling him that she had convinced Lucy to go to the hospital and to press charges. Now they could arrest the husband and take him down to the precinct for questioning.

They walked into the kitchen and found the husband seated at the kitchen table, his head in his hands. Elliot wasn't sure if that was remorse for what he'd done or just for getting busted.

"Mr. Turner." said Olivia. The man at the table turned to look and saw Olivia standing near him. "Your wife is going to the hospital…" she started to say.

"What? What did you say to her?" he yelled.

"You're under arrest for assault" said Olivia as she started to walk towards him with her handcuffs. Before she knew it, he had jumped up from his chair and taken a swing, connecting with her left cheek. "You bitch!" he yelled as his fist connected hard, sending her falling backwards and down on her butt on the kitchen floor. The momentum made her fall back on the floor, but not hard enough to hit her head. The uniformed officers grabbed him, and pulled him back, pulling his arms behind his back and cuffing him. Elliot fell to the ground and put his arms around Olivia, pushing her back into a sitting position.

"Oh my God. Liv. Are you OK?" He pushed her hair back, looking her over.

Olivia pushed away from Elliot. "I'm fine. Just let me get up."

Elliot held her around her waist, pulling her up with him. Once she was standing, Olivia quickly moved away. The EMT's had come in the room, having heard the commotion.

"Are you OK?" they asked.

"I'm fine." Said Olivia, annoyed at everyone's reaction, especially Elliot's. He had treated her like damn damsel in distress, and had his hands all over her. That wouldn't have happened a week ago, and she was mad that he was acting so protective of her. Weren't they supposed to act like nothing had changed between them? He was going to get them busted.

She looked over at Elliot and he looked annoyed too. But he walked over and grabbed their suspect. "C'mon. We're headed down the to the station." He read the man his rights as they headed out of the house.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Later that afternoon, after Mr. Turner's statement had been taken and he was headed to Central Booking, Olivia and Elliot were both sitting at their desks. A colorful bruise had blossomed on Olivia's cheek, and her cheekbone hurt like hell. Elliot had been trying to engage her in conversation, but she was still annoyed. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. He stood up and walked over to her desk. He leaned against it and looked at her.

"How's your cheek? That bruise looks pretty nasty."

"It's fine El. I've been hit harder." She said, not looking up from her paperwork.

"Do you think I could talk to you a moment?" Elliot asked. "In private."

Olivia sighed. She knew Elliot wasn't going to drop it until she talked to him. "Fine."

She got up from her chair and walked towards the cribs, with Elliot trailing behind her. Fin and Munch had noticed the tension between them.

"Wonder what they're arguing about now?" Fin asked Munch. Munch just shrugged his shoulders. They were both used to the Elliot and Olivia show…lots of fights and yelling had happened over the course of the years.

Elliot followed Olivia into the cribs and shut the door behind them. Olivia had walked midway into the room, and turned around, hands on her hips.

"What did you want to talk about?" she asked.

"Are you kidding me right now? What the hell is your problem? Ever since we went to the Turners, you've been angry with me. And I have no idea what I did wrong!" Elliot said, trying not to raise his voice.

"Wasn't it just this morning that we agreed that we had to act like nothing had changed between us? And then we're at the scene, and I fall down and suddenly you have your arms wrapped around me and you're checking me over for injuries and lifting me off the floor. You don't think anyone noticed that?" Olivia spat at him.

Elliot shook his head. "That's what this is about? Jesus Liv. How many times has one of us been hurt and the other one of us is right there? How many shirts have been ruined by my blood? And how many of mine by yours? I didn't do anything I wouldn't have done any other damn day. We've always been there for each other. That's what partners do. You don't think I would have checked on Fin or Munch or anyone else that got punched and went down like that?" Elliot paced back and forth while he talked, angry at her for overreacting.

Olivia sighed and sat down on one of the bunks. She put her head in her hands and sighed again. Elliot was right. He really hadn't done anything he wouldn't have done on any other occasion. She looked up at him, and he had stopped pacing. He was standing in front of her, waiting for some kind of response.

"You're right. I overreacted. It's just that, in that moment, I felt like everyone was watching and knew our secret. I thought they could see the guilt all over our faces."

"Guilt?" said Elliot. "I don't think I would call it guilt." He smiled. "So, we're OK?"

Olivia nodded. "I'm sorry. It's just hard adjusting to…this… God. I don't even know what to call this."

"We knew today would be hard since we really haven't had a chance to talk this through, but we'll get there. We have the whole weekend ahead of us." Elliot sat down on the bunk next to her. "Now, if you really wanted to make it up to me…" he leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on her lips.

Olivia smiled. How quickly things change. Ten minutes ago, she had been so annoyed, and here she was making up with Elliot. She leaned over and kissed him back gently. Elliot took that as a good sign, and pulled her against him, deepening the kiss. As they continued to kiss, Elliot gently pushed her back onto the bunk and lay down next to her, pulling her body against his. He ran one hand through her hair as the other smoothed down her side, brushing the side of her breast, and then over her hip and finally resting on her ass. He pulled her body into his growing erection and groaned when her body made contact with his.

"Liv. I can't get enough of you. Just one kiss from you drives me wild." He whispered as his mouth left hers and trailed down her neck. Olivia enjoyed the feel of his lips on her neck, and felt her body start to tingle as he gently trailed kisses down her neck and collarbone. She closed her eyes, and moved her hands across his chest.

Elliot ran his hand back up to her breasts, and started to massage her breast through her shirt.

"Damn it Liv. Why do you have so many layers on? You're driving me insane." He reached down for the hem of her shirt and tried to work his hand underneath her shirt and her tank top. "This is impossible. I need both hands." He sat up and straddled her body, and Olivia opened her eyes to look at him. Elliot was starting to push her shirt up when she grabbed his hands.

"Shit El. We can't do this. Not here. What are we thinking?" She tried to sit up but couldn't with Elliot straddling her. "This is exactly what we were talking about a few minutes ago."

Elliot climbed off her. "You're right. I'm sorry. You're just so damn sexy that I can't help myself. I lose all control when I'm around you." He shifted uncomfortably, his hard on raging inside his pants.

Olivia sat up and climbed off the bed. She let her hand slide down and grasped Elliot's hardened member. He gasped as she slid her hand up and down his length. "Sorry we can't finish what we started, but hopefully we can finish this up tonight." She leaned in and gave him one more kiss, and then walked out of the cribs with Elliot watching her as she left. He was going to have to take a few more minutes to calm himself down before he could go down.

Olivia walked back to her desk, and saw Fin and Munch watching her. "Everything OK?" asked Fin.

"Yes" said Olivia. "Why?"

"Just asking. You guys were up there for a while, and I didn't hear any yelling." Fin said.

"Yeah, well, we worked it out." Olivia said, sitting down in her chair.

"Yeah. I can see that." said Fin. "You may want to go to the ladies' room and fix your hair and lipstick." He said with a smirk.


	27. Chapter 27

_**I hope you're still enjoying the story. I would like some reviews to see if I should keep going. I hadn't intended this story to be this long, but if people still like it, I will keep going.**_

_**EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO**_

_Olivia walked back to her desk, and saw Fin and Munch watching her. "Everything OK?" asked Fin._

"_Yes" said Olivia. "Why?"_

"_Just asking. You guys were up there for a while, and I didn't hear any yelling." Fin said._

"_Yeah, well, we worked it out." Olivia said, sitting down in her chair._

"_Yeah. I can see that." said Fin. "You may want to go to the ladies' room and fix your hair and lipstick." He said with a smirk._

_**EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO**_

Olivia's hand flew up to her hair, mortified by what Fin had said. "What are you talking about Fin?" she said, trying to sound cool and collected. "I was just lying down for a few minutes." Then she realized that what she said probably sounded even worse, so she looked way from Fin, stood up and went back up the stairs into the cribs. She burst in the door, surprising Elliot, and headed for the bathroom and the mirror. She took one look and slammed her hands down on the sink. "Damn it!"

"What's wrong? " asked Elliot, walking into the bathroom.

"We are never going to be able to keep this a secret. Everyone knows everything about everybody. Fin just called me out on my messed up hair and lipstick." Olivia groaned, trying to straighten her hair with her fingers. "I'm no good at sneaking around."

Elliot laughed. "You're joking, right? We're undercover all the time. It's what we _do_."

Olivia pushed past him, frustrated that he wasn't taking this seriously.

Elliot grabbed her arm. "Liv. Calm down."

Olivia turned to look at him. "Calm down?"

"Fin's just fishing. You know that there are always rumors about us. He doesn't have any clue about what's going on. There are lots of explanations for some messed up hair or smeared lipstick."

"Elliot. You really are delusional. The two of us are up here, alone. And then I come down with messed up hair and swollen lips and you really don't think he knows what's going on?"

"Liv. Listen to me. Those guys can guess all they want, but unless you tell them, they really don't know. We haven't been up here that long. So just play it cool like you do every other time someone makes some comment about the two of us." He lifted both hands to her shoulders and leaned over and kissed her gently on her forehead. "It's OK."

Olivia sighed and shook her head. "OK. I guess you're right. It just must be my conscious kicking in. I swear I feel guilty, and I'm not even Catholic! That's your department."

"Liv. There is nothing to feel guilty about. We've been over this. We're two consenting adults, and neither one of us is married."

"And it's against department regs…and you're ex-wife and kids are going to hate me…and"

"Liv. Stop! Please. You told me you wouldn't do this until we had a chance to talk all of this through. It doesn't matter. None of it matters. All that matters is that I love you. And you love me. The rest is noise and we'll work it out." He pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her. She slowly put her arms around him, allowing her body to relax into his.

"I'm no good at this Elliot. I've never been in a real relationship where I've cared so much…When things get tough, I usually bail."

"Not an option this time Benson. You're stuck with me." Elliot kissed the top of her head and Olivia smiled. "Now, let's try to get through the rest of this day because I think someone made some promises about tonight. And I intend to collect on those promises."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot walked downstairs, leaving Olivia upstairs to calm down for a few minutes. When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he looked over at Fin and Munch. They looked back at him, and notice the scowl on his face. They both looked away without saying a thing. Elliot sat down at his desk and started digging through the files piled on his desk.

Cragen walked out of his office and over towards Elliot. "What's going on with the Turner case?"

Elliot gave him a brief update on what had happened with the interview. At that moment, Olivia walked down the steps from the cribs and over to her desk.

"What happened to you?" asked Cragen, and Olivia immediately startled, wondering what the hell Fin had said. "That looks like a nasty bruise." Olivia let out the breath she didn't even know she was holding.

"Mr. Turner didn't think I should be meddling in his family business. It's fine. I almost forgot about it." Olivia said, sitting down in her chair.

"Did the EMT's check it out?" Cragen asked.

"It's fine Cap'n." Olivia hated being the subject of such scrutiny.

Cragen looked at his watch and saw that it was almost 6. "It's been a long week for everyone, and since it's relatively quiet right now, why doesn't everyone get out of here. Have a good weekend." He walked back towards his office.

Fin leaned back in his chair. "Who wants to go to O'Mally's for a drink? I'm buying."

Elliot and Olivia looked up at each other. It was hard to believe that this entire thing had started just last Friday at O'Mally's, with Matt making a surprise appearance.

"I think I'll pass." said Olivia. "I just want to get home and get some sleep. It's been an exhausting week."

"Yeah, me too." said Elliot. He looked over at Olivia, wondering if she really meant what she said or if she was just covering up for the fact that they were going to spend the evening together. He hoped she wasn't backing out of their supposed plans.

"I'll stop for a drink" said Munch, standing up. "Let's go before Cragen changes his mind."

Fin stood up and walked around the desks. He stopped by Olivia's desk. "Have a good weekend." He said, winking at her as he walked by. Munch followed him out, smiling at her as he passed by.

After they were out of the squad room, Olivia leaned back in her chair and groaned. "Yeah, they don't suspect a thing." She said. "Why do I listen to you?" Olivia said. Elliot looked up, expecting to see anger on her face. But instead he saw a small smile playing across her lips.

"So Stabler…." Olivia had a pen in her hand and tapped it against her lower lip. "Are you backing out of our plans tonight?"

Elliot watched her, seeing her lips parted and that damn pen tapping against her lip. Her mouth was so damn sexy and his mind drifted to all of the things she could be doing with that mouth.

"El!" Olivia said, trying to break him out of his reverie. "Did you hear what I said?"

"Umm. Yeah. I mean. No. I'm not backing out. Are you?" he asked, moving his gaze away from her mouth and looking into her eyes.

"Not a chance." She stood up and walked over to his desk, looking around the squad room to make sure no one was in hearing range. She leaned over and whispered into his ear, dropping her tone so it was a low husky purr. "I hope you're not too worn out and that you've saved some energy because you're going to need it. I have plans for you." Elliot felt his dick twitch and his heart beat faster. God, what this woman could do to him with just a whisper and some innuendo.

Olivia walked back around her desk, grabbed her jacket and looked back over at Elliot. "Are you coming?" Elliot took a deep breath. "Almost." he thought to himself, standing up and following her out of the squad.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

The climbed in Elliot's car and once they had pulled out of the parking lot, Olivia put her hand on Elliot's thigh. Elliot looked down at her hand, surprised to see it there. After all the years of NOT touching, it was so strange. Of course, after all that had happened between them, he knew he shouldn't be surprised by a hand on his thigh. It was just going to take some time to adjust.

Olivia ran her hand up and down his thing, increasing the pressure. Her hand was sliding a little more towards his inner thigh with each stroke, and her fingers brushed him, causing him to jerk slightly.

"Liv. What are you doing? I'm driving." He looked over at her and saw a wicked smile on her face. She seemed to be pretty pleased with herself.

"Am I bothering you?" she asked, pasting an innocent look on her face. "I was just trying to relax you. I know you've had a hard day." She kept stroking his thigh with her hand.

"Funny. " said Elliot. "Seriously, you're going to cause an accident if you don't stop that."

"You're a good driver. I think you'll be OK." She said, switching hands and rubbing her right hand against his hardening erection.

Elliot groaned. "Liv." He reached down and grabbed her hand, stopping her motion. "Stop it." He took her hand and brought it up to his mouth, giving it a kiss. "We're going to have a hard time explaining why I rear ended a cab."

Olivia laughed and Elliot looked over at her. She had a big smile on her face as she leaned back in the seat. Olivia was obviously in a playful mood and he couldn't wait to get to her apartment.

"El. Do you mind dropping me off at my place and coming back in an hour or so? I really want to take a nice hot bath and change clothes before we have dinner and movie night." She put air quotes around the words "movie night".

"Sure." Said Elliot, a little disappointed in the delayed start to their evening. But really, that would give him a chance to take a shower and shave and put on some more comfortable clothes. "Should I pick up dinner on the way back?" he asked as he pulled up in front of her apartment building.

"Yeah, that would be good." She unbuckled her seatbelt, and started to open the car door. As she was sliding out of the car, she turned to Elliot. "I was going to tell you to pack a bag for the weekend, but if this weekend goes as planned, you really won't need any extra clothes…" Olivia winked at him and smiled as she closed the door, noting the surprised look on Elliot's face.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot watched her walk to her apartment door, leaning back in his seat and letting out a deep breath. God, he couldn't believe this was actually happening. This was real. He was so incredibly happy, and he couldn't stop grinning from ear to ear as he drove to his apartment. When he got there, he jumped in the shower, shaved and threw on some jeans and a polo shirt. Despite what she said, he threw some clean clothes in a duffel bag, and went back out to the car. He stopped by a deli close to his apartment, and picked up some sandwiches and a salad. He looked at his watch, noting that it had been about an hour. He hopped back in his car and drove over to Olivia's. He let himself into her building with his key, and walked up the four flights to her apartment. He knocked on the door, but Olivia didn't answer. Figuring she might still be in the tub, he opened the door with his key and stuck his head in. He saw that Olivia had the lamps on low, and a few candles lit in the living room.

"Liv?" Elliot said. "Is it OK to come in?"

"Come in El." said Olivia, calling from her bedroom. Elliot walked in, shutting the door behind him. He went into the kitchen, and unpacked the food from the deli. He put it in the refrigerator so it would stay cold until they ate.

"Liv?" he called out.

"In here." Said Olivia and Elliot walked towards her bedroom door. When he came around the corner, he stopped in his tracks, groaning at what he saw. Olivia was clad only in a black lacy bra and barely there panties. She had her left elbow above her head, leaning against the doorframe with her left hand propped on her head. Her right knee was slightly bent, her hips cocked slightly to that side and her other arm lay loosely at her side. She had her head slightly bowed, and was looking up at him through her long, dark eyelashes. She had a sultry smile on her face that made Elliot weak in the knees. He looked her up and down, taking in her long smooth legs, her caramel colored skin, her hips, her breasts, her pouting mouth and a loud groan escaped his lips. If he lived to be 100, this image of her would be imprinted in his brain.

"I thought maybe we'd have dessert first." She said in that sexy tone she had, and Eliot was truly undone.


	28. Chapter 28

_**Read and review people! I love to hear from you; it keeps me going!**_

"_I thought maybe we'd have dessert first." She said in that sexy tone she had, and Eliot was truly undone._

_**EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO**_

"Have mercy." said Elliot, moving slowly towards Olivia while his eyes roved over her body. She didn't move. She just watched him, enjoying the look on his face. His eyes had turned darker with lust and she tensed slightly, expecting him to be on her, ravaging her with his hands and his mouth. Instead, when he reached her, he stopped without touching her. He reached out, and lifted her chin slightly with his hand, forcing her eyes to connect with his. Her arm dropped to her side as she looked at Elliot, surprised by his actions.

"Olivia. You are, without a doubt, the most beautiful woman in the world. I will never get tired of looking at you…" he placed a gentle kiss on her shoulder. "kissing you…" he placed a gentle kiss on her lips "touching you..." he trailed his fingers across the top of her breasts. " loving you…" he placed his hands on her waist, pulling her gently towards him. Olivia was shocked at his tenderness and a few tears sprung in her eyes. Elliot took his thumbs and wiped away the tears. "Liv. You deserve to be loved and adored. I love you so much."

Elliot wrapped his arms around her, inhaling her scent and running his hands up and down her back. He just loved the feeling of her in his arms. Olivia leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist and pulling him tightly to her. It was as perfect of a moment as she could remember. She had never felt so completed loved in her life.

Elliot pulled back and looked her in the eyes again. "Liv, when I was driving over here, I was so excited. I was like a school boy going on his very first date. I just feel so damn…lucky. Lucky that you walked into that squad room all of those years ago. Lucky that you didn't give up on me as a partner and as a friend. Lucky that you had the courage to say what was in your heart when I didn't." he chuckled lightly. "If I ever see Matt again, I am even going to have to thank him or we might not be standing here right now."

Olivia smiled and leaned back into Elliot. Being wrapped in his arms felt so wonderful. She buried her face in his chest, feeling how strong he was, but how gently he was holding her. "I love you." She whispered. "More than you could ever know." She sighed in complete satisfaction.

Elliot pulled back again. "Liv. When I saw you standing there, I practically had a heart attack. I have been thinking about this _all day_. And then I get here and you're…" he gestured up and down. "I wanted to pick you up and throw you on the bed and make you scream with pleasure. But Liv, I want you to know that it's not just about sex. I need you to know that. I mean, I have been thinking about having sex with you for the better part of the last 8 years…but you know that it's not just that? Right?"

Olivia smiled up at Elliot. He had such an earnest look on his face. "El. I know that. Of course I know that. But…"

"But what?" asked Elliot, a little nervous about what she was going to say. He hadn't meant for things to get so serious. Honestly, when he saw her standing there, his only thought was how badly he wanted to fuck her senseless. But he knew that lots of men had been in this position; had seen her as a sex object and nothing else. They didn't know the real Olivia Benson; there was no emotion. Just a sex act. He didn't want to be like other men. He wanted her to know just how much she meant to him. If she said something different now, he was going to die.

She smiled. "I love you Elliot. I feel safe and loved with you. I trust you. I know it's not all about sex. But we have waited a long time, and…the sex is pretty fucking amazing. And I'm practically naked…so now that we've agreed it's not just about sex, do you think you could go back to the part where you're going to make me scream with pleasure?" She let her hands drop, and grabbed his hand in hers, walking backwards into the bedroom and pulling Elliot along with her.

Elliot smiled. "You are going to be the death of me Olivia Benson. And I love it." He kicked the door shut behind him.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot scooped Olivia up in his arms and gently tossed her on the bed. She scooted back, resting on her elbows. Elliot took a few minutes to look at her again, and shook his head. He pulled his polo shirt over his head and Olivia smiled. She never got tired of the sight of Elliot's chest and arms. He unbuckled his belt and toed off his shoes. As he started to unbutton his jeans, Olivia sat up on the bed.

"Let me" she said as she crawled over to the side of the bed on her knees. She placed a few kisses on Elliot's chest as she slowly unbuttoned his jeans. She ran her hands all the way around the waistband of his jeans, slipping her fingers underneath the material. Her mouth never left his chest, kissing her way down his chest to his abdomen. She slowly unzipped his jeans and pulled his jeans down his thighs. When they reached his ankles, he kicked them off.

Olivia trailed her tongue downwards, causing Elliot to groan. He was already hard and straining against the fabric of his underwear. Olivia brought her hand up and cupped him, and then ran her hand up his length, eliciting another groan from Elliot. Olivia reached for the waistband of his underwear and slowly started to pull them down, following the path of the underwear with her tongue. When she hit the head of his dick, his hips jerked forward. He felt a jolt run through his entire body and he looked down as Olivia ran her tongue down his length. The sight of Olivia with his mouth on him made him even harder and his dick was throbbing. As she started back up, Elliot grabbed her head and stopped her.

"Stop." He rasped. Olivia looked up at him.

"No." she said and placed her mouth over the head of his penis. Elliot threw his head back and involuntarily thrust into her mouth. Olivia accommodated him, taking him deeper. He was too long to take in completely, but as she tried to take in more of him, he pulled back.

"Liv. You have to stop that." He pushed her back on to the bed, climbing over her. "I can't…" He blew out some air "It's too much. I want to wait until I'm inside you."

He pushed a knee in between her legs, and could feel the moisture gathered there. He smiled and looked down at her, happy that he had made her that wet.

"Stabler, you're all ego." She said, noticing the smug look on his face.

He leaned in and kissed her. "And you love it." He kissed her more deeply, pushing her lips apart with his tongue and deepening the kiss. Olivia brought her hands up and wrapped them around, pulling him closer. Their kisses were fueled with passion and Olivia felt as if Elliot was devouring her. She could feel her entire body tingling with desire. She wanted his hands, his mouth, his tongue, on every inch of her body. As if reading her mind, Elliot dropped down and started kissing her neck. He was sucking and biting lightly and kissing and Olivia knew she would have marks in the morning. He was branding her and making her his and at this moment, she never wanted anything more.

Elliot moved across her shoulder, moving her bra strap to the side. Then he moved his mouth down to her bra, sucking at her nipple through the lace. He could feel the hard nub, and pulled the strap down her arm, revealing her right breast to him. He licked around her nipple with his tongue while Olivia writhed beneath him. She pushed her core into his leg, and he pushed his knee up, increasing the pressure. He took her sensitive nipple in his mouth and sucked and teased it with his teeth.

Olivia sucked in a breath. "Shit."

Elliot reached up to her left breast and covered it with his hand, feeling its' weight and massaging it. He ran his hand over her nipple, while he continued sucking on her other breast. He reached up and lowered her other bra strap, revealing her left breast, and moved his mouth to that one, giving it the same attention as he had the other.

Olivia was moving underneath him, feeling her entire body tingling. She spread her legs wider, and Elliot's knee pressed harder, feeling how wet she had become.

"Please. El. Shit." She tried to reach down, trying to reach him, but he pulled her hands back.

"Patience." He said with a smile. He trailed kissed along her stomach and Olivia's body broke out in goosebumps. Elliot moved slightly to the side, and slid his hand along her panty line. He put his thumb underneath the waistband and ran it along her lower abdomen, sending shivers through Olivia.

Elliot got up and moved over Olivia, placing his knees between her legs and forcing her legs farther apart. He took his right hand and gently smoother it over her panties towards her opening, and was greeted with some swearing by Olivia.

"Liv. God, you are so wet." He took hold of her panties and gently eased them down her hips and thighs, taking in the sight of her. He slowly slid her panties down her legs, backing up as he went. When he had them off, he climbed back on the bed, and slowly kissed his way up her right leg, placing hot kisses on her inner thigh.

"Fuck El. Touch me." said Olivia. She couldn't take this much longer.

Elliot moved up and ran his tongue up her center, causing a jolt from Olivia as she bucked her hips off the bed.

"Fuck!" she yelled.

Elliot reached up with one hand and held her hip down, while his tongue found her clit. He ran his tongue over it once, then again and Olivia yelled out a string of obscenities while she came hard. Elliot kept up the pressure with his tongue, and Olivia fought against him, the pleasure pouring through her in waves. Elliot relented momentarily and let her come back down. He moved up slightly, placing kisses on her stomach while his hand found her. He slipped in one finger, causing another yell from Olivia as she hadn't been expecting it. He added a second finger, pushing and stretching, and then pumping in and out. His thumb found her still sensitive clit and within in a minute, he could feel her walls clenching around his fingers and moisture seeping over his hand. Olivia was biting her lower lip and clenching the sheets, the pleasure ripping through her body.

"El. Fuck. I want you. NOW!" she said, trying to twist away from his hand as he kept stroking her.

Elliot moved over her again, placing himself between her knees. He lifted her legs, placing her legs over his arms, opening her up. He looked up at her, her head was thrown back and her eyes were closed. Her hair was fanned out and her body was flush. She was breathing heavily, and he could tell she was anticipating…

Olivia felt him hesitate and she opened her eyes to look at him. He captured her eyes, and thrust into her, causing a cry from her. Elliot stopped and looked at her, worried that he had hurt her.

"It's OK. I'm OK." She said breathlessly.

Elliot pushed in deeper, trying to bury himself in her. "Fuck Liv. You feel so good. You are so fucking tight." Elliot pulled out and pushed back in, causing another gasp from Olivia. They found their rhythm, and they were both moaning with the intensity. As Elliot rocked into her, Olivia reached up and grabbed the back of his neck, pulling him closer for a deep kiss.

Elliot broke the kiss as he could feel his orgasm coming. "Shit Liv. C'mon. Come with me." He reached down and swiped her clit with his thumb, sending her over the edge, her walls clenching around him so hard it took his breath away. He felt himself coming and he thrust one more time hard into her, spilling himself inside. "Fuck Liv." Elliot could barely hold himself up; his arms were trembling. Olivia core clenched around him like a vise as she strung together another unintelligible string of curse words laced with his name.

Elliot slowed his motion as he let Olivia's legs fall. Elliot fell slightly to the side of her, pulling her along with him. He couldn't hold himself up any longer, but he didn't want to crush her. He kept his arms wrapped tightly around her, and kissed her deeply.

Olivia let out a big sigh, trying to slow her breathing. She opened her eyes and looked at Elliot.

"Detective Benson." said Elliot. "I never knew you were a sailor."

"What?" said Olivia, confused by his comment.

"Where did you learn to swear like that? I think there were some words sprinkled in there that I have never heard before."

Olivia laughed. "You bring out the devil in me I guess."

Elliot smiled. "Then I shouldn't have been so worried about going to hell. I never knew the devil was so fucking sexy."


	29. Chapter 29

_**Please read and review. I think this is getting pretty close to the end of this story…. I will maybe write a few more chapters and tie things up. I don't see writing a whole wedding scene etc., so perhaps it's just best to leave it on a happy note…moving towards the future, and start a new story, Half the fun is the anticipation of them getting together! Thoughts?**_

Olivia lay in Elliot's arms and sighed.

"Happy?" asked Elliot.

"Yeah." Olivia smiled, tilting her head to look up at Elliot. "and hungry. Did you bring food?"

That made Elliot laugh. "Yes, Detective, I brought food. But I just brought sandwiches and soup. I'm not sure that's going to cut it. I really worked up an appetite." He snuggled her closer.

"I agree. I'm starving." Olivia said.

"Well, I suppose we could go out." said Elliot.

"Hmm. Are you asking me out on a date?" asked Olivia.

"Yes, I suppose you could call it a date."

"I know you're new to this, but I just wanted to let you know that you're supposed to take a girl out on a date _before_ you sleep with her. So you have this kind of backwards."

"If buying a few meals is what gets you laid, then I have been missing out. With all of the coffee, donuts and lunches I've bought for you over the past 8 years…you owe me." He leaned in and kissed her, running his hand over her shoulder and down her arm. He dropped his hand down to her hip as he deepened the kiss, until Olivia broke it off.

"Not so fast Stabler. Feed me." Olivia said, rolling away from him. He tried to grab her and pull her back to him, but she eluded his grasp.

"El. Seriously, I'm starving. I know we could probably stay in bed all weekend and I would never get tired of this, but a girl does have to eat." She stood up and walked into the bathroom, giving Elliot a backwards glance and a smile as she shut the bathroom door.

Elliot smiled. He heard the shower start running and let his mind wander. He had been thinking about a relationship with Olivia for a long time, but really, it had never gotten much past wishful thinking. He never expected them to end up in bed together, much less seriously considering a relationship. But now it was a reality. They could really be together; be a couple. He couldn't stop smiling. Suddenly, he didn't want to keep it a secret any longer. He had been denying his feelings for so long, and now that they were out in the open, he wanted to let everyone know. All of the years of frustration and longing were gone. In his mind, she had always been his…but he could never claim her. But now he _had_ claimed her; she was his. The last man that would ever kiss her, hold her, love her. He was going to make her happy; with everything he had. He wanted to make up for all of the sadness and disappointment in her life.

Olivia came out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel and saw Elliot lying on his back, staring at the ceiling with a big smile on his face. She raised an eyebrow and smirked. "What are you doing?" she asked.

Elliot rolled over onto his side and looked at her, a big smile on his face. "Thinking about you." he said.

"Hmm. Care to share?"

Elliot got up and walked over to her, putting his hands on her shoulders. "I was thinking about how happy I am; how happy you make me. I was thinking that I want to tell everyone how much I love you and that I'm never going to have to be upset about you going out on a date or think about you in bed with some other guy. You're mine."

Olivia looked up at him. "Wow. Pretty bold Stabler." She looked down at her hand. "I don't see a ring on my finger." She teased.

"Liv." said Elliot, with a very serious look on his face. "I would marry you tomorrow if you'd let me."

Olivia laughed and pulled back. "How about we go on a date first?" She didn't like how serious this conversation was getting. She had no doubt that Elliot meant what he said, and she had dreamed of hearing those words from him, but things were escalating really quickly and making her a little nervous.

"Deal." said Elliot. "I'm going to take a quick shower.

Olivia pulled on some clean underwear, some jeans and a soft gray sweater. She touched up her makeup and fixed her hair while she waited for Elliot to get out of the shower. When he was done, he got dressed quickly and they headed out.

"Where do you want to go?" asked Elliot as they took the stairs at her apartment.

"Let's just go to the diner that's a couple of blocks down. It's casual, and it's a nice night out and we can walk."

When they reached the sidewalk, Elliot grabbed Olivia's hand and they strolled down the street. It was such an odd sensation for both of them. There had been years of purposefully not touching, afraid of what they would unleash. And here they were, just strolling down the street as if they had been doing this for years. It was amazing how comfortable and easy it was.

They reached the diner and were seated at a booth for two. They got some water and ordered their favorites off the menu. They held hands across the table, and they couldn't stop smiling at each other.

Elliot finally broke the ice. "I guess we can't just sit here and stare at each other smiling."

"Why not?" asked Olivia, laughing lightly. She knew the conversation was about to turn serious, and she wasn't sure she was up for it.

"Liv. I meant what I said earlier."

"I know."

"You don't want that?"

"I didn't say that." Olivia shook her head. "I never said that. It's just that usually there is a natural progression…"

"Liv, our relationship has progressed naturally…over 8 years. People don't normally date for 8 years."

"El, nothing about our relationship has ever been normal. And we have not been dating for 8 years. Stop saying that." She shook her head.

Elliot sighed. "I know we haven't been dating, but you have to admit that our relationship has grown and changed over the past 8 years."

"Yes. But as friends. Elliot, I never would have done anything to jeopardize your marriage. I tried to keep my feelings in check; I never wanted to come in between you and Kathy."

"Liv, we both know that we felt more for each other than we should…I fell in love with you years ago, and Kathy knew it."

Olivia looked up at him sharply. "El, she knows we never… She knows you didn't cheat on her, right?"

Elliot looked down at the table. "Liv. She knows we never slept together. But how do you define cheating? You and I have an emotional bond…I had given part of myself to you already. And Kathy knew it. I went to see her earlier this week, when I was upset about you and Matt. I thought that I had really messed up. That I had waited too long and now it was too late. And suddenly, I was completely lost. My world was crumbling and I found myself at my house. My old house. Kathy could tell something was wrong and I told her about you and Matt. And she told me…she told me she knew that you I was in love with you and had been for some time. She told me to tell you. "

Olivia's mouth was open, in shock about what Elliot was telling her. "It was my fault that she left you." She whispered.

"No! That's not why I told you that. We got divorced because we had grown apart. We were kids when we got married and we've become different people. We have honestly been happier since we've been apart, and she's moved on. She's dating someone else. And she honestly thought that as soon as we were divorced, that I would tell you how I felt. She couldn't believe that I hadn't."

Olivia still couldn't believe what she was hearing. Kathy was the one person that she had been terrified of telling about their relationship. Even though she had been invited to a lot of Stabler family events over the years, she had always felt a certain wariness from Kathy. And she supposed she would feel the same way if she had been in her shoes. She had to send her husband off to work with another woman every day; let him spend more time with that woman than his family, and trust that he would return every night.

"So…" said Elliot. "I think we should talk to Kathy tomorrow and figure out when and how to tell the kids"

Olivia groaned. "El. I thought we were going to wait awhile."

"I don't want to wait. I want to tell everyone. You said yourself that we're not going to be able to keep it a secret."

"I know. But if we tell your family, we're going to have to tell Cragen." She looked down at the table. "As much as I want this El, I can't imagine not working with you. I don't want another partner."

"I know Liv. And I've thought about it. But there's no going back now. And I will trade a partnership if it means I get to come home to you every night." He took her hand and smiled. "I think Cragen will let us both stay in SVU; just switch up partners. I know Fin will watch your back. Mostly because he knows I will rip him to shreds if he ever let anything happen to you."

Olivia smiled. She knew that was true.

"And then, when we start a family, maybe you can just stop working." Elliot stroked the back of her hand gently with his thumb.

Olivia was dumbfounded. First he had talked about marriage and now a baby. She tried to pull her hand away but Elliot held on.

"Liv. Am I scaring you?" Elliot smiled, still stroking the back of her hand.

"A little. It's just so…much. So fast."

"Liv. Do you love me?" asked Elliot, looking into her eyes.

"Of course."

"Then don't be afraid. I'm not going anywhere. I'm never leaving you. You are not going to be alone…ever again. We're going to be a family.


	30. Chapter 30

_Thanks for the reviews. I really do appreciate them all. Keep enjoying the story and providing feedback!_

From the end of the last chapter

"Then don't be afraid. I'm not going anywhere. I'm never leaving you. You are not going to be along…ever again. We're going to be a family."

EOEOEOEOEO

Elliot could see tears brimming on her lower lashes. He could see her struggling with what he had said.

"Liv. It's OK to be happy." he said softly, knowing she was still finding it hard to adjust to this new reality. "I meant everything that I said." He was still caressing her hands with his thumbs. "You have to let it go. Let all the worry go. I'm here to stay. Don't worry about Kathy, or the kids, or Cragen. Don't worry about what if's. You're safe with me and we'll work through all of it together."

Olivia looked down at their hands intertwined on the table. She was taken aback by Elliot's words. Who was this guy? She had never seen this side of him in the past 8 years. It was as if revealing his feelings had unlocked some secret side of him; and here she thought she knew him so well. Olivia had spent her entire life being independent; not needing anyone. She had a hard time letting someone take over control, even if it was just a little. But she was tired of it…and frankly, sometimes she wanted someone to take care of her. And she trusted Elliot…he could be that man.

"Liv." Elliot said softly, shaking her hands and pulling her eyes back to his. "Stop. Whatever you're thinking, just stop."

Olivia smiled. "I was just thinking about how much I trust you El. I have always trusted you with my life, but now I am giving you my heart. And it scares the hell out of me, but I can't take it back. I don't want to take it back. I…"

"Liv. Your heart is safe with me." he smiled. "But your body…now that's another story." he said, laughing, easing the tension between them. "The things I want to do to you Detective…"

Olivia pulled her hands away as the waitress approached with their food. She shook her head laughing, hoping to find out more about that when they got back home.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

The next morning, Olivia woke to hear someone banging around in the kitchen. She looked at the clock on her nightstand, and couldn't believe it when it said 9:00. She never slept this late! She rolled over on her back and smiled when she felt the ache between her legs. Last night had been amazing. Their love making had been less frenzied but no less passionate and she was certain she would have some new hickeys on her body to contend with today. She sat up and stretched just as Elliot walked into the bedroom.

"Ah, you're finally awake!" he said, handing a mug of coffee to her. "I thought I was going to have to wake you."

Olivia accepted the mug of coffee and took a quick sip. "I can't believe I slept this late. I can't believe I slept so hard and didn't wake up when you got out of bed. I am usually a light sleeper and I'm not used to sleeping with someone else in my bed.

"I guess I wore you out." said Elliot, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

"You have such an ego. Does it ever get tiring?" Olivia joked with him.

"You love it. You love everything about me." Elliot said. "Admit it." He leaned over to tickle her lightly in the ribs and she moved and pushed his hands away.

"Stop it. It's too early for that. You know I'm not a morning person." She picked up the mug and took another sip of coffee. "I need coffee and a shower before I even begin to feel human."

"Yeah, I don't know if I can wake up to this every morning. You are kind of grouchy." Elliot smiled.

"Whoa. Every morning? What makes you think you're going to be here every morning?" asked Olivia.

"Liv. C'mon. Really? We've waited this long to be together and now we're going to live apart? I don't think so. Did you? Do you?" asked Elliot.

Olivia sighed as the reality of this entire situation sunk in. She hadn't really thought much about what would really happen once they crossed that fine line holding them back. She thought about a kiss. She thought about sex…but not really about what would happen after that. But the fine line…those boundaries…were well and truly blown to hell.

Olivia shook her head. "I guess I didn't really think about it. But we have to talk about this stuff. You can't just make assumptions and assume I'm along for the ride. I hadn't even thought about it."

"OK. OK." said Elliot, putting his hands up in a defensive gesture. "You're right." He paused. "Are you still OK with going out to see Kathy this morning?"

Olivia took a deep breath. "El. I was thinking about that last night. And I think that I would like to go talk to Kathy by myself. I feel like I owe her that." She could see Elliot starting to object.

"El. If you're there, it's going to be awkward and you're going to be caught in the middle. She has the right to be angry and hurt, and I want to give her the opportunity to be open. She won't if you're there."

"Olivia. I already told you. She's the one that told me to tell you how I felt."

"I know El. But she and I have a history too, and I think it's just better this way."

"Are you sure?" Elliot asked.

"No, I'm scared as hell. I think Kathy could kick my ass." she smiled. "But I think it's the right thing to do. She probably has the right. And if I can get through that, then telling the kids and Cragen and everyone else will be easy."

She started to get out of bed, but Elliot pushed her back down, slowly letting his lips graze over hers and pushing her back down into the pillows. He whipped off his t-shirt and climbed over her, kissing her more forcefully. Olivia wrapped her hands around his neck, kissing him back. She pulled away and looked up at Elliot.

"Maybe I haven't been much of a morning person because I haven't been waking up to this every day. I could get used to this."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia finished getting ready after her shower, nervous about her meeting with Kathy. Elliot said he had texted Kathy and told them they were going to stop in and that Kathy had agreed. Elliot hadn't told her that it was just going to be Olivia that showed up on her doorstep.

She walked out of the bedroom and saw Elliot sitting on her couch, flipping through channels.

"OK." She said. "I'm going."

Elliot looked over at her. "Are you sure?" he asked. "I feel like I should be with you." He knew he wasn't going to change her mind, but he had to ask.

"El. We've been through this. I'm going."

"OK. Call me when you're on your way back."

Olivia grabbed the car keys off the table by the door and left before she could get cold feet.

It took about 45 minutes for her to reach the Stabler house in Queens. She pulled up in front of the house and turned the car off, but she didn't get out. She had no idea how this was going to go or what she was going to say, but it was certain to be interesting. She opened the car door and got out, slowly closing it behind her. She walked up to the front door and rang the bell.

She could hear noise in the background and someone yelling, but it was Kathy that answered the door.

"Olivia." She said, looking around and sounding a little surprised. "Are you here by yourself? Where's Elliot?"

"Hi Kathy. I thought it might be better if the two of us talked alone. Can I come in?"

Kathy hesitated, but swung the door open, motioning for Olivia to come inside. "The kids were just leaving. Kathleen is taking Dick and Liz to a movie." Just as she finished her sentence, the kids came around the corner.

"Hi Liv!" said Kathleen, walking up to the detective and giving her a hug. Olivia had spent a lot of time at Stabler family functions and was close to all of the Stabler kids. That's why it made this so much tougher; she felt like she was betraying their trust.

"Hi Kathleen. Good to see you."

Liz came up and wrapped her arms around Olivia's waist. "It's good to see you Olivia. I haven't seen you in so long." Olivia hugged her back.

"Hey Liv." said Dick. At his age, he didn't feel comfortable hugging Olivia any more. He felt too self-conscious, especially since he had always had a bit of a crush on her. Olivia smiled back at him.

"Bye guys. Drive safely" said Kathy as they went out the front door. She shut the door behind them and turned back to Olivia.

"So…can I get you something to drink? Coffee? Water?" Kathy asked, walking back into the kitchen. Olivia followed her but didn't sit down, feeling it would be presumptuous.

Olivia shook her head. "Got anything stronger?" she joked.

Kathy turned around, leaning against the counter. "Are we going to need it?" she asked.

"Kathy…" Olivia started, but had no idea what she was going to say. "Can I sit down?"

Kathy nodded, so Olivia sat down on one of the bar stools at the center island. She tried to gather her thoughts; she just didn't know how to even start the conversation.

Kathy turned around and got down a couple of glasses from the cabinet. She didn't turn back to Olivia, but braced her hands on the counter. She started talking in a quiet voice.

"I remember when Elliot came home after his partner retired. His old partner, Alphonse, was tired and worn out, and while Elliot was sad to see him go, he was excited about getting a new partner. I was too, because I wanted someone that was younger; someone that could have his back and make sure he came back to us every day. When he came home and told me his new partner was a woman, I was a little surprised. Not many women usually work in SVU." She laughed. "He said he wasn't sure if you could hack it, but overall, he said you two seemed to work well together, and so I was happy that things were working out. It's always such a hard adjustment getting a new partner."

She turned around and faced Olivia again. "I remember the first time I met you. Do you remember?"

Olivia nodded. She remembered.

"I had been bugging Elliot to invite you for dinner for months. He kept making up excuses." She laughed again. "I couldn't understand why he was being so difficult. He just kept saying you were busy, or that you guys spent enough time together…stuff like that. What was it? Over a year after you guys started working together before you finally came over." She paused. "I couldn't have been more surprised when you walked through the door. You were nothing like I imagined. All of a sudden, I was looking at this gorgeous, exotic looking woman, and I felt like this dowdy housewife."

"Kathy…" Olivia remembered. She recalled the surprised look on Kathy's face when she walked through the door. Dinner had been tense. Kathy shook her head, letting Olivia know she didn't want her to interrupt.

"I don't know if Elliot told you, but we fought about you that night. It wasn't that I thought anything was going on between you…but it felt…I don't know." Kathy shook her head. "Like I was in some kind of competition. But Elliot assured me that it wasn't like that…" she laughed again. "You don't know how many times we had that same fight."

Kathy came over to the island, bringing the glasses with her. She sat on a stool, across from Olivia.

"Over the years, our lives have become so intertwined. You have been at so many family events, you have been there for our kids, and you have kept Elliot safe. I know nothing ever happened between you physically. I know both of you would never do something like that. But you have no idea how hard it was to see him leave every day, and know that he was spending the day with _you_. That he was spending almost _all_ of his waking hours with you."

"A couple of years ago, I asked Elliot to get a new partner. I could tell he was too attached; that you two were too close. He refused. He absolutely, flat out refused and I realized that if I forced him to choose….well, I wasn't sure who he would pick. I was afraid he would pick you and I was scared as hell. So I went back into denial. I chose to ignore it."

"But about a year ago, I realized that we're fighting all the time. It wasn't a good environment for me, for the kids, for anyone. We weren't happy. I had lost. Elliot had given his heart to you." She teared up.

"I was angry. I was so angry. I can't tell you how many times I picked up the phone to call you and tell you to leave my husband alone. To just do the right thing and leave. But I knew that it didn't matter. He would follow you anywhere."

Kathy took a deep breath. "So I asked Elliot for a divorce. And here we are."

_More to come. Please review!_


	31. Chapter 31

_Thanks for the reviews. I really do appreciate them all. Keep enjoying the story and providing feedback!_

Olivia took a deep breath. "Kathy. You have to know… I never meant for this to happen. I never did anything to encourage this…"

"Really? You can honestly say that with a straight face?" said Kathy, her tone louder than before.

Olivia looked down at the counter and then looked back up at Kathy. "If I did, it wasn't intentional. Elliot and I had unspoken rules and boundaries regarding our relationship. We didn't touch. We made sure we were never in any kind of situation where we could be compromised. We didn't talk about anything too personal; certainly nothing about feelings between the two of us."

Kathy laughed again. "Do you hear yourself Olivia? You had rules and boundaries? If you didn't have feelings for each other…if you weren't afraid of giving in to your feelings… you wouldn't have needed those boundaries. That's what's so funny about this whole thing. I knew about the two of you before you two did. Or at least before the two of you would get out of denial."

Olivia didn't know what to say.

"Olivia. I'm not angry with you anymore. Honestly, I can't even believe I told you all of this. I wasn't quite sure what I was going to say to you if I ever saw you; but I guess I knew that you would show up here eventually. The reality is that Elliot and I got married when we were young. We were forced into getting married because of Maureen, so in some ways, it's surprising that our marriage lasted as long as it did. Elliot and I became different people over the years and neither one of us was happy any more. We fought about you, but that was just one symptom. In fact, it sucked because you're a nice person and have done so much for our family over the years. I wanted to hate you but I couldn't really. I guess it was just difficult because he had fallen in love with someone else and I was left…just left alone I guess. But in reality, I have felt alone for years. So now I am dating someone else. Steve makes me happy and things are going well."

She cocked her head a little, as if deciding what she wanted to say next. Olivia just waited. She knew she owed Kathy the opportunity to get it all off her chest.

"Olivia. Do you love Elliot?" she asked.

Olivia bit her lower lip. "I do." she said softly. "I'm so sorry about everything Kathy, but I do. I have for a long time."

"Then do me a favor. He's a good man. Take good care of him."

Olivia nodded. "I will." She whispered. "But where does that leave us?"

Kathy stood up. "I'm not angry any more Olivia. I've let that go. You didn't cause our marriage to end. Elliot and I did. If it wasn't you, it would have been someone else. It's time for both of us to move on."

Kathy motioned at the empty glasses. "Now do you want something to drink?"

"Sure."

Kathy walked over the freezer and pulled out a bottle of vodka. "I don't usually drink, especially not in the morning, but …"

Olivia laughed. "I could use a drink."

Kathy poured them each a shot of vodka and they both drank it down quickly. Kathy pushed the bottle towards Olivia as she sat back down.

"So." said Kathy. "You and Elliot have talked?"

Olivia nodded, a small smile flitting across her face before she could recompose herself.

"Oh, I see." said Kathy. She pulled the bottle back over and poured herself another shot. Olivia was horrified that she had given them away. Again, there was nothing she could say to make this less awkward.

"Kathy. I don't know how to move forward with…with this. I feel like this is always going to be awkward."

"You're probably right. It will for a while. But I imagine it will get better as time goes on."

Olivia shook her head. "I suppose."

"What are you guys going to do about work?"

Olivia let out a breath. "I don't know. You're the first person we've told. But we know we have to tell Cragen. We know they'll split us up but we're hoping we can both stay in SVU." Olivia ran her hand through her hair. "I guess we'll find out."

"And what about the kids? When are you going to tell them?"

"That's up to you and Elliot. But I wanted to talk to you first. Elliot said he would give you a call when I got back so you could discuss it." Olivia said.

"The kids love you Olivia, but I'm not sure how they're going to react. It's going to be an adjustment for everyone. They took it really hard when we split, and then again when I started dating Steve. But they can see how happy I am now, and I assume they will be happy to see their Dad is happy too."

"I hope so. I won't stand between Elliot and his kids."

"I don't think it will come to that."

Kathy stood up. "I appreciate you coming by today Olivia. And I appreciate that you came alone, and that you let me vent a little. When I saw you standing there at the door, I was a little nervous about how this was going to go."

"You were nervous? I was scared as hell. I wasn't sure if you were even going to let me in."

"Elliot told you about our discussion earlier this week, didn't he? I was the one that told him that he had to tell you."

"Yes, he did. But I still didn't know how you were going to react when I showed up. Thank you for…"

"For giving you my husband?" Kathy said. Olivia got wide-eyed. "I'm joking Olivia. Just trying to lighten the mood."

Olivia sighed in relief and smiled. "I guess I deserved that."

Olivia stood up and started walking towards the door.

"Olivia?" said Kathy. Olivia stopped and turned back to face her.

"Even though Elliot and I aren't married any longer, he will always have a special place in my heart. He loves you very much, so please take good care of him."

Olivia gave Kathy a small smile. "I will. I promise you."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia got into the car and took a few deep breaths. That was one of the hardest things she had ever had to do, which was almost comical considering her line of work. Let me interrogate perps all day long as long as I don't have to do anything like that again. But she knew this was just the beginning. She started the car and pulled away from the curb, stopping a few blocks away to call Elliot.

Elliot answered on the first ring. "Liv."

"Hi." she said, letting out a long breath through pursed lips.

"Are you OK?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

"You want to tell me about it?"

"Not on the phone. I'm headed back. We can talk then."

"OK." said Elliot, not wanting to push her. "I'll see you in a little while. I love you."

Olivia smiled. "I love you too." She hung up and pulled away, headed back to the city.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

When Olivia got back to her apartment, Elliot opened the door as soon as she put her key in the lock. He pulled her towards him as she walked through the door, hugging her close.

"I just got off the phone with Kathy."

"What?" asked Olivia.

"She called me after you left. After I hung up with you."

"What did she say?"

"She told me you had a good talk. And that she was going to let you tell me about it. But she wanted to talk about the kids."

Olivia pulled away and walked into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water out of the refrigerator. "What did you two decide?"

"We think that the two of us should tell the kids…without you." He hesitated. "Are you OK with that?"

Olivia turned towards Elliot and leaned against the counter. "Of course. It's completely your call."

"OK. Well, I mean, you're involved so…" Elliot wanted to let her know that he wanted her input.

"Elliot. It's not my place to be there. I get it." Olivia took a drink of water. "When?"

"The kids are all going to be home for dinner tonight so we decided to just go ahead. I mean, why wait?"

Olivia stretched her neck back and grimaced. All of this was giving her a headache. The tension in her neck was killing her.

"Are you OK?" asked Elliot, moving towards her.

"Yeah. This is all just going so fast."

Elliot reached up and started massaging her shoulders. "Liv. We talked about this. Why wait? The sooner we let everyone know what's going on, the sooner we can move ahead. I don't want to hide anymore." He leaned over and kissed her gently on the cheek. "I want to be able to hold your hand and kiss you whenever I want and not care about who sees us. And I plan on kissing you a lot Detective…"

Olivia smiled up at him. She captured his lips with hers, and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. When they broke the kiss, Olivia looked up at into his eyes.

"Kathy told me to take good care of you." She said.

"Oh? And what did you say?"

"I told her I would. And I am a woman of my word." Olivia pulled him close, wrapping one leg around him and kissing him again. Elliot smiled against her mouth and lifted her up on to the counter. "God woman…I love you so much."


	32. Chapter 32

_I really appreciate the reviews. Keep them coming. I love to hear from you! It gives me inspiration to keep going. Enjoy!_

EOEOEOEOEO

Olivia woke up and stretched, smiling after her nap. Elliot wasn't in bed, but she could hear him in the bathroom. She stretched her legs, trying to ease her sore muscles. She hadn't had this much sex in years…and Elliot was an enthusiastic lover. She looked over at the clock and saw that it was after 3 already. She knew Elliot was going to leave for Queens by 4:00, so he could spend some time with the kids before dinner.

When Elliot left, she was going to take a nice hot bath and relax with a bottle of wine. She wasn't sure how late Elliot would be back, but she would be waiting for him. She closed her eyes and smiled, remembering their afternoon 'activities'. She loved Elliot so much; she was in so deep.

Elliot came out of the bathroom and she opened her eyes and looked over at him as he walked out. He had a towel wrapped around his waist and she looked him up and down.

"Are you checking me out Benson?" he smiled at her.

Olivia smiled. "All the times you checked me out the last 8 years…I think you owe me." she said.

"Me? Checking you out? I don't think so. You must have been seeing things."

Olivia rolled her eyes. She pulled the sheets back, revealing her naked body. Elliot's eyes flicked over her body, taking her in from head to foot. "So." she said. "This doesn't interest you?" She gave him a sultry look, rubbing her long legs together seductively.

Elliot groaned. "Liv." He started walking towards the bed, dropping his towel.

"That's what I thought." She said, quickly pulling the covers back over her body just before Elliot reached the bed.

Elliot dropped his towel and climbed over her, trying to pull the covers back. But Olivia held on tightly. "Thought you weren't interested." She teased.

Elliot leaned down and kissed her hard, pulling her hands from the sheets and pinning them by her head. "If I had the time, I would show you just how interested I am."

Olivia looked down. "I can see." She smiled mischievously back at him.

"Liv. I feel like I've said this a dozen times in the past few days, but you are going to be the death of me. I wish I didn't have to leave right now." He leaned in and kissed her again, but then released her arms and climbed off the bed. "Are you going to be here when I get back from dinner?"

She shrugged her shoulders and crooked her mouth. "I'm not sure. I have to see what comes up."

Elliot shook his head. "Why are you always giving me such a hard time?"

"Because you're so easy…it doesn't take much." Olivia sat up in bed. "El. Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be here, not matter what time you get back. Don't rush back. Spend some time with the kids if everything goes OK. I don't want you to have the discussion and then run out the door."

Elliot finished getting dressed and turned to look at her. "OK. I won't."

"Elliot. It's really important to me that you're kids are OK with this. You know I won't get in between you and your kids. If they're not OK with this…" she shook her head, really hoping it didn't come to that. She didn't want to go back to the way things were. She didn't even think it was possible.

As if reading her mind, Elliot said "It's not going to come to that. My kids love you Liv. It might be weird at first, but they'll come around. They're old enough to understand."

"I hope so."

Elliot leaned over and gave her a kiss. "Don't worry. I'll call you when I'm on my way back."

EOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot walked into his old house in Queens, and was happy to see that all of the kids were already there. They swarmed him, happy to see him. It has been a couple of weeks seen he'd seen Liz and Dick, even more for Kathleen and Maureen, who lived on their respective college campuses. He followed them into the kitchen, where Kathy was busy stirring something on the stove. She turned when she heard the commotion.

"Hey Elliot." she said, as Elliot leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek. She put her spoon down and turned to look at him. He leaned against the counter next to her.

"You're in a good mood." she said. "Much better than the last time I saw you."

He laughed. He recalled the conversation between him and Kathy the last time he was here.

'Yeah. Hey…thanks. You know…for this morning." he said softly, even though the kids weren't paying any attention to their parents.

"Did you think I was going to slam the door in her face?" she said, knocking her shoulder into his. "If you remember, I'm the one that told you to be honest with her."

"I know, but still…I know it's an awkward situation."

Kathy cocked her head. "Elliot. I will always love you. But I've moved on. I'm happy with Steve, and even though I don't know what's going to happen, I want you to be happy too. I really do. And Olivia makes you happy."

Elliot leaned over and kissed her on the cheek again. "I love you too. And I'm glad you are happy with Steve. I would like to meet him sometime."

"I'm not sure I'm ready for that." Kathy said. "Are we going to be one of those couples that have a civilized divorce and have get-togethers with our new spouses and all the half-brothers and sisters?"

Elliot gave Kathy a startled look. "Are you getting married? Are you going to have more kids?"

"No. I don't know. Maybe… We really haven't talked about it." she looked up at Elliot. "But I guess I assumed you and Olivia would.

"Yeah, let's not rush things. We have a lot of stuff to get through."

Maureen walked over to them. "What are you guys talking about? Seems so serious over here." she said.

Elliot considered telling her right then. He hadn't really though through how he was going to bring it up; he couldn't imagine just bringing it up at the dinner table. Maybe it would be easier to tell Maureen and then the others. He looked over at Kathy, and she shrugged her shoulders. This was up to him; she was just there to back him up.

Maureen looked between the two of them. She had been joking around before, but now she could see something was up. "Is something wrong?" she asked, suddenly concerned.

"No." Elliot said quickly. "But…can I talk to you? Let's go out on the deck."

"Sure." She had a worried look on her face as they sat down in the deck chairs. "Dad, what's going on?"

Elliot looked down at his shoes, not sure how to start.

"How do you feel about your Mom and Steve?" he finally asked.

Maureen shrugged her shoulders. "It's fine. I like Steve. And Mom's happy. You know, I'm not here very much anymore, but before I left for school, I could tell you and Mom weren't happy. We all could. We weren't as clueless as you thought."

"So you were happy when we got divorced?"

"Happy? Of course not. But I guess we all knew that things weren't getting better so I guess we weren't surprised."

Elliot nodded. "How would you feel if I told you that I was seeing someone?" he asked, looking back down at his shoes.

She smiled. "I'd be happy for you Dad. I love Olivia."

Elliot jerked his head up, startled by what Maureen had said. "What did you say?" he asked, thinking he had misheard her.

"Jeez Dad. You don't think we could tell how you felt about her? I'm surprised it took this long."

"We?"

"Yeah. We've all talked about it before. We thought maybe that's why you guys finally split."

"Maur…I never cheated on your Mom. You guys know that, right?"

Maureen nodded. "Yeah Dad, we know you wouldn't do that to Mom."

Elliot sat back in the chair. He couldn't believe he was having this conversation. This was not how he was expecting this to go. His kids were always surprising him.

"Dad. You know we're not little kids anymore. Katie and I are in college."

"I know. I guess you'll always be my little girls."

Maureen stood up and wrapped her arms around Elliot. "I love you Dad. Can I tell the others?"

Before he could answer, Maureen ran into the house, banging the door behind her. He could hear her blurting out the news to her siblings and a lot of excited screaming and yelling from Katie and Liz. So much for them all being grown-ups.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Olivia heard her cell phone ringing, waking her up. She looked at her watch and saw that it was a little after 11. She had fallen asleep on the couch while watching a movie. She grabbed her phone and answered. "Hey."

"Hey." She heard Elliot's voice on the other end and she could also hear talking and laughing in the background.

"Are you still at Kathy's?"

"Yeah."

"Did you tell them?"

"Yes."

"And?" she asked, getting frustrated with his one word answers. He had to know she was dying to hear what happened. She heard the voices in the background getting louder and then she heard a bunch of yelling.  
"Who you talking to Dad?" someone said in a sing-song voice, making smooching noises.

"Hi Olivia!" yelled someone else. It was hard to tell who was talking. "We miss you!"

"Shhh!" Elliot said. "I'm trying to talk here."

"Dad, it's your turn." Olivia heard Dick say.

Elliot moved away from the kids so he could have a more private conversation. "I'll be back in a second." He said over his shoulder. Grown-ups huh?

"Liv. It went fine. Actually Maureen guessed as soon as I told her I was seeing someone, and then she ran in and told everyone else. The kids had apparently been betting on us getting together, so I guess Katie won some money from her brother and sisters."

"What?" Olivia hadn't been expecting that.

"Yeah. Go figure. So far, this has been easy."

"I wasn't expecting that but it sure makes things easier." Olivia admitted. "Are you coming back pretty soon?" She was surprised at how quickly she had gotten used to having him there.

"Well, the thing is, we're playing cards and having a good time. I really haven't had much time with the kids lately. I can't think of the last time all four kids were together at once. So I'm going to stay awhile. And depending on what time we get done, I might just crash here. Is that OK?"

"Elliot. You don't need to ask my permission."

"I know, but I just want you to know that I _really_ want to be back there with you too. I mean, I _really_ do."

"I know…it's fine El. I was sleeping anyway. I'm just going to go to bed. I could use the sleep."

Elliot laughed. "I know what you mean." He said, thinking back to last night and this afternoon. Elliot started walking back towards the kids and Kathy, seated around the kitchen table. "OK. I'll see you tomorrow?"

"I'll be here."

"Alright…" Elliot paused. He wanted to tell her that he loved her, but he was back at the table with Kathy and the kids and he felt uncomfortable. "So…"

"Good night Olivia! He loves you!" yelled Katie and Liz.

Olivia smiled when she heard them. "I love you too El."


	33. Chapter 33

_I really appreciate the reviews. Keep them coming. I love to hear from you! It gives me inspiration to keep going. Enjoy!_

EOEOEOEOEO

Olivia woke up when she heard her phone buzzing. She reached for it on the nightstand and saw it was a text from Elliot.

"Miss you. OK if I come over?"

She smiled. It was kind of funny, but she missed having him there. She had lived alone for years, and it had only been a few days with Elliot, but now that she had a taste of what life could be like…she didn't want to be alone anymore.

She debated what to text back, still not comfortable with sending him sappy messages.

"Let yourself in. I'll be here."

She looked at the time and saw it was a little after 2. Traffic from Queens shouldn't be too bad she thought as she drifted back to sleep.

EOEOEOEOEO

Elliot looked at his watch as he climbed the stairs to her apartment. He hadn't gotten out of the house right away as Maureen and Katie had still be up, teasing him about his decision to leave in the dead of the night to get back to Olivia. It was a little after 3 when he quietly unlocked the door and let himself into her apartment. He toed off his shoes by the door and quietly walked towards her room. He knew she was expecting him, but he didn't want to startle her, especially since she was armed. The bedroom door was partially open and he pushed it open. She didn't stir and he could see that she was sound asleep. She was sleeping on her stomach, with her arms up around her pillow and her face towards the door. He stood and watched her sleep. Whatever stress she had from the job and anything else in her life was gone and she looked so peaceful. Elliot was filled with an overwhelming feeling of love and a fierce desire to protect her and make her happy. He knew it had taken them a long time to get here but he was so thankful they were together now. When he told her he would marry her tomorrow, he had meant it. He would. And when he said he wanted to start a family with her, he had meant that too. He wanted to see her pregnant with his child. He wanted a little girl or boy with her eyes and her smile. He just wanted to give her everything she had ever wanted; he wanted to share her life.

He pulled his t-shirt over his head, unbuckled his belt and jeans and took them off as quietly as he could. He went over the other side of the bed, and climbed in next to her. She stirred when he got into bed and lifted her head up to look at him.

"Hey. I didn't hear you come in." she mumbled, still half asleep.

"Shh. Come here and go back to sleep. Sorry I woke you." He pulled her over to him and she snuggled in, her body fitting perfect against his. She placed a kiss on his chest and laid her head there. He trailed a hand down her back and found the spot on her lower back; a patch of skin between her tank top and her panties. He gently trailed a finger back and forth, reveling in the softness of her skin, and in the smell of her hair as he buried his nose on top of her head.

"Hmmm. That feels nice." She mumbled, feeling so peaceful.

"I could lie like this forever Liv. Say you'll stay with me forever." he whispered.

"Forever El." He could feel her smile against his skin and he pulled her closer as they both drifted off to sleep.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

Elliot woke up in the morning and could smell coffee. He looked over at the clock and saw it was already after 8. He stretched and rolled over, pulling the covers back up, when Olivia walked into the bedroom with a mug of coffee, headed towards the bathroom. He could tell she was walking lightly and trying not to wake him. She was wearing some small black panties and a light blue tank top, her breasts straining the thin material. He felt a rush to his groin and smiled. He wondered if his body was always going to react like that when he saw her half dressed…or naked. He knew the answer was YES.

"Good morning." he said, startling her and causing her to spill her coffee.

"Shit! I thought you were asleep!" she said, giving him a dirty look.

"Nope. Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

She smiled. "It's OK. I know." She walked towards the bed and set her coffee mug on the nightstand.

"Were you wearing that last night when I came to bed?" he asked.

She looked down at what she was wearing. "Yes. Why?"

"Because I wouldn't have been able to keep myself from ravishing you." He grabbed her arm, pulling her down into bed. He rolled her over on her back and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. He leaned in and tasted her mouth, tasting the bitterness of the coffee laced with something sweet.

"You taste good." he said. He worked his way down, placing small, gentle kisses down her jaw and dropping to her neck. He pulled down the strap of her tank, kissing along her shoulder. His hand wandered down, smoothing along her stomach and brushing under her breasts beneath her tank. He pressed his groin into her hip, letting her feel how aroused he was.

"You work fast Stabler." She whispered in a husky voice, sending another shiver through him.

"You drive me crazy Liv. I can't control my body around you. You've unleashed a monster." He teased, taking her breast in his hand and massaging and kneading it while placing kisses along her collarbone.

"I haven't even had my morning coffee." She complained, teasing him back. "I don't know if I have the energy…"

He looked up at her mischievously. "You don't have to do a thing…just let me have my way with you." He let his hand drop back down to her stomach, and slid a finger beneath the waistband of her panties, sliding it slowly back and forth along her sensitive skin. Olivia drew in a breath, feeling a rush of heat to her core. Damn Elliot. A simple touch and a few kisses could make her so wet. Elliot smiled as he continued to kiss along the top of her breasts, loving that he could draw a reaction from her. He smoothed his hand back up her stomach, pulling her tank top up.

"This has to come off." He said, pulling it up and over her breasts. She had to help him pull it completely over her head.

Elliot moved back a little and looked at her, taking her in from head to toe, clad only in a pair of black panties. "Sometimes I have to pinch myself" he said. "I can't believe I'm laying her next to you. You are so fucking beautiful."

"El." Olivia said, uncomfortable with compliments and the intensity of his stare.

"Liv. Don't you know how beautiful you are? Hasn't anyone ever told you that before?"

She looked away. "Of course but…" she trailed off.

"But what?"

"It's just something men say in the heat of the moment."

Elliot shook his head, sad that she doubted his sincerity. She was the most beautiful person he knew, inside and out, and it made him so sad that she had never had anyone in her life that made her understand that. "Olivia. I mean it. And I will tell you every day until you start to believe it." He leaned in and kissed her deeply, seeing a tear in her eye. When he broke the kiss, he smiled at her.

"Now, where were we?" He trailed kisses down her breasts, licking lightly around her peaked nipples. He ran his hand down her stomach and slid his hand beneath her panties. His hand slid further down, separating her folds with his finger and feeling the wetness there. He groaned and slowly moved his fingers back and forth over her sensitive clit, pulling a moan from deep within Olivia.

"Oh God El. That feels amazing…" her breath caught as he slid a finger into her, and then a second.

"Breathe Liv." He whispered before taking her breast in his mouth. He sucked and teased her nipple as he pumped his fingers in and out of her, using his thumb against her clit. He could feel her body start to tremble. He stopped teasing her breast and looked up at her. She had her eyes closed and was breathing heavily.

"Let go Liv." He said, pumping his fingers a little harder. A few more seconds and he could feel her walls clench against his fingers and her body stiffen, a rush of moisture coating his fingers. He kept moving and kept the pressure on her clit, causing her to thrash and groan from the intensity. He finally relented and she let go of a breath she had been holding.

"Jesus El." She threw her head back. "Fuck." She was breathing heavily as he stared at her. He lifted himself up and straddled her, his erection pressed against her, ready to enter her. He looked down at her and smiled. Her head was thrown back, her hair a mess, her eyes close and her skin flushed. He would take that image to the grave…she looked so amazing and so goddamn sexy.

"Liv."

She opened her eyes to look at him and she smiled. He leaned over, caging her body with his arms, and placing a gentle kiss on her lips. As he deepened the kiss, he slid inside, slowly filling her. He felt her gasp slightly as he entered her, and slowed down, allowing her body time to adjust. She groaned as he filled her completely and he started to move slowly, relishing the feeling of being inside of her. He would never grow tired of this. He moved slowly, and Olivia reached down, running her hands over his ass and his back and then down again. He reached down and lifted her ass, allowing himself to go a little deeper. She wrapped her long legs around him lightly as he continued to move slowly against her.

"Shit Liv. You feel so amazing." He quickened his pace and the friction of her walls against him was almost unbearable. He could feel the intensity building and knew he was close.

"Liv. I'm close. Come on baby." he said.

Olivia startled slightly at the endearment, but soon forgot it as she felt her own climax coming. It hit her suddenly, and she clenched around Elliot, digging into his back with her fingernails. Elliot was right behind her, mumbling a bunch of unintelligible words as he spilled inside her, focused on not yelling out with the intensity. He kept moving inside of her, relishing every moment. He was pretty sure that any dream he had ever had of her was nothing compared to the real thing.

He slowed his movements and kissed her gently. He brushed her hair from her eyes and smiled.

"I'm pretty sure I could die a happy man right now." he said. "I love you."


	34. Chapter 34

_I really appreciate the reviews. Keep them coming. I love to hear from you! It gives me inspiration to keep going. Enjoy!_

EOEOEOEOEO

Elliot lay down next to Olivia and pulled her close, trailing a hand up and down her back.

"What do you want to do today?" he asked.

"Hmm. Well, right now, I just want to take a nap." She said, snuggling in close. "We could spend the day in bed…" she suggested, smiling against his chest.

"I like how you think Detective." he said. "But if we're going to spend the day in bed, I have to have something to eat. I need to have some energy to keep up with you." He teased.

"With me? I was just lying here, minding my own business…" she teased right back.

"Yeah, right. I could tell you were an unwilling participant." He tickled her lightly on her ribs, eliciting a small laugh from her. "Tell you what. Why don't you take a little nap while I run to the store and pick up something to make us breakfast."

"You don't have to do that" said Olivia.

"I want to. I'm not tired. I'm just going to jump in the shower and I'll be back before you even wake up." He leaned over and placed a kiss on her cheek. He slid out of bed, and pulled the covers back over her. She snuggled in, already half asleep. He smiled, amazed at how quickly life had changed.

EOEOEOEOEO

Olivia awoke to the smell of bacon. She couldn't think of the last time she had cooked a full breakfast at home. Her stomach growled and she laughed as she got out of bed. She grabbed Elliot's t-shirt off the floor and pulled it over her head. She poked her head out of the bedroom door.

"Hey."

Elliot looked up at her and smiled. "Hey."

"Do I have time to take a quick shower?" she asked.

Elliot looked down at the food. "Sure. I'll keep the bacon warm and start the eggs when you get out of the shower."

She ducked back in and took a quick shower. She towel dried her hair and threw on some yoga pants and a t-shirt and walked back into the kitchen. Her mouth was watering as Elliot placed a plate of eggs, bacon and toast down on the breakfast bar. He grabbed another plate for himself and came around to her side of the bar, placing a gentle kiss on her cheek.

"Good morning."

"Morning El. This smells amazing. Thanks."

They started eating and Elliot filled Olivia in on the conversation with the kids the night before.

"I can't believe it was that easy." said Olivia. "I expected so many obstacles. Kathy or the kids at the very least."

"Maybe we'll be 3 for 3" he said, referencing the discussion they had to have with Cragen tomorrow.

Olivia sighed. "El…"

Elliot stopped eating; waiting to hear what she was going to say.

"I know we can't go back. I mean, I don't want to go back." She looked up at him quickly, worried that he misunderstood what she was trying to say. She placed a hand on his arm. "But I can't imagine not having you as a partner. I just can't."

"I know Liv. But you know we can't keep this a secret. And I don't want to. I am just hoping he will let us both stay in SVU. Then we'll still be together for a large part of the day."

"What if he won't?" she asked fearfully.

"I already told you that I would transfer. You're the heart of SVU Liv. It's what you live for."

"You too." She said.

"No. I don't. I love SVU, but not like you do. I probably would have left several years ago if it hadn't been for you. It's not my passion like it is for you. You're my passion now…"

She smiled. "I never thought I would hear Elliot Stabler say such sappy things." she said.

"And I will keep saying them if I can see you smile like that." He said, earning another big smile from her.

She shook her head. "See what I mean? Where was this side of Elliot Stabler all these years?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I guess you just bring out the better side of me."

"What about the last 8 years? Why did I just get the angry, overprotective, grumpy side of you then?"

"Two words. Sexual frustration." he joked. "C'mon, I wasn't that bad."

She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "No, you weren't. But seriously, how are we going to tell Cragen? And then how do we tell everyone else?"

"I think we just have to go into his office tomorrow morning and tell him. Otherwise we'll just be stressed about it all day. There's no reason to wait. And then we'll see how he wants to handle it. Some of it will depend on whether or not he's going to let us both stay."

Olivia let out a heavy sigh. "I guess you're right."

Elliot stood up and grabbed the plates.

"I'll clean up El. You made breakfast." Olivia said.

"Nope. You get your ass back in bed Detective and I'll be there in a few minutes" he said, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

"Bossy much?" she asked, smiling. "Are we going to watch a movie or should I bring the paper?" she asked teasingly.

"Up to you. Ladies' choice." He said, walking into the kitchen.

"Hmm." Said Olivia, walking towards the bedroom, swaying her hips in an exaggerated fashion and smiling back at Elliot.

Elliot finished cleaning up the kitchen and walked towards the bedroom. Olivia had shut the door, and when he opened it, he got a big smile on his face. Olivia was lying in bed propped up on her elbows, wearing a red lace bra, a sheer red thong, red heels and a sultry smile on her face.

EOEOEOEOEO

Elliot and Olivia woke to their alarm the next morning. They had spent a wonderful Sunday afternoon, but now reality was setting in and Olivia was nervous. They got ready for work and headed out the door, Elliot reassuring Olivia that everything would be OK. She wanted to believe him, but was having a hard time.

When they reached the precinct, Munch and Fin were already at their desks. Fin looked up as they walked in.

"Morning." He said.

"What are you guys doing here so early?" asked Olivia. Typically, she was one of the first people in.

"It's after 8." He said. "I'm always here by 8."

"Oh." Said Olivia, not realizing they had arrived so late. She was usually there by 7 at the latest. Where had the morning gone?

"Cap'n in?" asked Elliot, sitting down at his desk, trying to appear nonchalant.

"Yep." Said Fin.

Elliot got up and walked over to the Captain's office, looking back at Olivia. She had a panicked look on her face as he heard the Captain yell for him to come in. He opened the door.

"Captain. Got a minute?" he asked.

"Sure. What's up?"

Elliot walked in, and that was Olivia's cue to follow him. She got up from her desk, not looking at Fin or Munch, and went into the office, shutting the door behind her. Elliot was already seated, and Olivia sat down in the chair next to him.

"Captain." Elliot started, looking over at Olivia. Olivia had her hands in her lap, and was looking down at them.

"What's going on?" he asked, sensing trouble.

"Well…" Elliot felt like he had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He knew the Captain loved Olivia like a daughter. He suddenly felt really uncomfortable and it was clear that Olivia wasn't going to participate in the conversation.

"We think we need to switch up partners." Elliot said, taking the easy way out by not actually telling him anything.

"Are you two fighting again? Need a break?"

Elliot shook his head. "Not exactly."

"Oh. I see." He captain said as he realized what Elliot was telling him. He sighed. He had known it was only a matter of time. "Well, I suppose I should be grateful that it took you two so long to see what everyone else did."

Olivia looked up, and the Captain could see the miserable look on her face.

"Are you pregnant?" he asked her.

"No!" she said, startled by his question.

"Oh. Sorry. You just look so… Never mind." He decided not to finish the sentence.

"No. I just…I don't want to split up but I know we have to. But can we both stay in SVU? Please?" asked Olivia. "I don't want one of us to have to leave."

The Captain shook his head. "I don't know Liv. I have to think about it. I'm not sure how to handle it." He laughed. "You know, I've seen this coming for a long time. You think I would have had a plan. I guess I was hoping I would be retired by then and wouldn't have to deal with it."

He stood up and walked over to the window overlooking the interrogation room. He turned back to them. "Give me a couple of days, OK? Do you think you can work together for a few more days?"

The both nodded and Elliot reached over and placed a hand over Olivia's, giving it a gentle squeeze. The Captain noticed. "And you have to keep that out of the squad room." He said. Elliot quickly removed his hand from Olivia's. Cragen knew he wasn't to be able to keep them apart, but he hoped calling them on it periodically would keep the PDA to a minimum.

"Any thoughts on telling the rest of the squad…and the others? Casey? Melinda? Want me to send out a memo?" he joked, finally getting a smile out of Olivia.

"No, we haven't really thought about it." Elliot said, looking over at Olivia. "Maybe we should all go out for drinks after work. Loosen everyone up and then drop the bombshell."

Olivia nodded. "I think that's a good idea, and I will be the first one taking a shot." She wasn't sure what everyone's reaction was going to be. There was going to be a lot of "I told you so's. But probably also some grumbling as partners had to change…if the Captain let them both stay.

"OK, I'll leave that up to you guys. But do it soon." He said. Olivia and Elliot got up and walked out of the Captain's office. Fin and Munch looked up. "What the hell did you guys do to get called into the Captain's office before the week even started?" asked Fin, shaking his head. Those two were always in some kind of mess.

"We'll fill you in later" said Elliot, as he and Olivia sat down at their desks. It was going to be a long day.


	35. Chapter 35

_We're getting to the end of this story. It's time to move on to a new story. I really appreciate all of the reviews, so if you have any final comments, I would love to hear them. Watch for more stories from me! EO all the way._

EOEOEOEOEO

It was a quiet day in the precinct and Olivia and Elliot were able to catch up on their paperwork. The squad room was unusually quiet; there wasn't the usual banter going on between the teams, but everyone was getting caught up, so no one was complaining.

About 3:00, Elliot balled up a piece of paper and threw it at Olivia, distracting her from her work. 

"What?" she said, looking up.

"I was thinking we should all go out for a drink after work. You in?" he asked, trying to appear nonchalant.

"I suppose. I could use a beer." She said. She looked over at Fin and Munch. "You guys up for a drink? Elliot's buying."

"Hey, I never said I was buying." He protested.

"You invited me…you're buying." Olivia said. "What d'ya say Fin? John?"

"Hey, if Stablers buying, I'll go." said Fin. "I never turn down a free drink."

"I don't know" said John.

"C'mon John. You never go with us anymore. It will be fun. Please?" said Olivia.

"OK, but only because you asked me so nicely." He smiled at Olivia.

Olivia smiled back. "I'm going to give Casey a call." She looked over at Fin. "Why don't you call Melinda?" she asked.

Fin looked at her. "Why me?"

Elliot rolled his eyes. "Like no one notices you noticing her. Just call her."

"You want to be the pot or the kettle?" asked Fin.

"What are you talking about?" asked Elliot, shaking his head. "I'm not sweet on Melinda."

"Not Melinda you dope. Don't you think Olivia gets tired of you staring at her all the time?"

Olivia blushed; Fin's comments were hitting a little too close to home. "Fin." She said, giving him a warning look.

"What?"

Just then, Casey answered her phone. Olivia just shot Fin another look. "Casey. It's Olivia." There was a pause. "Yeah. Hey, we're all going to go out for a drink after work." Olivia looked over at Elliot. She mouthed "O'Malleys?" and he nodded. "O'Malley's. Elliot's buying." She added, smiling at Elliot as he started to protest. "OK, see you there around 6." She hung up. "She's coming."

She looked over at Fin as he was hanging up the phone. "Melinda's not sure if she can make it but she's going to try. Happy now?"

Olivia smiled. "Ecstatic."

EOEOEOEOEO

The closer it got to 6:00, the more nervous Olivia got. About 5, she excused herself and went up to the cribs. Elliot came in about 10 minutes later.

"Are you OK?" he asked when he saw Olivia sitting on one of the bunks.

She took a deep breath. "I just feel like my whole life is about to change." She said.

"_Now_ you feel like your whole life is going to change?" Elliot asked. "I would have thought that would have hit you a few days ago…like maybe when we were having sex." He smiled.

"I know. But this is different. I've thought about having sex with you a million times, but I've never thought about leaving SVU or about us not being partners anymore."

"A million times?" Elliot asked, smirking.

"Really, that's what you focused on?" Olivia said, batting at his arm.

He wiggled his eyebrows. "Yes."

"Your ego can't possibly get any bigger." Olivia shook her head.

Elliot sat down next to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "Liv, it's going to be fine. Everyone loves you and everyone is going to be happy for us. You know everyone thinks we've already been sleeping together…and I am sure there's more than one bet going on. Someone's going to win some money."

"You're horrible." She said, with a slight smile on her face. She just couldn't bring herself to be mad at him, even if he was acting flippant about the whole thing.

"Liv. We will deal with it as it comes. I already told you that there's no way you're leaving SVU, so don't worry about it. And if I have to leave, well…I still get to see you every night and every morning. And all the hours in between. It's a good trade-off I think." He nuzzled his face in her hair, and then leaned in and gave her a gentle kiss.

"Now let's go downstairs before people get suspicious." He stood up and started out the door. He turned around and mouthed to her "I love you" and walked out of the cribs.

Olivia pulled herself together and went down a few minutes later. When she got down there, Fin and Munch were already getting ready to leave.

"We're ready for a drink. We're going to take off a few minutes early. We'll get over there and save a table."

"Sounds good" said Olivia. "We'll be there shortly."

Once they were gone, Olivia looked over at Elliot. "How are we going to do this?" she asked.

"I think we just see when we get there. See what feels like a good time to break the news. Probably after everyone's had a few drinks." Elliot smiled.

Olivia took another deep breath. "OK."

The Captain walked out of his office. "Everything OK?" he asked, walking by Olivia and Elliot.

"Yep. We're going to O'Malleys. We're going to break the news there. You want to come?"

"Nah. I'll leave you to it." He said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Good night Captain." They both said, watching him walk out of the squad room.

EOEOEOEOEO

When Elliot and Olivia walked into the bar, everyone was already there, sitting in a large U-shaped booth with drinks on the table. Olivia squeezed in next to Casey, and Elliot sat next to her. The waitress stopped by and took their order; delivering refills for everyone already at the table. Olivia was glad to see that everyone had already had at least one drink.

The group spent the next hour drinking and talking, and Olivia was having a good time. She looked sideways at Elliot a couple of times, thinking maybe they didn't have to tell anyone tonight. She was starting to relax. She certainly wasn't going to say anything; she was leaving this all up to Elliot.

Fin held up his empty glass. "Hey, where's that waitress? I need another drink."

Elliot looked around the table. "Looks like everyone could use a drink. And Liv said I'm buying, so I'll go up to the bar and see if I can find out waitress." He slid out of the booth. At the last minute, he leaned in and put his hand on Olivia's shoulder. "What to help me babe?" he said, sliding his hand down her arm, grabbing her hand and pulling her towards him.

Olivia looked shocked, and heard Casey gasp beside her. "What did you just say?" Casey asked, looking at Elliot like he had lost his mind.

Elliot pulled Olivia out of the booth, and pulled her close, wrapping his arm around her waist. "I asked if Liv wanted to give me a hand."

Everyone stopped talking and looked at the two, Fin with his mouth hanging open.

"Liv?" asked Casey, a confused look on her face.

Olivia looked at her friends seated around the table. "I'd love to." She leaned over and kissed Elliot gently on the lips. "Let's go." She grabbed Elliot's hand from around her waist and they walked to the bar hand in hand.

"I'd love to see the expression on their faces right now." Olivia whispered to Elliot. He looked over at her and smiled.

"Me too. What do you say we really give them something to talk about?" He stopped, wrapped his arms around Olivia and pulled her close. He pressed his lips against hers and the shared a passionate kiss in the middle of O'Malley's. When they broke their kiss, Elliot pulled her into an embrace.

"I love you Olivia Benson. And everything's going to be just fine. This is forever."

**The End.**


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